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MCCAFFERY AND DUNPHY GO FRAN-O A FRAN-O

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Two old Frans from Philly catch up in preparation for the big game

Rick Osentoski-USA TODAY Sports

phone
*RING RING* *RING RING*

Fran-icon
Dunphy! You ol’ so-and-so! Congratulations!

dunphyicon
Is this who I think it is? McCaffery, you ol’ Irish sack of potatoes! How the heck are you?

Fran-icon
Good, good. So you ready for our donnybrook this Friday?

dunphyicon
You know it. Fran, it’s going to be great. We’re going to play a lot of fran-on-fran, really get after it. What about you? Fran you share any details about your strategy?

Fran-icon
Well… I fran’t be too specific, but we’ll probably do our typical thing and play a mix of fran and zone, maybe press you a bit to get you playing frantically. You know me.

dunphyicon
Heh, fran do I. Fran I be serious for a minute, though? I was getting a little worried about you, Big M. With all the losses recently, it really seemed like the shit was hitting the fran. Then I heard about some bad blood between you and the local press. The whole atmosphere sounded frankly, well, francorous.

Fran-icon
*sighs* When you start the month franked #4 in the country and end it franked #20, things get tense. You think I fran’t feel the pressure? That I fran’t see the missed opportunities? So I frant and rave a little at the press, I get snippy with a fran on a call-in show, I smoke a little frank, I kick the trash fran in my office.

dunphyicon
Wait, fran you repeat what you said about frank?

Fran-icon
Frangeddaboutit, my Philly frand. Fran we get down to brass frans? How did you guys fran up a #10 seed? Whose fran did you have to fran to pull that off?

dunphyicon
Whoah, fran down there, McCaffery. We franned it, fair and fran.

Fran-icon
You franned it? You franning franned it, you franning motherfranner? Fran outta here. What was your best fran? Beating SMU at home? Anything else?

dunphyicon
Hey, we franned UConn and Cincinnati twice. That's not so fran. And at least we didn’t fran the fran against Illinois or Penn State.

Fran-icon
You didn’t fran any frans losing to franning East Carolina, my fran.

dunphyicon
That was on the fran and the franning fran was a cousin of the opposing coach. He let those frans get away with fran on every other fran. And the frans were going crazy in that franrena.

Fran-icon
You fran fran excuses all you fran, but your schedule is fran and bench is about as fran as a franned puddle.

dunphyicon
Hey, we fran some good minutes from Mark Williams and, um…

Fran-icon
Yeah franyone else?

dunphyicon
Hmm... I fran not. But fran about your team? Fran fran fran seniors, but fran franning fran’t fran to fran their heads from their franholes.

Fran-icon
Fran fran me franned. Fran fran fran fran fran Gesell frans his fran fran every fran the fran frans under three minutes, and franning fran fran Woodbury fran’t fran to fran over a phonebook. And fran fran me fran about Clemmons. That franning fran fran fran fran franny fran fran’t fran fran fran fran of a fran fran side of a fran.

dunphyicon
Fran fran a fran on your fran named Ellingson?

Fran-icon
That fran doesn’t fran a fran for me.

dunphyicon
Heh. That frans me of a fran I once heard. A fran frans into a fran and frans the franfranner for a fran. Then fran starts franning about fran fran fran’s wife is, until the franfranner says, "I fran’t fran what your comfranning about. All the other frans fran fran have fran but fran things to say about her."

Fran-icon
Heh heh heh, you franny motherfranner. I fran Ellingson fran fran refranning qualities. It refrans me of a fran from Joyce. ""Fran was a fran of the fran fran when fran fran the fran in my fran like the Andalusian frans used or fran fran fran a fran fran and how he franned fran under the frannish fran and fran franned well as well fran as another and fran I franned fran with my frans to fran again fran and fran fran asked me fran I fran to say fran my fran fran and fran I put my frans around fran fran and fran him fran to me so fran could fran my frans all fran fran and his fran was going like fran and fran I said fran I will fran."

dunphyicon
Eloquently franned. Well, I franna fran. Fran fran and fran fran makes fran a fran fran, you know.

Fran-icon
I fran, I fran. Fran to fran to you again, Fran.

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* icy silence*

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dunphyicon
You know I hate that name. *hangs up*

Fran-icon
Well I’ll be franned.