- Coach McCaffery's office, Carver Hawkeye Arena -
Stokes and Basabe are in. Marble and McCabe are staying put. That leaves us two scholarships to fill.
We only have a few weeks left, and we need a guard. Maybe another big.
Bowen, you know anyone we should be looking to get?
I used to play with this guy named Tracy McGrady who never went to college. Maybe we could get him.
I'm pretty sure that's not how it works.
And then there was this tall Chinese dude who
I HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD THEY COUNSEL ME THEY UNDERSTAND THEY TALK TO ME
/walks slowly into office
/I mean, really slowly
Um, Matt? Can I help you?
You hired your assistants without consulting me first!
Well, yes. Yes, I hired my staff in consultation with Gary Ba...
I demand an apology! I have earned the right to be in these meetings!
I have to respectfully disagree with you, Matt. You're a pretty good shooting guard, but...
I make you millions of dollars. People pay to see me and not any of you. You might not want to admit this, but I'm the best thing you've got.
I have brought Devyn Marble and Darius Stokes with me. We represent the purest bloodline in Iowa sports. We are the thoroughbreds. We are the privileged few. We...are...Legacy.
OK, Matt? I think you've been watching too much WWE.
Need I remind you what I did to the last coach, Mr. McMahon?
He tried to have me fired, so I
I'm pretty sure none of that happened.
Well, figuratively speaking.
I want you to bring back Anthony Tucker. I want you to hire your graduate assistant in consultation with me. I want to be in on all coaches' meetings. Do this...or else.
Or else what, Matt?
YOU CAN'T SEE ME MY TIME IS NOW
/salutes nobody in particular
/starts bouncing back and forth against the walls
/throws baseball cap off Kirk Speraw's head
Good morning, Eric. Something I can help you...
Seems to me you've been doing a lot of talking, Matt. Making a lot of demands, Matt. Running your mouth a little too much, if you ask me.
You say you make this program millions of dollars? Well, last I saw, these fans and the WWE Universe were wearing MY shirts! And chanting MY name!
CEEE-NUHHH! CEEE-NUHHH! CEE-NUHHH!
/glares at his new video coordinator
Don't you forget, Gatens, that I AM THE WWE CHAMPION AND I WILL MAKE YOU TAP OUT
IT'S ALL ABOUT THE GAME AND HOW YOU PLAY IT ALL ABOUT CONTROL AND IF YOU CAN TAKE IT
Oh no. Cully? Not you too.
/looks at ground
/pours water on head
/spits water all over Andrew Francis
It seems to me if you're talking about the WWE Title, you probably shouldn't leave out the 12-time world champion! I am The Game! The King of Kings! I am Triple
HEY U GUYZ WUT R U DUIN
Matt and Eric are playing wrestlers
Guys, really, can't you do this at...
OOH OOH I WANNA PLAY 2
WHO M I WATCH THIS
/kicks Gatens in the shin
/climbs on top of desk
/makes X gesture over crotch
Wait, are you guys playing wrestlers? I wanna be Stone Cold because that's the bottom line because Stone Cold said
Brommer, you're The Great Khali. You are huge, you only play for about 2 minutes a night, you hurt everyone on accident
This is going to take forever.