Rumors had been flying all week that Tony Freeman--you know, that guy that led Iowa in scoring in eight of his twenty games played--was on his way out. The UI made it official tonight, announcing that Freeman will be released from his scholarship. He'll be completing his collegiate career elsewhere, the story says, and we're anxiously awaiting word on where that'll be. High-major school? Possible, but it's doubtful he'd start; why transfer out of a sure starting role for your senior season just to sit out for a year, then play 10 minutes a game at Marquette or some shit? Mid-major, most likely, but Freeman cannot actually think that playing at IUPUI will be better than at Iowa. C'mon.
The transfer rumors had begun earlier this week, after an assistant told the Linn County I-Club that the captains for the 2008-2009 season were Cyrus Tate and Jarryd Cole. Two guys who play the same position, and one guy who is much younger than Freeman. Freeman gave some tepid answers when pressed for comment, then said he "should be" at Iowa next year, which is code for "peace bitches." Nice work by Randy Peterson, marking the first time since the Big Peach era that Register sportswriting has been noteworthy. In a positive sense, anyway.
We'll sort of miss Freeman. Well, Jebus won't. And I probably won't. And HS probably won't. So let me amend my previous statement: Thank you for spending all of last season knocking down three-pointers when Iowa was hopelessly behind, Freeman. Your ability to create massive amounts of turnovers from thin air (The stats say 71, creating a "perfect 1:1" A/T ratio, but we could swear he coughed it up roughly 14 times per game) was at once astonishing and maddening. Also, we're pretty sure you were the reason Todd Lickliter did this all the time:
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, or failing that, a failsafe place to hide Tony Freeman's body.
The wild card is incoming recruit Anthony Tucker, who will probably be pressed into duty at the point. You can judge for yourself if you think he's capable of doing so by watching this highlight reel from Rivals, but we're not terribly optimistic. His jumper is outstanding, but you can't seriously watch that and tell us he's capable of consistently facing a press at the BXI level. No way.
But we digress. Tony Freeman, going the way of the dirigible and Dan Bohall. Godspeed, you offense-wrecking lunatic. We'll always have our below-average photoshops of you.
If you missed the game, go here: PlayOn Sports, click on the Iowa Spring Game button (don't worry, it's all free), and watch the proceedings. As near as I can tell, it's the audio feed from the radio on top of the visuals from the big screen at the stadium (hence the plugs for, like, Iowa baseball). A couple quick observations--McNutt needs a lot of work, Stanzi needs a lot less, and Christensen's grasp on the starting spot is, uh, tenuous.
Also, the linebackers look great, the offensive line doesn't, and Paki O'Meara is, shockingly, not the answer at tailback.
If you went to the game, by all means, leave some thoughts in the comments, and we'll be going position-by-position over the next couple of days. In the mean time, time to return to the DL as I fight off a nasty head cold the only way I know how-- Tylenol Orange and that Purple Drank, lawya.
It's no secret that Iowa's backfield is a concern for 2008. Only one scholarship tailback is on campus right now--juco transfer and confirmed Mightymouse Nate Guillory--so it stands to reason that he should be, at least until the other incoming tailbacks show up, the prohibitive starter. Right?
IOWA CITY — Let’s hope you weren’t holding out hope for some big news from Kirk Ferentz’s Wednesday news conference that would make you feel better about Iowa’s running back situation.
It looks as if the starter for now might be Paki O’Meara.
I'm Paki O'Meara!
Our horror cup overfloweth. The good news is that O'Meara is the early leader for the J Leman Memorial Best Mugshot On A Starting Big 10 Player award, heretofore only given to J Leman, because J Leman.
Don't worry, America loves J Leman right back.
I digress. Luckily, the QC Times dispatched notable sourpuss Dan Doxsie to opine on the recent development, because when you've got to deliver horrible, bad, awful news, you may as well do it with a wry grin. Takes attention away from the tears, you know.
The sophomore walk-on from Cedar Rapids Washington, who never has carried the ball in a college game, received this ringing endorsement from Ferentz: “If we have to go with him in the fall, we will.’’
A few seconds later he piled on even more praise: “Obviously, we’re hoping we’ll be able to supplement him with other players in the fall.’’
The entire article is solid stuff, if a bit hater-y. We never like the pessimists, but we might as well be honest--if Iowa goes down in a Hindenburg-like mess of flames in 2008, we hope Dan Doxsie is there in the blazing canopy wth us, pointing out that it's not the heat, it's the humanity.
When I say "worst tournament ever," of course, I'm not talking about BHGP Bracket Madness, which is hard charging like an unstoppable demon train as we speak. I mean the Big Ten Tourney, which is currently halfway through the second day of this rotten iteration.
