It's Not Plagiarism If You Link To It is BHGP's regular news roundup. Send all tips to any of the email addresses at the bottom of the page. Please tell the weather to give me a proper goddamn spring.
Caring just got (super) creepy. There's a reason we tag most recruiting stories with the "caring is creepy" label; it's creepy to care that much about the life and decisions of 17 and 18-year old kids. So what's it called when it involves a school offering a 15-year old kid? Let's just go with super-creepy for now. So which unscrupulous band of scoundrels is doing the creep? LSU? Auburn? USC? Uh, that would be... Iowa. No, really:
But on Monday, John Allen called Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz as he was advised, and Ferentz confirmed that he would like to extend a scholarship offer to Brian Allen.
"We're all kind of amazed by it," John Allen said. "I don't think it's sunk in yet. He's 15 years old. He can't drive a car yet, etc."
Brian Allen, who plays on the offensive line, needed even more convincing when his dad told him the news.
"I thought my dad was kidding at first," said Brian Allen, who has also recently received interest from Purdue and Wisconsin. "To be offered as a freshman by the University of Iowa is nuts."
Wait, what? On one hand, Allen does check off a lot of boxes on the Kirk Ferentz wishlist for offensive linemen: he's big (6'1", 250 as a freshman), he's a wrestler (3rd at 215 lbs at the Illinois State Wrestling Tournament), and he has a good pedigree (his brother, Jack, is an offensive lineman at Michigan State). On the other hand, he's fifteen. Yeah, this isn't going to stop being creepy for quite a while. And Iowa now has one more thing in common with Lane Kiffin than we ever hoped to see.
2011 schedulin'. ESPN's Adam Rittenberg breaks down Iowa's 2011 football schedule and decides that it's pretty favorable on the whole. Which, you know, it is; Iowa misses (probably) the two best teams from the Leaders division (Ohio State, Wisconsin) and gets three of the four viable contenders in the Legends division at home (Michigan, Michigan State, and just Northwestern). That said, we'd quibble with a few of his comments. He labels Iowa's "gut-check" game as Penn State, but we all know that's a lie: Iowa's real "gut-check" game is against our Armani-clad oppressors a week later. And this?
Trap game: At Purdue. This cross-division game falls after two huge divisional home games against the Michigan schools and before the much-anticipated reunion with Nebraska in Lincoln. Neither fan base sounds too excited about this as a protected rivalry, but Iowa shouldn't look past the Boilers, especially on the road.
HARRUMPH HARRUMPH. Apparently Rittenberg missed Purdue Hate Week last year. We hate Purdue. We have always hated Purdue. We will always hate Purdue.
We be rollin' (putts). As expected, the Iowa golfers are headed back to the NCAA Regionals for a third straight year, earning a 3-seed to the NCAA Regional at Wolf Run Golf Course in Zionsville, Indiana. So what's that mean?
The Hawkeyes are the third seed in the 14-team Indiana Regional and are making their third straight NCAA post-season appearance. In the latest golf rankings, Iowa is ranked 14th in the nation in Golfstat's May 4 rankings and 18th nationally in Golfweek's May 8 rankings.
The top five teams and top individual, not on a qualifying team, in each region, advance to the NCAA Championships, to be held May 31-June 5 on the Karsten Creek Golf Course in Stillwater, Okla. Alabama is the top-seeded team in the Indiana region, followed by Big Ten champion Illinois. Stanford is the fourth seed and Wake Forest is fifth. Indiana is the seven seed and Michigan is ninth.
Last year, Iowa came up just short in their bid to make the NCAA Championships, finishing 6th at the Regional. In 2009, Iowa advanced to the NCAA Championships, finishing 17th overall. Iowa's current team contains multiple players from those teams; this current squad has the experience and talent to make it back to the NCAA Championships this year, so hopefully things come together for them to do just that.
In related news, the Daily Iowan tabbed UI Golf Coach Mark Hankins as their Coach of the Year and it's hard to dispute that. In part, it's an award he wins almost by default -- Kirk Ferentz and Lisa Bluder coached teams that failed to live up to preseason expectations, Tom Brands coached a wrestling team that failed to win a Big Ten or NCAA Championship for the first time in four years, and Fran McCaffery injected enthusiasm into the basketball team, but very few wins. That said, it's not exactly fair to Hankins to say that he won it by default; he led a golf team that's developed into a steady winner (something never before done at Iowa) and has them primed for even greater success. He's done a sensational job at Iowa and he deserves every bit of commendation he receives.
It's officially gratuitous WWF week in INP. From a corner of Blogfrica we seldom visit (sorry, Vanderbros; we'll rectify that from now on) comes this stunningly awesome post profiling the most bugfuck crazy wrestler of the '80s, the Ultimate Warrior. Go, read, and bask in the crazy. In the meantime, you can also listen/watch this montage of his most insane promos:
POT ROASTZ
* Remember that blurb a few days ago about Iowa making money on the Insight Bowl? Um, not so fast, my friends.
* jNW locked up Fitzgerald the Purple with a longer, fatter contract; that'll buy a lot of magic potatoes.
* Fitzy isn't the only coach getting a contract extension; Iowa locked up women's hoops coach Lisa Bluder through 2018.
* Mike Hlas ranks the non-Kinnick Big Ten stadiums; somehow Ryan Field comes in at #5, which makes me question his sanity -- classical architecture can only carry a place so far.
* Bryce Cartwright and Matt Gatens will attempt to determine if there really is no party like an Estonian party this summer, as they join an East Coast All-Stars team (yeah, I'm not exactly sure how Iowa is on the "East Coast," but shhh) taking part in the Four Nations Cup in Tallinn, Estonia in August.
* Gus Johnson officially signed on with FOX this week, and while that's really good news if you're a fan of the Big 12, Pac 12, or C-USA (seriously), it's also good news for Big Ten fans: Gus is doing two football games on BTN this year and a whole mess of basketball games on BTN. Fingers crossed for Gus calling some Iowa games.
* Guess who appeared on The Norm MacDonald Sports Show last night? Hint: RRROOWRRR (TFJ to Joe Campbell)