The two-deeps used in these mid-conference audits are taken directly from The Gazette's Marc Morehouse, whose fine On Iowa blog is a fixture on our RSS readers.

IOWA OFFENSE

WR — DJK, Stross

Well, this is a good place to start. DJK's 2008 has been pretty meh, actually, and while it seems pretty obvious that Stross' legendary speed is gone and never coming back, he's turned into one hell of a possession receiver; his hands are probably the best on the team. DJK is physically capable of making plays that nobody else in the WR corps can make, but he hasn't put it all together for a dominant game since, like, Northwestern 2007. If there was an unsafe starting job on the offense at this point (Kuempel aside), this is it.

LT — Bulaga, Kuempel

Good jesus, Bryan Bulaga. The word on him in summer camp even as a true freshman was that he was a mean, nasty blocker. But nobody could have anticipated the total domination he has put on opposing defensive lines. He regularly plants defenders 10 yards past the line of scrimmage, and it is simply no exaggeration to say he deserves All-American consideration.

LG — Vandervelde/Eubanks, Gettis

Continue reading this post »

So, the Big Ten schedule is starting. That's big news, folks, big news. At least that's what I have to tell myself tonight, anyway.

My ho-hummery stems from one simple fact about the game--it's just Northwestern. They're the Rain Man of Big Ten football--unusually smart, probably too inept to live alone or wear shoes without Velcro. A Northwestern player is great if you want to learn how to program your TI-85, but fucking miserable on the gridiron.

Northwestern is led by Pat Fitzgerald, an absolute fraud of a coach. Fitzgerald is the Trig Palin of Big Ten coaches: impossibly young for the center stage, a result of unexpected catastrophe, and severely retarded.

Fitzgerald is best known for being the Big Ten's youngest coach since 1917, when following a lost bet, the Michigan Wolverines were coached for one week by seven-year-old Hamilton Wiltonwood. They won by 83 points. In addition, Fitzgerald coached the entire month of October 2006 without pants, resulting in a crippling four-game skid. Wait, did we say "crippling"? This is just Northwestern, so we meant "annual."

The Wildcat quarterback is C.J. Bacher (Bacher, of course, is French for "frightened rabbit"). Bacher is coming off a 19 TD, 19 INT season and is once again not expected to contend for any meaningful postseason honors. Bacher's production is suffering in 2008 largely due to sore fingers; his injury is no surprise, as the human hand is not designed to spend three hours every Saturday with its thumb up its owner's posterior.

At tailback, Northwestern boasts Tyrell Sutton, easily one of the three best tailbacks in the nation conference state local area (ETHS has a couple burners). Sutton, not understanding the definition of a tautology, announced that he was 100% on account of his self-diagnosis of 100%. Because hamstring injuries totally disappear in seven days, you know.

Northwestern's wide receivers are six frat brothers playing a cruel prank on Fitzgerald. You'll know I'm right when Bacher throws to a receiver named "Bonestick" wearing #69.

The Northwestern wide receivers, as far as Fitzgerald knows. Beware P-Dawg's deceptive speed.

On defense, the Wildcats "appear" to be tough. We use quotations with "appear" because any notion of actual competence is flatly fucking ridiculous. This is the same defense that gave up 31 points a game last season, while allowing 243 passing yards per game on 63% passing. You may remember them from such farces as "Jake Christensen torches NU for over 200 yards in one half" and "No seriously that Jake Christensen thing happened."

Northwestern's stats are much improved on defense this season, and for good reason: they have played absolutely fucking nobody. This is their slate so far: Syracuse, @Duke, Southern Illinois, Ohio. Seriously, that's it. I was going to make a "St. Mary's Sisterhood of the Retarded and/or Canadian" joke, but why? Syracuse is worse than that. So sure, you guys have given up like 20 points or whatever, but come on. Northwestern makes Minnesota look like the 1985 Bears.

As for Iowa's approach to attacking Northwestern, it will be two words:

Quarterback. Sneak.

No, it's Shonn Greene. Of course it is. Sure, he only lasted three quarters in last week's demolition derby, but his conditioning improves from week to week--he set career highs against Pitt in both carries and yards. Look for him to encounter significantly less resistance against a line that comes from just Northwestern. 200 yards and 4 TDs? Probably.

