Like we said yesterday, because Legends and Leaders is (still) stupid and because East and West is mildly incoherent thanks to the Wisconsin-Michigan Paradox (and because jNW and Illinois are also split, I guess), but divisions still need names, dammit. Calling it The IlliBuck division doesn't mean a damn thing for the 2/3 of the teams in the division, but whatever. In any event, the season is just days away, which means it's time for us to put a marker down on who's going to win things. The contenders:
ILLINOIS
Pros: In Scheelhaase we trust. Hooray for competent assistant coaches!
Cons: Zook'd. Y U NO STAY, 2010 BEST PLAYERS?
INDIANA
Pros: #SAVEUSGUNNER. Kevin Wilson knows offense. Damarlo Belcher catches everything...
Cons: ... except when he doesn't. What's a quarterback? Defense is for other teams.
OHIO STATE
Pros: Still Ohio State. Chip, meet shoulder. Luke Fickell, cagefighter M.D.
Cons: Requiem for a Senator. Pourin' out a 40 for TPeezy. Scandal, scandal, scandal.
PENN STATE
Pros: Returning starters ahoy! Defense wins something or other. Silas Redd is running back people.
Cons: Gingers are for mocking, not quarterbacking. Offensive lines should not say "ole!"
PURDUE
Pros: Danny Hope's mustache is set to DETERMINED. Riccy-Riccy-Riccardo!
Cons: ACLOCAPYPSE NOW! What's a Caleb TerBush? OMHR.
WISCONSIN
Pros: Ball/White 2011! Russell Wilson is love. Chris Borland can fly.
Cons: The hol(e)y offensive line is missing the chosen left tackle. Where the Watt at?
Who ya got?