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Sunday Morning Coming Down

It’s the Monday afternoon edition, though.

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Miami (OH) v Iowa
No, this is not a picture of anyone that was arrested (at least to our knowledge, who knows?)
Photo by Matthew Holst/Getty Images

And there's nothin' short of dyin'

That's half as lonesome as the sound

Of a sleepin' city sidewalk

And Sunday mornin' comin' down.

Every Sunday, I take a look at the football-related arrests in Iowa City and give you a breakdown. I know - it’s Monday - but it’s also my page and I can do whatever I want you aren’t my boss.

According to a press release from the University of Iowa - there were only four! football-related arrests on Saturday at Kinnick Stadium. (No wonder Iowa City keeps dropping in the party school rankings.)

Kyle Engesser, 19, of Blue Earth, MN was arrested for Public Intoxication after he was found by officers passed out on the concourse of Kinnick Stadium. Engesser told the officers it was “Tuesday” and was unable to answer basic questions. He blew a .214% BAC on a PBT.

Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. It’s the three-year anniversary of Vodka Samm’s arrest at Kinnick Stadium, and we expect better out of someone who’s from the home of the Jolly Green Giant.

It might be Tuesday before you sober up and get out of jail, though. .214%? Bruh.

Aaron Obermueller, 20, of Iowa City, IA was arrested for Public Intoxication at Kinnick Stadium after he was observed vomiting on the concourse. He admitted drinking too much and blew a .225% BAC on a PBT.

I’ve been there, Aaron. Well, no, not jail. And I’ve also never vomited in Kinnick. You know what? No, I haven’t been there. I hope you get to feeling better, though.

Cory Nock, 18, of Iowa City, IA was arrested for Public Intoxication and was reported by event security as being intoxicated. The defendant dropped the contents of his wallet on the ground. He had bloodshot, watery eyes, slurred, speech, and the odor of alcohol on his breath. He admitted to being drunk and refused a breath test.

I’m glad you refused to blow into a breathalyzer. Need to build a case here.

John Woodruff, 18, of Iowa City, IA was arrested for Public Intoxication after he was seen walking into walls at Kinnick Stadium. He has an odor of an alcoholic beverage on his breath, slurred speech, and did not know where he was at. He blew a .193% BAC on a PBT.

You didn’t know where you were? Neither did Miami’s cornerbacks.

You know who else runs into walls? Iowa State players. Well, walls...and each other.