How important is it that Greene put together another high-powered performance? Let's let Captain Kirk put everything into proper perspective:

Asked this week if he had considered where his offense would be had running back Shonn Greene not successfully made it back from a year of academic exile, Iowa football coach Kirk Ferentz gave a pretty good indication of how much Greene means to the Hawkeyes, who open Big Ten play at 11 a.m. today against Northwestern.

"No, I didn’t think about that," Ferentz said sharply. "I didn’t think about our plane crashing the other day, either. That could have happened. I try to avoid topics like that. I have enough things that are bringing me down."

Allegory: The Paki O'Meara Experience

As for the passing game, Iowa will whip out the Hangin' and Swangin' Dick Stanzi again. Christensen had his opportunity to solidify the starting role by leading a second-half comeback against Pitt, and that clearly didn't happen. And yes, while SDS throws way too many Stanziballs, far more than Christensen does, at some point an offense needs the ability to consistently hit through the air, and Stanzi's probably the only one on the roster who can do that.

Meanwhile, the entire Iowa receiving corps is healthy and eligible for the first time since 19-fuckity-never. Between Tony Moeaki's health problems and Iowa's near-constant need for 2-TE sets in 2007, the Hawkeyes now have three very capable tight ends.

Similar problems with injuries have provided Iowa with five WRs with starting experience, and all (with the only possible exception of Stross) have improved since 2007. That's not to say, of course, that Iowa's going to rewrite receiving records or that NU needs to be prepared for that A-11 shit (unless Fitz is reading this; in that case, YES ABSOLUTELY PREPARE FOR ONLY THAT), but the weapons are finally there.

If you want a prediction, here it is: Iowa 31, Just Northwestern 13. Northwestern is the worst 4-0 BCS team in many years, and this week will only confirm it.

Sure, Iowa just lost their first game of the year, 21-20. But how much do we really know? What was really important about losing to Pitt? What does it all mean, Basil? The Takeaway has the answer.

HASSAN CHOP!

Jake Christensen has officially played his way out of the starting lineup. There are myriad stories floating around about why Stanzi didn't see a single snap in the second half, and while none of them are anywhere near verifiable enough for publication (other than this nugget: "mutiny"?! Come on guys, Varsity Blues was an MTV joint. You can lie better than MTV), it's safe to say that bizarre, ineffectual one-minute drill by Stanzi to end the first half probably earned him a spot on the sidelines for two quarters.

And two quarters is it, because Stanzi is now your starter, according to Ferentz and the depth chart (pops to embedded PDF). This is probably for the best; Christensen was beaten into fear and insufficiency in 2007, and that sort of thing you just can't unlearn. After his offseason QB lessons with legendary NFL superstar Steve DeBerg, Christensen has now turned into the Big Ten's Dikembe Mutombo, a player of considerable athleticism and skills, but without the organic thought process to make it highly functional. He, like Mutombo, is like a robot on offense, deciding what steps his body will take before he executes them. The end result is awkward passes, pocket panic, and a game that cannot evolve as quickly as the play around him.

It's a genuine shame, because like Ladell Betts eight years prior, Christensen shouldered the load to the best of his ability, has little to nothing to show for it, and not one single time mouthed off publicly about it. Granted, Betts had plenty more room to gripe, but Drew Tate didn't, and that didn't stop the Five-Shooter, now, did it? We'll let Mike Gundy voice our opinion on the kid one last time, then tentatively relegate all Christensen talk to the trash bin of yesterday's news:

Stanzi is once again the Manzi against Northwestern, a role he has earned. While he's probably liable for a drive-killing Stanziball or two (or three), we're hard-pressed to imagine a scenario without injury or full implosion that involves a prominent role for Christensen from here on out. Shame that the era ends like this, but end it must.

Iowa's lone defensive weakness is at safety. On Pitt's first and third touchdowns, both long runs snaking through the Iowa secondary, FS Brett Greenwood was caught laughably out of position. The first run was especially egregious, as one unremarkable juke move left Greenwood with two broken ankles and utterly incapable of laying even a hand on the rusher five feet in front of him. Greenwood hardly made his presence known against this first tough opponent of the season (notable exception: saving a 20+ yard run with a dive tackle on McCoy's ankles in the second half), and we're thinking the comparisons to Sean Considine and Derek Pagel can wait until Greenwood cuts down on the mental errors that were famously absent from his predecessors' play.

E for Effort. Or Error.

