Michigan AD "Sailboat" Vito Corleone

Probably the best quote from the Rodriguez hire, courtesy of high school spread quarterback du jour Terrelle Pryor:

"I just spoke to Coach Rodriguez about ten minutes ago and he told me he is going to Michigan," Pryor explained. "He said they made him an offer an he can't refuse it."

I think we know how this went down.  Martin went to visit Rodriguez, and offered him the job for $10,000, but Rodriguez said no.  So the next day, Martin went back, only this time with Lloyd Carr.  Lloyd held a gun to Rodriguez's head, and Martin assured him either his signature or his brains would be on the contract.  Rodriguez is now coaching Michigan for $1000.

That, or Rodriguez woke up to find Owen Schmidt's severed head in his bed.