It's one of our favorite nights of the year, the Royal Rumble (7 p.m. CT, WWE Network). If you're already a WWE Network subscriber, you know where to find it. If you're not and have never been, you can get the Rumble for free, and it's worth the price. You don't need any background beyond this: There are 30 guys in the match. They each draw a number and enter the ring in two-minute intervals. The only way to get beat is by being thrown over the top rope and to the floor. And, for the first time in more than 20 years, the last man standing is the WWE Champion.
All of the Mothership Rumble information is available here, if you need it. Otherwise, standard open thread rules apply. Let's have some fun with the absurd, fantastic, silly, awesome fake violence that is the WWE Royal Rumble.