Meanwhile, Tyler Sash (above), coming off a virtuoso performance against Iowa State, was downright pedestrian this Saturday, making some plays and missing just as many. We're not ready to give up the experiment on either safety so far (and looking at the depth charts, neither are the coaches), but they absolutely must perform at a higher level against a spread rush team like Northwestern--no position is put at higher stress levels against a spread offense than safety.

The cornerbacks, however, are doing just fine. It's safe to say Amari Spievey is doing just fine and will start until his career's over here. The Prodigal Hawkeye didn't miss a single tackle or lose coverage that we can remember, and he's still a sophomore in his first season of BXI action. We couldn't have known it at the time, but with Jordan Bernstine's problematic hammy, Spievey has become every bit as important an acquisition for the defense as Shonn Greene was for the offense. Bradley Fletcher has improved, yes, but without Spievey, we're either starting Shaun Prater (good, but definitely not ready) or Drew Gardner (horrrrk) right now. Those two are serviceable in spot duty. Spievey is undoubtedly a future NFL cornerback. The difference is palpable.

No Constitutional Amendments can help you now!

Meanwhile, after three unremarkable games, Kroul and Unusual Punishment have made their presence known once again. After Iowa went down 14-3, Pittsburgh tried to establish a running game, and it led to a two-quarter drought as the Panthers watched Iowa climb back into the lead. Statistics be damned; conventional rushing against Iowa is useless. Err, I mean, no! Anything but that! Please, opponents, don't rush up the middle on Iowa! We'd be doomed, I tell you, doomed!

Shonn Greene is doing an Earl Campbell impression for which he is unprepared. God bless Shonn Greene. Honestly. For someone who spent, as near as we can tell, almost two years away from the football field (first the ankle injury in 2006, then his academic hiatus), he is putting in a superhuman effort.

This is normal, Mr. Wannstedt. Be happy it only happened once. Northwestern's going to see it happen, like, four times.

Greene currently ranks eighth in the NCAA in rushing offense, which is remarkable; not only did he not run up gaudy stats on cupcakes and MACrifices, but that career high he put up against Pitt came in essentially three quarters. In the fourth, Greene was completely worn out, barely able to peel himself off the field or walk without a noticeable limp. In this sense, Greene is like 2006-07 Tony Freeman, a physical specimen, but noticeably lacking in conditioning. Freeman improved there, and we have no doubt Greene will too. We just hope it'll be soon; if he gets to the level where he can register thirty carries in a game, Iowa probably wins it. And really, if Greene rushes 30 times, no game is off the table. The sooner Greene reaches this level is the closer Iowa gets to a high-level bowl game.

PHOTO CREDITS:

1--Brian Ray/The Gazette
2--Press Citizen / Matthew Holst
3--Press Citizen / Matthew Holst
4--AP Photo/Keith Srakocic

Sure, Iowa just outlasted an underwhelming Iowa State team, 17-5. But how much do we really know? What was really important about beating ISU? What does it all mean, Basil? The Takeaway has the answer.

In the most gruesome play of the afternoon, Matt Kroul rips Iowa State quarterback Austin Arnaud's head off. No penalty was called, as Kroul did not grip the face mask.

The Hawkeye defense is as deep as it is tough. For the third time in as many games this season, Iowa held its opponent out of the end zone, limiting the Cyclones to five lousy points; ISU's points came from a made field goal and two pity points after kicker Grant Mahoney clanged a kick from 21 yards away.

The third quarter looked disturbingly similar to the first half of last season's Iowa-ISU game, where the ball was on Iowa's side of the field the whole time. This time, the Cyclones couldn't even put points on the board with special teams. All credit goes to what might end up being the stoutest defense in the conference. While most of the top-end talent is on the defensive line, there are no real weak spots in terms of athleticism, performance, or depth.

Nowhere is that more ably demonstrated than the secondary. If you'd told us that Jordan Bernstine would barely be on the two-deeps at this point, we'd be horrified at the prospects for the pass defense. Sure enough, as he recovers from hamstring problems, Bernstine is essentially the fourth corner on the depth chart, and those in front of him are showing no signs of relenting any snaps. Bradley Fletcher has improved demonstrably from last year, Amari Spievey is the surest tackler at CB for Iowa since Benny Sapp, and true freshman Shaun Prater was in at crunch time, breaking up ISU's last gasp in the back of the end zone on fourth down.