Yesterday, we were treated to three completely awful exhibitions of basketball. The day's first travesty was Michigan against Iowa, two teams that combined to accomplish precisely dick this year. The Wolverines, a team with a season-long pattern of poor rebounding and defense, destroyed the Hawks on the boards in the first half and forced 8 turnovers to Iowa's 3 assists. The two teams slogged their way to a 34-25 halftime score.
And that was the good half.
The second half set basketball as we know it back several decades. Michigan went over 10 minutes without scoring a single point. Iowa countered by mustering only seven points, all from the foul line, during the time span. Between the 15:50 and 4:07 marks, neither team scored a single basket.
Iowa ended up with four assists to 14 turnovers, which is enough to get you shot in Russia. Remember the Iraq war, when Baghdad Bob claimed that American soldiers were committing suicide by the hundreds? That was actually happening inside Conseco Fieldhouse. Then Fox News sent Geraldo to the scene, and this is what he found:
LET THEM GO!
I don't know what he was talking about in the second half of that clip when he talks about "New Orleans" and "Katrina" because that all definitely happened yesterday in Indianapolis. Final was 55-47, Michigan.
So that was just the first game. In game 2, Illinois and Penn State scorched the twines and both teams scored literally over 60 points--each! Illinois shot 21-50, and while a 42% shooting percentage looks bad, it just so happens to be the best team shooting performance of the entire tournament thus far. The Illini won in the closing seconds, 64-63, and Indianapolis was declared a federal disaster area.
The "nightcap" featured Minnesota and Northwestern. Northwestern is the worst BXI team in decades. There's no other way to put it. They are where decent basketball goes to die. They were facing the worst 18-12 team in BXI history, Minnesota. The Gophers have the distinction of being a power conference team with a winning percentage of .600 or better, and still not being in the Top 100 of the RPI. Remember when I said they've beaten nobody? No? Well, they've beaten nobody. Here's an exhaustive list of the teams with winning records that Minnesota has beaten this season:
Ohio State
North Dakota State
That's all. No, seriously, that's every one of them. And by the way, not only is NDSU ineligible for postseason play on account of being a provisional Division 1 member, but they're the lowest-ranked team with a winning record in the RPI--#195.
So when the Gophers took the court against Northwestern, the 10,000 fans who were forced to attend the game, presumably to fill obligations of community service as terms of their probation, were filled with dread, and for good reason. Minnesota spent the entire first half blindfolded and ballgagged as Northwestern staked a 34-21 lead at the break. Northwestern. Naturally, the Wildcats were unwilling to be usurped from their throne of thrown games, so they tanked it in the second half and allowed the Gophers to climb back and "win," 55-52. Honestly, there are no winners in play here.
Ever seen a guy get blocked by the rim before? Now you have!
After those three abominations of sport, the conference trudged ahead, eagerly anticipating FOUR! Not just three, but four! games on tap for today. The first was Michigan, victors valiant over a Hawkeye team that might not beat its female counterpart in a regulation game, against mighty Wisconsin. The Badgers have an uncommon ability to turn every single ballgame they play into a nasty, ugly, unwatchable affair. Think if Hillary and Michelle Malkin were running against each other. Or Karl Rove and Bruce Bowen. That's what Wisconsin does. Their contest against Michigan, then, was absolutely no surprise in this regard--the Wolverines were held to 10-50 shooting on the day, including just 4-26 from inside the arc. Naturally, with such ferocious defense, there's also the concurrent tradition of the refs swallowing their whistles--nobody on Wisconsin even picked up four fouls, to say nothing of fouling out. All mere coincidence, I'm sure.
The second game of the day, an afternoon match between Ohio State and Michigan State, is the first of the five played thus far that hasn't involved a team with a losing record. Neato Cheeto Ranch Dorito, a game with winners! But again, there are no winners here. While the gameplay was, for once, tolerable, it wasn't very interesting. Ohio State led at exactly one point in the game, 32-30 on the first basket of the second half, then immediately allowed Michigan State to take the lead for good. Both teams were characteristically cold from the field--is there a crossbreeze at Conseco or something? Sparty's jumper was atrocious today, as Raymar Morgan and Kalin Lewis combined to shoot 7-27 from the field. Luckily, Drew Neitzel bailed MSU out with 28, including six threes; he was the only Spartan with double digits on the day. 67-60, in the highest scoring game of the first half of the tournament, is your merciful final.
