clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:


These are accurate, don’t dispute me

LSU v Wisconsin Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images

Each week I’ll give you The Pants’ completely cromulent, totally unbiased Big Ten power rankings based off the previous weeks games. These rankings are based solely on what I saw and read from the games of last week, and not where I really think these teams might shake out. We won’t really know how things will really look until these two teams start playing each other, but here it is.

  1. Wisconsin (1-0): What about Ohio State, you ask, which ran roughshod over a hapless Bowling Green? Or Michigan, which only allowed three points to a Hawaii team that didn’t even get game film of the Wolverines, despite Michigan having the viewing pleasure of Hawaii’s game against Cal? Yeah, well, Sconnie scheduled LSU for week one and those cheese-drunk Wisconsinites sent Les Miles home with nothing but a belly full of Lambeau turf and a seat warmer for the plane. Wisconsin deserves this ranking at this time, and that’s that.
  2. Ohio State: (1-0): We’ll go ahead and give tOSU No. 2 here simply because the Buckeyes didn’t pull that lame video crap like Michigan, and because J.T. Barrett threw 6 touchdowns.
  3. Michigan (1-0): I hate putting the Wolverines here as much as the next guy, but yeah sure why not?
  4. Iowa (1-0): Some will argue it wasn’t pretty, but when it’s all said and done, Iowa more or less put on an offensive clinic against Miami (at least in the running game) and the Hawkeyes were pretty dominant on defense save for a … few lapses in the secondary. I wonder how many yards Mabin is going to run in practice this week?
  5. Michigan State (1-0): Tyler O’Connor didn’t look great as the future at quarterback for Sparty, but the defense allowed just barely over 200 yards, and that’s a pretty tall order regardless of who’s on the other side of the field.
  6. Indiana (1-0): I’m putting the Hoosiers here because despite losing like five starters before the game even started, Indiana put up just under 500 yards of offense and forced three interceptions. Is #CHAOSTEAM back?!?!
  7. Illinois (1-0): Seventh-year senior Wes Lunt looked his usual self in the opener against Murray State, going 15-21 for 226 yards and 3 touchdowns. The Illini also amassed just under 300 yards on the ground while the defense allowed -10 yards rushing to the Racers, creating net of 165 yards total of offense.
  8. Penn State (1-0): Pretty unimpressed with Saquon Barkley’s numbers in his game against Kent State, and Trace McSorley seemed to pick up right where Christian Hackenberg left off, which isn’t exactly great.
  9. Nebraska (1-0): The only reason I’m putting the Huskers in front of Purdue is because Nebraska had more rushing yards than Fresno State had total yards, and because Nebraska is also not Purdue. The Cornhuskers also had an unbelievable gesture for Sam Foltz, which makes up for having Tommy Armstrong at quarterback.
  10. Purdue (1-0): Purdue found a way to take a 21-point win and make it look unimpressive. The Boilermakers benefitted from four turnovers and were still only won by three scores. Markell Jones had a pretty great day running the ball, but that’s about all there is to say.
  11. Maryland (1-0): *checks box score* Nine different players caught a pass for the Terps, while the team amassed over 300 yards on the ground. It seems right to put them here.
  12. Minnesota (1-0): It took a brain fart and a stroke of luck for Minnesota to get over Oregon State, and I look forward to seeing how eventual first-round pick Mitch Leidner will fare against Big Ten competition after going 13-26 for 130 yards against a really stout Beaver defense.
  13. Northwestern (0-1): Welp. A couple idiots on this site predicted Northwestern to have a breakout year and challenge Iowa for the West. Annnnnnd even though this is a non-conference loss, falling to Western Michigan at home isn’t a great sign for things to come.
  14. Rutgers (0-1): The Scarlet Knights got sandblasted by a really good Washington team, but still. I don’t think we’ll see Rutgers change positions on this list any time soon.