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Ten Reasons Why Oregon Is The Lesser of Two Evils

(in no particular order)

10. Gene Chizik. Calling him a coach to begin with, is a stretch. He's more like the Human Resource Manager of Auburn. Which probably explains why he did not sniff Coach of The Year (Chip Kelly won it), despite taking the pre-season No. 22 team all the way to No. 1, even beating the defending champions in the process. Nope, the guy who took the No. 11 team to No. 2 won it because the award, after all, goes to a coach.

9. Agent Provocateur. Cam Newton's father acted as an agent for his son. If the pimping of his son was to professional football teams it would have been problematic. It wasn't. It was to a handful of SEC teams (of course). That's a little more than problematic.

8. Ignoble. Nick Fairley's antics speak for themselves. Losing should be his reward.

7. Derivative. Tigers is easily the most boring mascot/nickname in sports and reflects even less than zero creativity. So, quite simply, it should not be engraved on any trophy. Ever.

6. SEC. No explanation needed.

5. Brothers From Another Mother. The relationship between PAC-10 and B1G-10 is primarily due to a longstanding connection to the greatest Bowl Game played. It isn't much, but it's enough for Monday night.

4. Infractions. Only SMU has been slapped down by the NCAA more than Auburn. At this point, should they even be allowed to be a member any longer?

3. Malzahn. Name one Gus in sports history that has been worthy of your support? Gus Grissom was cool though.

2. No offense, but you got no defense. It's embarrassing that a major championship will feature a team that thinks playing defense is an unfortunate condition of the game.

1. Nike is slightly less evil than Bobby Lowder. At least within the contest of college football.