All in all, though Austen Arnaud seemed to pick apart the Iowa pass defense at times, the Clones couldn't get in the end zone again (it's been more than 10 quarters since they've hit pay dirt vs. Iowa), and the Iowa defense is now ranked third nationally in pass efficiency. Credit should also go to the linebackers, especially AJ Edds, but great pass defense starts in the secondary, and Iowa is rock-solid there.

Another example? Why, sure. Harold Dalton started all last season at strong safety, and he was no liability. Then, during spring practices, coaches frequently mentioned Dalton's backup, Lance Tillison (who, by the way, is jacked as hell), as a strong contender to start. So with both Tillison and Dalton healthy, the coaches started Tyler Sash, a freshman from Oskaloosa. Sash responded with 12 tackles, a key third-down sack, and a goal-line interception that he ran out to the one-yard-line before walking out of bounds. That was one boneheaded play in an otherwise brilliant debut for Sash, who should be a strong contender for the BXI's defensive player of the week honors.

Broderick Binns is also good.

You want more? We'll give you more. Pat Angerer's first two years at Iowa were disasters, last season marked by mononucleosis and a variety of injuries. He thought about quitting football, and few would have questioned him. He stayed, and on Saturday he usurped Jacody Coleman, who started multiple games as a true freshman last season in relief of Mike Klinkenborg. Angerer was flying around the field all day against ISU, but no play was bigger than him blowing up a screen pass on third and short with Iowa protecting a 10-3 lead. Iowa State was forced to punt, and this happened:

Ballgame.

Iowa's ground game is no longer a question mark. Shonn Greene's numbers look good on their own: 20 carries, 120 yards, one touchdown. That they came in the rain is seemingly no surprise, as rain is supposed to help a ground game (and let's be clear, in dry conditions, he doesn't sneak out of that tackle and gain 31 yards in the first quarter). But make no mistake, Greene would have easily topped 150 yards on a decent field yesterday.

Greene slipped several times on the slick surface, usually every time he tried to make a hard cut. Thanks to outstanding blocking from Bryan Bulaga and the rest of the offensive line, Greene rarely encountered any trouble near the line of scrimmage, and when he did, his strength was enough to carry him forward for respectable numbers. Perhaps ISU's just miserable in the front seven, but we're not so quick to discount the quality of what appears to be Iowa's most brutish ground game since the days of Nick Bell.

  The Surgeon General recommends that you avoid trying to tackle Shonn Greene at all costs. Also, eat 4-6 servings of vegetables every day.

Iowa's passing game, on the other hand, is more of a concern than ever. Oh boy, where do we even start? How about Stanzi to Brodell in the first quarter? Having drawn ISU offsides on a hard count, Stanzi had a free play, and he rolled out to his right, looking long. There was Andy Brodell, who was laughably, insanely open. Rather than squaring his shoulders and planting his feet, Stanzi threw on the run, despite no evident pressure from the ISU rush. The pass sailed and missed Brodell by about three yards, and what should have been an easy touchdown to put the Cyclones down by 10 early instead fell to the ground harmlessly. A false start erased the five-yard bonus of the offsides call immediately afterwards, and the Iowa drive would end in an interception. Indeed, Iowa wouldn't see those points until the fourth quarter, well after the end of the Ricky Stanzi Experience.

Stanzi's overall numbers were as horrifying as his play seemed to indicate: 5-14, 75 yards, 0 touchdowns, two interceptions. The second pick was so ill-advised that Ferentz had no choice to bring in Christensen--it was a curl route into triple coverage that wouldn't have even garnered a first down on third and long. Stanzi sailed passes all game long, including one on third down in the end zone to an easily open Allen Reisner on the game's first drive. Between that and the Brodell debacle, Stanzi left 11 points off the board for Iowa on those two throws. It's tough to say whether Christensen would have erred so badly on the same two plays.

Christensen entered the game with one play remaining in the third quarter. He started the drive with a checkdown pass to Shonn Greene, who motored ahead for a first down, and later Christensen made arguably the most important move of the game without throwing the ball. Facing 3rd and a long 4 at the ISU 25, Christensen audibled to an off-tackle run for Greene, who took it inside the Clones' 5-yard-line. Greene scored on the next play, and Iowa had all the momentum from there on out.

Don't tackle him, it only makes him mad.

Christensen still looked shaky, though, despite converting four of his five passes. Only the pass to Greene resulted in over five yards or a first down, and Iowa went three and out while trying to protect that 10-3 lead late in the fourth.

