I can't believe that Paterno won't do business with me just because I'm Irish. I'm not even Irish! I'm Samoan or something! I can try to take Stanzi down alone again...but no, that won't work. I need JoePa, damn it! Maybe I can scare the old bastard into helping me. Yeah, that might wo...
FREEZE
ARF ARF /fires warning shot over PAKISTANZI's head The jig is up, PAKISTANZI!
That's Pah-kee-stahnzi. What was that? You're pronouncing it incorrectly. It's Pah-kee-stahnzi, with more of an "ah" sound on the A's. Oh. Thanks, President Obama! Haters gonna hate. Wait, where did he go?
There he is, running into Beaver Stadium Beaver Stadium LOL LOL LOL Let's get him!
-- Five minutes later, in the basement of Beaver Stadium --
I don't see him I don't either We might be lost I can't believe we're lost in Beaver Stadium Beaver Stadium LOL LOL LOL RARFL
TROLOLOLOLO Yeah, LO wait, what did you say? TROLOLOLOLO /opens polyester jacket to show pistol Let's golololololo
-- Basement of Beaver Stadium LOL, in a holding cell usually inhabited by KevinHD --
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT! YOU WERE SO DISTRACTED BY THE NAME OF THE STADIUM THAT YOU COMPLETELY MISSED A RUSSIAN GUY IN A CHEAP POLYESTER SUIT SNEAK UP BEHIND YOU! THAT WASN'T EVEN A REAL GUN! HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!
/shows metric ruler painted silver I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GOT LOST IN A FOOTBALL STADIUM! IT'S JUST A BIG BOWL OF CONCRETE, NOT A HOUSE OF MIRRORS! /points to Clayborn Don't talk to this guy about Mears AMIRITE! REALLY, WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO LEARN NOT TO FOLLOW ME INTO BASEMENTS? NOW I CAN SCARE JOEPA INTO HELPING ME DESTROY STANZI ONCE AND FOR ALL! MY PLAN IS COMPLETE! THE TRAP HAS BEEN SET! I JUST NEED A NEW DISGUISE. /puts on mask NO LONGER AM I PAKI O'MEARA! NO LONGER AM I PAKISTANZI! NOW I AM...
...CLAYBO'MEARA!