Editor’s Note: The following is a totally made up story that is not true. While it is indeed plausible given the recent remarks by ISU AD Jamie Pollard and his apparent head in the sand stance on The Des Moines Register’s complete rear end kissing of all things Iowa State, this is not something that actually happened. Yet.
In a follow-up to his tweet denouncing the Des Moines Register’s sports page for its biased coverage, Jamie Pollard fired more shots at its sibling Gannett paper, The Ames Tribune: “There is simply too much coverage of Ames High on its website and I will be cancelling my subscription to the Tribune right now.” Pollard attached a slightly askew phone picture to the tweet, which he totally could have accomplished using Snipping Tool, available on his toolbar.
When reached for comment*, Pollard told BlackHeartGoldPants**, “Listen, I know they only added that story about the softball team because I complained about the lack of coverage by the Des Moines Register. Check out the timestamps. I tweeted my disdain about the Register at 8:24 and that story was posted at 8:53.”
* We did not reach out for comment; this is a joke
**He did not talk to us, this is a joke. That quote and those below are fake.
He added, of Randy Peterson’s story, “It’s packed with quotes from yesterday’s press release and got a couple typos, to boot. I could write that!”
In reviewing the Ames Tribune sports page, there was plenty of coverage of Ames track and golf regionals, no doubt stories relevant to the subscriber base and accessible for the media to cover. There were also articles about the departed baseball team and Xavier Foster available to both Des Moines Register & Tribune subscribers, due to the Gannett connection.
Pollard continued, “The Tribune is so slanted in their media coverage towards local high school sports. Iowa State sports is the only thing that matters!”
In trying to discern Pollard’s preferred media outlets, he noted Cyclone Fanatic - “the most comprehensive Cyclones sports coverage this side of cyclones dot com” - and fellow SBNation site Wide Right Natty Lite - “when they aren’t sharing their favorite links of the day, they’re breaking news about the Iowa basketball team the mainstream media is afraid to do.”
Pollard seemed particularly miffed by “cancel culture” and described the lack of coverage as a cancelling of Iowa State sports. He noted he was keeping an eye on the Carroll Daily Times Herald and Creston News Advertiser before BHGP ended*** the interview.
***we did not end the interview because none took place as this is a joke