Anyone who tells you right now who will start at Pittsburgh this Saturday is either guessing or lying. They don't know. Kirk Ferentz doesn't even know. So naturally we don't know. We do know that nobody was booing Jake when he came in this week, and nobody's going to be booing him for a while after Iowa hoisted that stupid-looking trophy that ought to be thrown into a volcano like some sort of reverse sucktastic Ring of Sauron. The QB race continues, and as long as Iowa keeps winning, that's just fine.

It may be a shitty trophy, but it's our shitty trophy.

Photo credits, top to bottom: John Schultz, Lee News Service/QC Times; John Schultz, Lee News Service/QC Times; Doug Dornath, HawkeyeSports.com; John Schultz, Lee News Service/QC Times; AP Photo/Charlie Niebergall; John Schultz, Lee News Service/QC Times

Sure, Iowa just throttled a wildly overmatched FIU team, 42-0. But how much do we really know? What was really important about beating FIU? What does it all mean, Basil? The Takeaway has the answer.

Adrian Clayborn is about to get your face pregnant.

1. The defense is still awesome. Sure, Iowa won 42-0, but for the defense, the score remains 3-2; that's how many points opposing offenses have scored, and how many points the Iowa defense has scored. It was almost a 9-3* lead for the Hawkeyes, as AJ Edds was one shoestring away from taking a pick to the house in the second quarter. All told, Iowa harassed the, uh, "Golden Panthers" (how that isn't a sex act in UrbanDictionary.com is beyond me--oh wait, here we go) into three turnovers, including two embarrassingly easy interceptions. Iowa is now +2 in turnover margin on the season, and it's a lot easier to win games if you're on the right side of that metric (also helpful: playing wretched football teams every week).

Speaking of giving the ball up, while Stanzi absolutely punished the FIU defense to the tune of 162 yards and 3 TDs on only 8-10 passing, he once again threw an unconscionable pass. This one was dropped by a stationary FIU defender after hitting him square in the numbers. Stanzi showed flashes of brilliance Saturday, but--if uncorrected--his penchant for stupid throws will come back to haunt Iowa once the real season begins (and that would be this weekend).

Off to Never-Never-Land.

2. Colin Sandeman is ready to play in the Big Ten. Sandeman was pressed into action last season out of sheer necessity, returning punts and going over the middle despite weighing roughly a buck oh five. He's a different player altogether these days, and his two scores against FIU signaled to the Big Ten that the Iowa receiving corps is deep and dangerous. That felt really weird to type.

DJK is Iowa's top receiver these days, as he does things nobody else on the team can do. His tightrope act over the last five yards of his touchdown catch was probably the most masterful play of the entire game, and it set a clear tone for the entire game: Iowa will dominate. Even when Stross comes back in a week (and hopefully no later than that), it's unlikely that DJK will be unseated from the starting lineup.

As far as Brodell, he was once again lightly used as a receiver, gaining just 15 yards from scrimmage on two catches. That's fine for early season games against punching bags, but we're hoping to see more from him as the season goes on. He's most effective in space, so the dreaded bubble screen ought to return to Iowa's repertoire any day now. We don't know why O'Keefe hasn't busted it out yet; do the coaches think opposing teams don't know about it? Trust us, they do.

You happy now, assholes?

3. Anyone who booed Jake Christensen is a lowlife piece of shit. The boos were largely coming from the student section, which isn't a complete surprise; having been students at Iowa ourselves, we know good and goddamn well that Chicagoland's unbrightest 19-year-olds can barely be trusted ever, much less at 12 noon after four hours of sleep and 11 beers. That's no excuse. No real fan boos like that, especially not a kid who's been a class act the whole way and never once complained even as he was getting sacked four times a game and was throwing to receivers who had no business being on the field, much less starting. Not to go all Mike Gundy on you, but this certainly merits mention:

He's a good kid. Further, he's not even a bad quarterback--despite his first drive stalling, he did end up going 8-12 for 99 yards and a score. His touchdown to Sandeman was beautifully thrown. Hardly the work of someone who's bad at football or who, as Pat Harty idiotically claimed** (not making this up), "was set up to fail."

And so now we have a new quarterback who's almost certainly going to start against Iowa State next week, and a very good (maybe even better) backup that doesn't dare set foot on the field unless Iowa's down by two scores and Stanzi is visibly drunk. It's a shame.

