THE PANTS PREDICTS: WEEK 9

Let’s check in on our meaningless standings, finally grouped by winning percentage! John is at the bottom, as he has many less games than the rest, but he can probably be figured in next week.

Alex: 24-9 (.727)
Jonah: 22-11 (.667)
Ben: 17-9 (.654)
Max: 21-12 (.636)
Dylan: 21-12 (.636)
Danny: 17-10 (.630)
Rob: 16-11 (.593)
Nathan: 18-15 (.545)
John: 13-7 (.650)

And that’s all there is. How no one is below .500 is beyond me.

Minnesota at Illinois

Max Brekke: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What in the actual hell are you guys doing?? I’m honestly shocked and hurt to see people picking Illinois to win anything. I know Minnesota isn’t good, per say, but Illinois? C’mon. Minnesota 21, Illinois 6.

John Krzmarzick: Illinois is a pretty bad football team. They might beat Iowa in a few weeks, because that’s just how things are going right now. But I just don’t see them beating this Minnesota team, who surprisingly has not completely imploded yet. Minnesota 24, Illinois 21.

Nathan Darus ( HawkInATX): I can safely say that this is a game I have absolutely no desire to watch. At all. Illinois is bad. Minnesota is “meh.” But just for the sake of being crazy, I think Minnesota totally craps the bed on this one. Illinois 31 - Minnesota 24.

Rob: This is a matchup of average and abysmal and I can assure you, I have very little interest in this game. With that said, I have hard time seeing how Minnesota can flop here. Minnesota 24, Illinois 21.

Dylan: Hit the snooze button. Illinois is bad and Minnesota isn't much better. I honestly don't know who has the edge where. Illinois has a decent DL and Minnesota almost lost to Rutgers at home. What the hell, I'll take the Illini. Illinois 27, Minnesota 21.

Ben: Remember when Minnesota almost just lost to RUTGERS AT HOME? Yeah that happened. I think this game will be close, but give me Lovie Smith over Tracy Claeys here. Illinois, 35, Minnesota 28.

JPinIC: Minnesota, not great at football. Illinois, not good at football. I’ll take Minnesota. #analysis Minnesota 31, Illinois 24.

Alex: This is a terrible game on the surface and I find myself surprisingly tempted to take Illinois at home here. So, yeah, let’s go with that. Illinois 23, Minnesota 20.

Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images

#2 Michigan at Michigan State

Max: I feel so bad for Michigan State after what they did to Michigan last season. You think Harbaugh is going to walk into this game and expect to throw less than 50 points on them after the blocked punt fiasco? Michigan runs up the score and it’s not even remotely pretty. Look away. Michigan 61, Michigan State 13.

John: After Michigan State managed to pull off a nearly impossible victory last season, I expect the Wolverines to come out with a vengeance this year. There’s also the fact that Sparty has been a complete and utter mess since their victory over Notre Dame (speaking of complete and utter messes…), while Michigan is arguably the best team in the nation. Michigan 45, Michigan State 17.

Nathan: In any other year, this would be a great game to watch. As it is, it will be a great game to watch as Jim Harbaugh laps up the tears of Mark Dantonio. Michigan 52 - MSU 17.

Rob: This is one of the worst Michigan State teams that college football has seen in the past decade and when you consider how last year’s contest between these two ended, there’s no question Michigan fans would love nothing more than to pile it on. Michigan State… I apologize for what you’re about to experience. Michigan 42, Michigan State 14.

Dylan: Harbaugh is going to unleash hell on Michigan State after the way last year’s game went. Couple that with the fact that MSU just isn't very good. I can finally pick against MSU and feel confident about it! Just to add insult to injury, I think Michigan blocks a punt as well. Michigan 56, MSU 10.

Ben: Surely Jim Harbaugh has forgotten Michigan State’s blocked punt win in the Big House last year, right? Wrong. Jim Harbaugh is just like elephants in that he doesn’t forget and came out of the womb at a healthy 205 lbs. Gimme the Wolverines and Dantonio’s tears. Michigan 49, Michigan State 17.

JPinIC: I keep saying I’m not going to pick against MSU until they win. But I draw the line here. I don’t care about the fire burning in MSU’s stomach for a rivalry game, Michigan is just too good. I would’ve picked them at the start of the year before we knew how brutal MSU would look this year so I’m not changing my mind now. Michigan 45, Michigan State 20.