Later tonight, we have 14-18 Illinois facing Purdue, then Minnesota against Indiana to finish the night off. Are we liveblogging them? Fuck no we're not. We can't do it to ourselves, much less to you, dear readers. Don't watch them. Do anything else. Go outside. Masturbate to old pornography with the untamed pubic hair. Read a book. Watch anime on YouTube, especially if you also have weed. Do anything but watch the BXI Tourney. We're begging you.
Forget George Bush, Hannah Montana, Oprah, and DMX; there is only one ruler of the entire universe. That is MOTO: Master Of The Obvious. The current monarch of the MOTO Universe is none other than outgoing Iowa tailback Albert Young, who broke it down in achingly obvious terms for the Des Moines Register:
"Things definitely have gotten out of hand. There is no way around it," Young said. "And it started happening even before the season."
worse:
"The coaches preach the right things. There is no reason players shouldn't know right from wrong, so if people are blaming the coaches or the university - that's just not right," Young said. "I am not going to name names, but I have seen guys act one way on their recruiting visit, then act a whole other way once they get here and start school. How can you predict that? You can't. It is not only happening at Iowa. I am sure it is happening all over the country."
Yes, the Register is a Gannett-owned shitrag, but AY has a point here. Isn't it insanely obvious that, uh, something's really wrong here?
Now, to be fair, a coach needs to be more proactive than, let's say Stan and Kyle from South Park, who just say "oh goddammit" whenever something dumb happens and it counts as biting social commentary. And Kirk Ferentz has been heavy-handed with both his reactionary discipline and his prevention program (he has, somehow, imposed a 12-day-a-week curfew). So like AY said, he's probably not the one to point the finger at. Still... what the hell? Name one other university where the star running back is compelled to cast aspersions against the state of legal affairs among the players.
Anyway, we thank AY for his candor, even as we bemoan the circumstances that warrant it. We just hope that the criminal element doesn't infect Casey McMillan, because the last thing this city needs is a raging hateboulder throwing a cop car at an elementary school.
Let's get the bad news out of the way right now: WR James Cleveland, two counts of misdemeanor drug possession, one felony count of tax stamp violation.* QB Arvell Nelson, possession of marijuana. Both are, in all likelihood, gone, gone, motherfucking gone.Via the Great Gazoo:
According to police reports, University of Iowa public safety officers found marijuana in plain view on top of Nelson's desk at 2:41 a.m. Nelson admitted the marijuana was his, according to the complaint.
At 3:01 a.m., Cleveland consented to a search of his room, according to the complaint. Police founds 21 units of oxycodone and 24 does of carisoprodol in his desk. Cleveland admitted the pills — for which a label or prescription was not found — were his, according to the complaint. Oxycodone usually is prescribed for pain relief, while carisoprodol is a muscle relaxer.
If you were curious about whether we'd had any warning signs of the bad behavior, why yes, we did. Remember the facebook picture fiasco from last fall? These two guys sure do; they were there! Here they are, posing with Head Retard In Charge Dominique Douglas:
KEEP IT REAL
aaaand
DALE JUNIOR WHAT
If the allegations are true (and based on the police report, that sounds prohibitively likely), then they should be fed to bears. That's probably not the direction that Ferentz will take in this matter, sadly, but we can't be sure yet. We can't be sure because he can't be reached, on account of being on a motherfucking cruise. (Sailboat Bill completely approves, by the way.)
*The tax stamp law is complete and total horseshit, by the way, but the lesson is still the same: do not fucking sell drugs.
It's time for VENGEANCE. No, not you assclowns. Go away.
Iowa visits East Lansing today, a place where the Hawkeyes haven't won since 1993. Fa real. The Spartans have all sorts of reasons why they should win, namely:
They're far better than Iowa at basketball;
Izzo stands to win his 300th game today;
cold, brutal revenge.
This won't be close, and we're perfectly aware of that, thank you. We just hope Iowa can keep the deficit to double digits. Be sure to keep your browsers pointed right hyeah as we suffer in the best way possible: together.
Last night was a major regression for the Hawkeyes. Granted, Indiana was playing well enough that no amount of poise would have helped, but holy lord was that awful.
Indiana held Iowa to 17 points and a bricktastic 21% shooting percentage in the second half, and their final 22-point margin was their largest of the game. Kelvin Sanctions, apparently determined not to repeat Iowa's furious comeback from last month (yeah, like that was going to happen again), didn't clear the bench until 1:05 remained. Apparently A.J. Ratliff tossing threes at the bucket was what Indiana needed. Just like Drew Neitzel shooting from downtown with a 74-37 lead and six minutes left last year, we hope Iowa remembers that complete slap in the face and exacts their revenge on the Hoosiers soon. It'll be sweet.