We don't know yet what the Daily Iowan's coverage of the game will look like, but as the paper of record for the UI campus, it had goddamn better excoriate the students for an unbelievably classless gesture to Christensen, who has handled himself on and off the field with an almost unreasonable amount of maturity. That his fellow students can't be bothered to even try to return the favor suggests that Christensen deserves far, far better, and the Iowa students deserve far worse. Grow up, you insufferable little pricks.

Clayborn and Sandeman photos are via John Schulz of the QC Times; the Christensen picture is via Charlie Neibergall of the AP. All photos from HawkMania's picture thread, which is quite worth your time, especially when Clayborn is caving in McCall's spinal column.

*Yes, we're giving the defense the extra points on those, otherwise it's unfair when both sides score a TD.
**It would be entirely disingenuous for me to take that shot at Harty without mentioning the rest of his column, which was very respectful to Christensen and unequivocal in its disdain for the boobirds. Then again, Christensen's now the backup QB; how can the media not love him?

Sure, Iowa just throttled a wildly overmatched Maine team, 46-3. But how much do we really know? What was really important about beating Maine? What does it all mean, Basil? The Takeaway has the answer.

1. There is no answer at quarterback yet. Both quarterbacks looked decent at times and brutal at others. Jake Christensen doesn't appear to have any touch on his throws, but when he's got time and an open primary receiver, he's lethal. The interception was a poorly thrown pass, and Iowa was lucky to come away with 15 yards off a pass interference penalty when he badly underthrew Brodell on a post.
   
   But Stanzi, while appearing more "poised," threw some absolutely brainless passes yesterday. One ended up being a first down on an out to DJK, but a I-A defensive back would have taken it the other way for six. The other was a softly-thrown jump ball to a walk-on TE in the back of the end zone. In double coverage. Again, a real team picks that. Past that, while he was mostly steady in the pocket, the Iowa offense sputtered under Stanzi until the 4th, when even Maine had given up on using starters.
   
   Neither player distinguished himself yesterday, and it's safe to assume Ferentz will be using both QBs in a similar rotation over the next few weeks until one proves to be substantially more effective.
   
   
2. Adrian Clayborn is every bit the nightmarebeast we expected, and then some. Clayborn was all over the field yesterday, stuffing runs, harassing the Maine backfield, and making effective reads all game long.
   
   Clayborn ended the day with eight tackles, leading all Hawkeyes. He also broke up two passes and, in one particularly telling instance, discharged his babies on Maine QB Adam Farkes' face.
   
   
   Get your own fucking towel.
   
   
3. Welcome back, Andy Brodell. Anyone who doubted Brodell's impact on Iowa's success no longer has an excuse for their ignorance. Brodell only caught one early pass for 16 yards, but he took an end-around 24 yards on the opening drive and registered 81 return yards, constantly placing Iowa in favorable field position. Again, this is just Maine, so he probably won't be averaging 15 yards per return. But he's very effective in space, a shifty runner who maintains momentum toward the goal line at all times. He'll have plenty of bigger days in the stat book than yesterday, but just seeing that he was the Andy Brodell of old was exciting enough for us.
   
   Oh, and he's a vicious blocker.
   
   
   
   That's nice too.

[Both photos credited to Matthew Holst, Iowa City Press-Citizen]

Hey everybody. I'm Oops Pow Surprise of Black Heart/Gold Pants, and I'm here with Oklahoma State head football coach Mike Gundy! Mike, how the heck are you today?

I'm doing great, Oops Pow, thanks for having me.

Well, most people know you as a Big XII coach, Mike...

That's true.

...but you're a fan of all conferences?

 That's true too. I think fans, coaches, and players can all learn and expand their horizons from observing as much football as possible. Not every game can be a shootout, and you have to know how to win any kind of game.

Sage words, Coach. So, I assume your list starts with Curtis Painter.

Continue reading this post »

THE GOOD

Shonn Greene is the starter. Shonn Greene is the starter. Shonn Greene is the starter.

Although O'Meara looked like the second-stringer yesterday, we don't expect that to last for long; he is a walk-on, after all. By the time the BXI season rolls around, we expect the pecking order to probably shape up like this: Greene, Guillory, Hampton, O'Meara, Brinson, and Robinson. Brinson and Robinson could probably redshirt.

Adrian Clayborn is an absolute terror. Barring injury, he will be all-conference this year. He spent the entire practice in Iowa's backfield on Saturday, ritually abusing everyone that was put in front of him.