Alex: I think Sparty finds enough pride to keep this one close-ish for a half. But Michigan looks pretty damn good right now, and I’d be stupid to pick against them at this point. Michigan 38, Michigan State 17.

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#24 Penn State at Purdue

Max: Purdue gave Nebraska a contest last week! Is Purdue good, or is Nebraska bad? Well, regardless, David Blough is going to throw for a ton and Saquon Barkley is going to put PSU on his back. Penn State 30, Purdue 21.

John: Although this is a classic letdown spot for the Nittany Lions after their epic comeback win over Ohio State on Saturday night, they are playing a Purdue team that is, you know, terrible. Penn State 41, Purdue 21.

Nathan: Penn State gets a freebie here after unbelievably beating the Buckeyes last week. Even in a classic trap game, Purdue isn’t going to be able to keep this one close. PSU 35 - Purdue 13.

Rob: After shocking the entire college football world last weekend in Happy Valley, as the Nittany Lions knocked off the then ranked #2 Buckeyes, they now look to take on Purdue… Poor Purdue. The Nittany Lions have a real shot at running the table with their remaining schedule and finishing the season with a record of 10-2 and Purdue. Chew on that. Penn State 45, Purdue 10.

Dylan: Purdue gave Nebraska a good fight in Lincoln. I think that was more a result of Purdue coming out with something to prove without fired coach, Darrell Hazell, present. I think they get right back down to earth this week. Oh and Penn State is actually better than pretty much everyone thought. Penn State 37, Purdue 17.

Ben: Penn State is just gonna win I don’t wanna give this game any more thought: Penn State 35, Purdue 8.

JPinIC: I think Penn State is going to instantly become vastly overrated thanks to the win of OSU, but Purdue is just brutal. Penn State 38, Purdue 24.

Alex: Penn State’s win over Ohio State last week was absolutely crazy. They’re probably due for a letdown in West Lafayette, but Purdue isn’t even close to good enough to take advantage. Penn State 34, Purdue 13.

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Maryland at Indiana

Max: Look, I know Indiana has shown the past few weeks that they’re not actually that good, but I’m not sure how Maryland will win this one. Indiana 21, Marland 13.

John: Indiana’s quarterback still wears no. 21. Indiana 31, Maryland 27.

Nathan: It’s hard to get excited about this. Actually, it’s hard to get excited about any of the matchups this week, except Nebraska/Wisconsin. This should be a pretty good offensive showdown. Indiana 45 - Maryland 28.

Rob: Indiana, for whatever reason, is always a fun team to watch. However, Maryland … not so much. Maryland 17, Indiana 31.

Dylan: Maryland has been pretty wildly inconsistent all year. Indiana is less so. Once again, IU’s defense is better but their offense is t quite as explosive. But at least I know what I'm getting with Indiana. Indiana 31, Maryland 27.

Ben: Both these teams have shown flashes of greatness. I think. I don’t really know, I’m just here for Richard Lagow. Indiana 45, Maryland 28.

JPinIC: I’ve been one of the few who constantly picks against Indiana around here. And I actually think Maryland is mediocre. But I like Indiana here. Indiana 34, Maryland 27.

Alex: This week, I’m actually going to hop on the Hoosier hype train that’s been rolling through BHGP all year. Maryland doesn’t have enough to pull this one off on the road. Indiana 31, Maryland 27.

Jerry Lai-USA TODAY Sports

Northwestern at #6 Ohio State

Max: I don’t think the Buckeyes are going to be all too happy after dropping that game last week in the way that they did. I think they’ll get the offense back on track against a team that gave up 31 (!!!) points to the Hawkeyes very anemic offense. Ohio State 52, Northwestern 17.

John: While a very, very small part of me believes that the Buckeyes are in trouble in this game (considering jNW has seemed to find an identity and kept themselves in the B1G West race), I know better than to pick against Urban Meyer after a loss like last week. Ohio State will bounce back and get their season back on track. Ohio State 38, Northwestern 17.

Nathan: Has Urban Meyer ever lost consecutive games? Well, yes, but it’s only happened a couple of times, and only once since joining the Big Ten. And that was the B1G championship and an Orange Bowl in 2013. In fact, Meyer has never had more than one conference loss in a season at the helm of OSU. I don’t think that streak ends against NW. Ohio State 52 - Northwestern 24.

