As part of the Big Ten Bloggeurs, we're often given Roundtables, assignments to fill out, questions about our team, etc. Usually we blow them off, because whatevs, Trevs.
But we've been tabbed to actually give out the questions this week, so that's pretty neat, and after our first draft was rejected on account of containing "questions" like "BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS," we put our heads together for days and cranked out these zingers. But first, the despondent respondents:
The Only Game That Matters (Scrabble Big 10)
The Hoosier Report (Gene Hackman Indiana)
Maize n Brew (Michigan)
Maize and Blue Nation (no it isn't) (Michigan)
Varsity Blue (Michigan)
Ground Zero East Lansing (we can only hope) (Michigan State)
The Daily Gopher (Minnesota)
Lake The Posts (North the Western)
Buckeye Battle Cry (Duke Ohio State)
Our Honor Defend (Ohio State)
Zombie Nation (voting for Reagan again) (Penn State)
Happy Hour Valley (Penn State)
The Nittany Line (Penn State)
Boiled Sports (I prefer sauteed) (Purdue)
Off The Tracks (killing 12) (Purdue)
Onto the questions!
1. Week 1's in the books. What surprised you about your team? Are you optimistic? Disappointed? (NOTE: Purdue does not apply here, so these fans must talk about Wake Forest instead)
Credit first goes to both Purdue blogs, who did indeed talk about Wake Forest. Boiled Sports asked if we were surprised that they did so. No, I'm not surprised you did what I told you to do. You'd have been put to death otherwise.
There were but a scant few optimistic fans, however, namely ZN, LTP, and HHV. That's about it.
2. Beanie Wells' foot is definitely the top story in the conference. What's #2?
BS: "Poop is number 2." Someone got it.
G0EL, who probably took his acronym from a license plate, says "it's easily Michigan's failure to put up any semblance of a sustained offensive attack against Utah." Sure it is. Varsity Blue counters that it's "the early start to the tanking by Michigan State that is as inevitable as death and taxes." Easy, children. TDG says "the win on Saturday night was the Gophers’ first fourth-quarter game-winning touchdown since Nov. 18, 2000," making me think he doesn't know there are 10 other BXI teams. Your winner is Hoosier Report: "Juice Williams passed for 450 yards. I didn't think he could do that even in practice."
3. Admit it: you loathe DickFraudROFL (né Rich Rodriguez), but when Michigan scored that last touchdown, you were rooting for them to make the 2-pt. conversion.
Some people aren't ready to cheer for plucky little Michigan quite yet, it seems. Hoosier Report will "admit to no such thing." Boiled Sports "was happy to see them lose in their home stadium." And OHD, unsurprisingly, places the blame where it really matters: "I wasn’t surprised Rich Rod dropped the ball though."
But aside from the Michicentric blogs, the world hasn't entirely turned and left the Wolverines here. LTP "root[s] for every Big Ten team to win every non-conference game." Zombie Nation "hate[s] when any Big Ten team loses out of conference." And we love the little bastards too. It's cute to watch them go 5-7.
4. Is this weekend's slate of games actually less interesting than last week's?
I forgot to mention that I was referring to the Big Ten slate, which is really one of the saddest sights in major conference sports, the Big East in its entirety aside. OHD admits "most of the Big Ten-related games aren’t interesting," and Maize n Brew takes it one step further: "This weekend schedule is a crime against football. There isn't a single game worth watching." Sir, Iowa vs. FIU. Please.
5. Don't you hate pants?
This question induced some worthwhile YouTubes. Look at the YouTubes!
TOGTM, you want to bring this one home? "Fuck pants. I'm never wearing them again."