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THE WORST POSSIBLE BASKETBALL MIX TAPE SONGS, VIA TWITTER

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Let's enjoy bad things together!

Finally, a reason to put Smashmouth on the front page of BHGP.
Finally, a reason to put Smashmouth on the front page of BHGP.
Matthew Peyton/Getty Images

So, unsurprising confession here: I enjoy basketball prospects' mixtapes on the YouTubes. Every prospect looks like a star, everyone shoots 100% (unless it's someone else missing so the highlighted player can get a rebound), the "super dunk" play gets run so often, and it's a great time. Basketball is easy when you make all the jumpers!

The other thing you can count on is a generic, royalty-free hip-hop instrumental for the soundtrack. They're ubiquitous. Observe:

So since my brain thinks bad things sometimes, I got to wondering what the worst possible song for one of these highlight reels. So I asked Twitter, and was greeted with an onslaught of truly terrible ideas, which I now share with you.

(This works on several terrible levels and is probably the "right" answer.)

(Tough but fair, Rick.)

(I got several suggestions along these lines and I'm worried about all of you now.)

(Honestly surprised there wasn't more Bette Midler in this list.)

(Jeeeesus.)

(Yeah, probably that.)

So, I don't do good video editing, but if anybody wants to set someone's highlights to one of these atrociously inappropriate soundtracks, rest assured we'll try to give it the attention it deserves.

And as always, the floor is yours for more terrible suggestions.