We haven't seen a buddy comedy this potent since Heat Wave and Jack: It's spring, which means it's I-Club tour time. For those few unfamiliar, the I-Club is a group of Hawkeye boosters, and there are chapters scattered all across Iowa as well as strategic locations nationwide (Chicago, Minneapolis, the Pentagon, etc.). So twice a year, coaches and other Iowa officials travel to these clubs' meetings to brief these faithful donors on the goings-on with their sports. Standard stuff, really, and perhaps not even meriting a mention--except for what Kirk Ferentz told the Cedar Rapids Rotary Club yesterday:
Morehouse (who else?) has five more videos posted at his site from the visit, and while none of them are exactly earth-shattering, we know by now that that's not Ferentz's M.O. to begin with anyway. He's not about to call Jim Tressel an underhanded snotweasel or accuse Tim Brewster of committing recruiting violations by not telling the kids that MInnesota actually sucks, after all. But he is a guy that's at least interesting to listen to, so do so if you've got a spare 20 minutes.
But back to the point at hand: Norm Parker and Tom Brands, on the I-Club circuit together. We'd write up a dialogue for it, but it would probably be just this over and over:
TELL ME ABOUT TATE FORCIER
KNOCKED HIS DICK CLEAN OFF
HAHAHAHAHA YEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
(does pushups in his suit)
(does donuts in his Hoveround)
If caring about recruiting is creepy, call us Miles Davis: Iowa football picked up its third commitment of the 2011 class by securing a verbal from Austin Blythe, who we're grateful to report is not related to former Cyclone (and current waitress destroyer) Todd Blythe. He may, however, be related to Jaws from the Bond movies:
This, of course, is a good thing, as Jaws was fucking fierce. Here's more from the P-C on Blythe's commit:
The Williamsburg star lineman didn't want to waste his time or anyone else's when he knew he was inevitably going to Iowa. Thus, Blythe committed to the Hawkeyes on Monday, selecting Iowa over scholarship offers from Wisconsin, Stanford, Iowa State, Kansas and Kansas State.
"I just don't see myself going anywhere else," said Blythe, who is ranked by Rivals.com as the top prospect in the state in the Class of 2011. "I don't think I need to take more time to make the decision, and I don't want to tell other coaches that I want to visit, I'm interested when I really had my heart set.
"I know other coaches just go out and get the next guy, and I want to give those coaches the respect they deserve just by telling them that I'm very honored that (you have) offered me, but (Iowa) is where I want to go."
So that's all very good. Blythe, as you've surmised from the picture, is a big boy; he goes about 9′ 8″, 790 pounds is listed at 6'3", 280, and is a highly decorated wrestler. We're thinking free safety. That or field hockey goalie.
BRIEF ITEMZ OF INTEREST
Devan Bawinkel was given the Chris Street Award at Iowa's annual banquet this weekend, according to John Bohnenkamp. Down here in Indianola, residents politely disagreed.
Brian Ferentz is an assistant coach for the Patriots, and he is working with the tight ends, but he is not the tight ends coach. If this makes no sense to you, you have never heard of Bill Belichick.
Ricky Stanzi is working on cutting down on his interceptions, according to Rittenberg at ESPN; this strikes us as a dangerous idea. Sure, they're awful for the team and making him throw fewer seems like a good idea, but... well, Stone Temple Pilots sucked once Scott Weiland got off the heroin, you know?
And finally, as Iowans, we wholly approve of your whip of choice, sir.