I have no idea. Seriously. Whose loss was the worst?
- Oklahoma flat-out blew it. The game was in their pocket and they gave up 17 4th quarter points to the Hawk. For some reason, Stoops has folded at least one inexplicable loss per season into his schedule. This pleases me to no end.
- Oregon lost to a really good Cal team, at home, largely sealing their fate by fumbling the ball out of the end zone from inside the 2 yard line. It wasn't a loss to an inferior opponent, but it was still a ballbuster. Was it worse than Oklahoma's loss?
- Florida lost to Auburn's kicker. I fucking hate kickers. I think it should be illegal to attempt a field goal in the final minute of a game. Or, if you do, the ball has to be on fire, or covered in sheep's blood. I know Urb is an offensive genius (this term has now been watered down thanks to the likes of Brian Billick and Andy Reid) and all, but running Tebow up the middle loses it's "wow factor" when you do it 46 times in 2 games. Let's mix it up, shall we?
- Texas took one on the chin. They got manhandled on both sides of the ball by a spunky (ewewewewewwwww) Kansas State squad. Was it a surprise? No. Texas has been sleepwalking through their games all season but you still don't expect a Mack Brown team to get their ass whipped by Towelie like that. I don't see them responding well to this loss either. I think the Longhorns finish this season on their knees.
My point is, there are no good losses, they all suck. Trying to compare one loss to the next is beyond my grasp, so I dropped everyone who lost like a rock. Is Missouri better than Florida? Probably not, but all they can do is play the teams on their schedule and win, which they've done, so I'll judge them on that. If Florida comes out and beats LSU this week (and I think they will) they'll be expedited back to the top 5. The week after a loss tells me more about a team than anything else. Last week was delicious but this week will tell us who's going to be around at the end of the season.
Finally, Kentucky @ South Carolina on Thursday night is going to be epic. Whomever wins that game has a free pass into the top 3. Oh, the humanity!*
* Kentucky Head Coach Rich Brooks was chief engineer in the construction of the Hindenburg. The design was based on his wife Karen's pendulous breasts. Throughout construction there was much controversy from the engineering community about the ridiculous size and veiny texture of the mighty Zeppelin, but Brooks would listen to criticisms from no man. Brooks was actually scheduled to fly the bulbous craft into Manchester Township, NJ the day of the fateful deflation, but just prior to launch, he turned in his wings in a contract dispute when he learned that the LZ 129 Hindenburg's lesser known, and slightly smaller, sister craft, the LZ 130 would not in fact be named Das Boob. It was the end of aircraft design for Brooks and soon thereafter he went into coaching.