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Fuck. This is not what I needed to see today. Many of you may remember Amari Spievey as a highly touted recruit for the Hawkeyes in the fall of 2006. He was having a little trouble with the books [read that: did not go to class, at all] and he was homesick [read that: cried himself to sleep every night missin' his Moms] so we shipped him off to Iowa Central (as we did with Clinton Soloman) to get his head straight.

Well, guess what? He's doing just that. He's excelling in the classroom and starring on the football field. I should warn you before you read the article. There's some stuff in there that's hard to look at. Like this quote directly from Spievey:

‘‘I want to follow through and get back to Iowa. It’s my dream,’’ he said.

And that's not all. Iowa Central coach Kevin Twait has some pointed words as well:

‘‘Obviously, we are the beneficiary of a strong relationship with (the) Iowa (football program). Amari’s situation is very similar to Clinton’s. He’s here to make academic progress. Iowa is very interested in making sure things are going well in the classroom and socially for him.

"As a football player, he’s among the top two or three players I’ve coached here in 12 years.’’

Just when you thought it couldn't get worse; I guess this kid loves him momma too:

‘‘I’d like to get a (NFL) contract and take care of my mom,’’ he said. Then he quickly added, ‘‘a degree would be good too.’’

This sucks. It really, really sucks. After what we've been through this year, I'm just sitting here waiting for the police report and/or scandal, wondering what this chucklehead will do to humiliate himself and the Hawkeyes. The possibilites are endless but here are some feats that haven't been accomplished (yet) by any current players:

  • Jack an ambulance and run over a nun's foot while fleeing a taffy store robbery.
  • Post pictures on Friendster of himself and his Amish roommate playing Sega Genesis while dressed as Mario & Luigi.
  • Empty a Madden-esque bowel blast unto his female R.A.'s laundry receptacle (ala Najeh Dumpenport)... the crime? The liberated grub was consumed on a dine & dash from Fazoli's.
  • Three Billy Goat's Muff: Charged with orally raping 2 bitch nanny goats and (inadvertently) a male as well.
  • A Murder Most Fowl: He will fashion a knife out of a duck and stab five homeless children to death.

The ball is in your court, Spievey. Make us unproud.