Rob: This is one of those games that have the potential to get really ugly really fast, as the Buckeyes are working their way off an upset loss at the hands of Penn State this past weekend. The Buckeyes are still very much alive for a playoff berth if they win out and I believe this weekend they’ll self-correct. Northwestern 21, Ohio State 49.

Dylan:Northwestern has found life the last few weeks. Unfortunately they're going to be dealing with a pissed off Ohio State at the Horseshoe. It's also an Ohio State that could still claim the East Division and go to the B1G Championship and maybe the playoff still. I think Ohio State lays the hammer. Ohio State 42, Northwestern 17.

Ben: It would be pretty chaotic if Northwestern could get a win out of Ohio State here. When was the last time the Wildcats beat Ohio State? Someone answer that question for me in the comments thanks. Ohio State 55, Northwestern 24.

JPinIC: Well, Penn State poked the bear. I have a feeling OSU comes out and unloads on Northwestern. I still think Northwestern is better than most expected coming off those non-conference losses, but this one won’t be close. Ohio State 52, Northwestern 20.

Alex: Surely Ohio State won’t get tripped up by an inferior team two consecutive weeks, right? Right. The Buckeyes will be out for blood in this game. Ohio State 45, Northwestern 23.

Photo by Matthew Holst/Getty Images

#7 Nebraska at #10 Wisconsin

Max: Ahem, allow me to say one thing, and one thing only… NEBRASKA AIN’T PLAYED NOBODY. Seriously, I’ve seen some of their fans get mad when people say Northwestern is the best team they’ve played this season, and they say it was WYOMING. FUCKING WYOMING. Wisconsin 21, Nebraska 17.

John: The de facto B1G West title game (sorry Northwestern…). While I have tremendous respect for this Badger defense (especially after watching the debacle that is the Iowa offense fail to score a touchdown last week), I just don’t think Wisconsin can possibly get up week after week after week with the schedule they’ve had to play so far this season. Despite the fact that I have absolutely zero respect for the Cornhuskers, I’m going with Nebraska. Nebraska 24, Wisconsin 13.

Nathan: Wisconsin played Ohio State really close, then let Iowa hang around in game that should have been put away early in the second half. I think we’re finally starting to see the wear and tear on the Badger defense, and I don’t think they have the guns outshoot Nebraska. Nebraska 27 - Wisconsin 17.

Rob: This is the game everybody is talking about and, quite honestly, this is the game I’m most looking forward to this weekend. Wisconsin’s defense is no joke and they showed that against the Hawks. However, with star linebacker Jack Cichy now out for the season and a lack of true identity on offense, I believe the Cornhuskers pull this one out in a tight contest. Nebraska 21, Wisconsin 17.

Dylan: Surprised to see so many people picking Nebraska when it seems like everyone has been waiting for them to stumble this year. I on the other hand have thought Nebraska is much better than folks have been giving them credit for. Ultimately, I think Wisconsin is too beat up to close this one out, even in Camp Randall. Nebraska has a pretty salty running game and will take the fight right at a beat up LB corps. And I still don't think very highly of Wisconsin’s offense. Nebraska 24, Wisconsin 14.

Ben: LOOK AT ALL THESE BHGP SHEEP PICKING NEBRASKA. Seriously, have any of you guys been watching Nebraska and Wisconsin play football? Nebraska has close games against Oregon, Illinois and Purdue, whereas Wisconsin played Michigan and Ohio State to one score. Give me the Badgers and you all can keep your idiocy. Wisconsin 24, Nebraska 10.

JPinIC: Nebraska has looked pretty decent this year, I’ll admit it. But so has Wisconsin. And at this point, we know what Wisconsin is. I still don’t think we know what Nebraska is. We’ll know more after this weekend and even more after next. I just think Tommy Armstrong against this Wisconsin defense is a recipe for success for the Badgers. Wisconsin 24, Nebraska 17.

Alex: Way too many people picking the Huskers on the road here. Nebraska has barely played anyone with a pulse (Oregon, maybe?) and that Wisconsin defense is legit. Two-Pick-Tommy makes an appearance and Wisconsin grinds out a close win at Camp Randall. Wisconsin 20, Nebraska 13.