Actually, the highlight of the game didn't happen until far after the whistle sounded, when whoever's in charge of the official Hakweyes site redefined spin as we know it.
Boy, I bet Indiana's embarrassed they had to "storm back" like that!
(For the second time in as many weeks, a giant HT to storminspank, the fourth-best source for Hawkeye multimedia and specialized fetish JPGs.)
One of the most rewarding aspects of art appreciation comes from studying its history. What's a spread option without the Delaware Wing-T? What's Led Zeppelin without Howlin' Wolf? What's Cloverfield without Godzilla?
So pay special attention to the following clips from this promotional album, circa December 1981, promoting Iowa's Rose Bowl berth. The band is called "The Fabulous Fryers," which is ostensibly a play on Hayden Fry's name*, and they suck.
Rest assured, we are all justified in lamenting Iowa's mauling at Ohio State's hands two nights ago, even if Evan Turner ran back onto the court after the starters had been pulled (seriously, dick move).
But do not, not for one second, consider this last game "rock bottom." Or if you do, you must acknowledge that there is a level lower than rock, which is either molten earth core or Hell, depending on what invisible man you offer things to.
And in that bowel of the earth resides St. Louis's basketball team, which slogged so poorly through a game last night that they made the Hawkeyes look downright competent by comparison. Complain if you must about watching Iowa on the business end of a 44-12 run, but be so thankful you were not subject to the eye-scalding horror that is scoring one point in 18 minutes of gameplay.
There are a litany of details about this performance, and as befits a shot clock era record of futility, all are horrifying. They shot 7-48 from the field, and 1-19 from behind the arc. They missed 24 straight shots over the course of 54 minutes. Like, actual minutes, not game minutes. The basket that broke the streak came on a putback after an airball. Hell, they even missed half their free throws.
All in all, it's at least nice to see a situation where we can use the word "explosive" to describe the Hawkeyes without the word "diarrhea" following immediately afterward.
Our beloved Hawkeyes, as you're likely aware, lost in a 79-48 squeaker last night. It's a) sad and b) completely accurate to point out that the game wasn't nearly as close as the final margin indicates; Ohio State went on a 44-12 run, if you can call it that, to turn an 18-14 game into a 62-26 shitstomping. The staple of Ohio State's play was a devastating 1-2-2 press zone that forced Iowa into nine first half turnovers; during the same time frame, the Buckeyes committed nary a one.
Again, while there's no way we'll be doing any research on it [laaaaazy. --ed.] there can't have been very many games--like, ever--where Iowa has spent nearly 20 minutes straight getting doubled up.
As we sort of saw coming, Ohio State's starters didn't play much; they combined for just a hair over half the minutes played, and they left the game en masse with 15:39 remaining (Evan Turner eventually came back in for a few more minutes, because Evan Turner is a dick).
What's troubling is the chorus of post-game comments, from both Lickliter and his charges. All of them, both last night and throughout the course of the year, have focused on "not executing." Technically, I'm sure that's true. What worries me is that it's awfully reminiscent of the unending cacophony, again from coaches and players, of "lacking mental toughness" during the [name redacted] era.
Granted, I'd rather have things the way they are now, as the coaches focus their comments on the players' actual play and not their steely resolve or whatever. Also, I suppose there's no good way to spin this situation through quotes; even if the blindingly obvious answer to "why did you lose" is "because we are young, unathletic, and bad at sports," neither the coach nor the players can be saying that out loud.
Still, I do worry that when Iowa fields a team that is so completely overmatched as it was last night, the players spend the whole time blaming themselves afterwards. The context in which they do so seems almost irrelevant when the coach and his system are, just like last year, being held above reproach.
Just because Freeman's foot healed doesn't make him any less gimpy.
Sado-masochistic Hawkeye fans, take heed: tonight is the first of many where you will find yourself watching the Big Ten Network, sobbing from the pain of jumper cables attached to your nipples, and fully aroused. The ambience will be complemented perfectly by the Iowa basketball team, who are set to begin an 18-game stretch of futility never before seen in program history.
For as unremarkable as Iowa's program history is, they've never, ever lost more than 16 games in a season. Sure, they didn't start playing 25 games a year until the mid-70's, but about the worst season you'll ever find is '89-'90, when they went 12-16 (4-14). This year will, um, probably sink below that.
Yes, the conference season starts tonight, and that includes the Hawkeyes hosting #13 Indiana at 8:05 on the BTN.
The Hoosier Report has a nice writeup on the game as well as on the state of the Iowa program (which is about as grisly as the last half of Hostel, but you knew that), so give them a quick perusal.
Any predictions? I'm thinking Indiana wins by about 300 points.
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