Broderick Binns looks just fine at the other end spot if either Clayborn or Ballard misses any time. He performed admirably against Kyle Calloway on Saturday.

The entire front seven is both talented and deep. There are probably seven linebackers who can start right now. Against Maine, the starting three are probably Hunter, Coleman, and Eeeeeedds, but that's not to say that Angerer, Tarpinian, and Nielsen won't have plenty of snaps in the next few games. The first two could plausibly end up starting. Angerer in particular has looked ferocious in the middle; Jacody Coleman will have to be an absolute rock in order to keep his spot atop the depth chart.

Ryan Donahue looks more consistent this year. He's always had a cannon for a leg, but the disastrous punts (like, say, the 13-yarder against ISU) should be relics.

THE BAD

The quarterback situation still isn't good. At times, Christensen looked better. At times, Stanzi looked better. And McNutt looked a lot more like the heralded recruit he was in high school than he did in the spring. While the play at quarterback will almost certainly improve over 2007 (unless, of course, injuries ravage the offense like last season), there are probably still going to be some "ugh" moments. In fact, some "ugh" games. I don't see this passing game carving up a good secondary.

Perhaps it's just the fact that they were going up against one of the top 3 defensive lines in the Big Ten, but the offensive line struggggled in the rushing game. Nobody sprang a big run all day long. Sure, the defense knew what was coming, but that's no excuse, especially when other teams have been saying for years that they've been able to predict Iowa's plays before the snap. A great offensive line can tell you what's coming, then run right over you anyway. Sure, the line's better than last year, but they're nowhere near the glory years of '01-'03 yet.

We don't know why the mainstream media refuse to report Casey McMillan ripping the top off the iconic water tower in the northeast corner, then drinking it dry, then flinging it into the pediatric ward of the UIHC. Ignoring the McMenace doesn't make it go away!

THE CHARLIE WEIS'S FRONT BUTT

What in God's name has happened to Iowa's special teams? We successfully exiled Austin Signor to the hinterlands of Eastern Illinois, but incumbent Daniel Murray and freshman Trent Mossbrucker are scarcely better. The idea that Iowa can't improve on a season where they missed one of every seven extra points and half their field goals is, to be perfectly frank, horrifying. How do you fuck up that badly? How do you not improve? They're extra points. They're practically point blank. There are D-III kickers who are better than 24-28. Fucking figure it out.

It's about that time.  For the next month, BHGP will be previewing this year's Iowa Hawkeyes, position-by-position.  Naturally, as the earth revolves around the sun, things will change.  Therefore, we're starting with the position we are most certain of, and ending with running back the position of which we are least certain.  To date:

1. Defensive Tackle
2. Tight End
3. Safety
4. Center
5. Defensive End
6. Wide Receiver
7. Linebacker
8. Special Teams

Today: Quarterback

OK, let's do it.

The Starter, For Now

Jake Christensen (6'1", 215, Jr.) - There are certainly differing viewpoints on how tenuous Christensen's grasp on the top line is, but let's not confuse conflict with uncertainty:  JC6 will start the season as the first-team quarterback.

Jake was one of the crown jewels of the vaunted - and now oft-maligned - 2005 Iowa recruiting class.  He was one of the best high school quarterbacks in the country, lauded for his sound mechanics, throwing accuracy, and ability to scramble (he was considered a "dual-threat" quarterback; all the talk of Christensen as a Chandler-like pocket passer are patently false).  He played in the U.S. Army All-American Game with Richardson, Stross, Doering, Moeaki, and Blum.  He was, by all accounts, the heir apparent to Drew Tate.  He redshirted, then saw limited action in his second season, primarily in lieu of an injured Tate against Northern Illinois (the infamous "kinda gay" game).  He looked about as good as you'd expect from a freshman, completing 65% of his passes but throwing a couple of bad picks (especially against Minnesota) and exhibiting a bad tendency to hold onto the ball too long.

Last season?  Well, as OPS has said, you could write 1500 words about Christensen's 2007 campaign and not even scratch the surface.  There were a multitude of reasons why it might have been such a struggle, many of which were out of his control:

• Injuries/suspensions/attrition in the receiver corps - Christensen entered fall camp with Brodell and Douglas at receiver (with Stross as the third option) and Moeaki at tight end.  By the end of week 4, he had Cleveland and DJK at receiver (with a rotation of Chaney/Sandeman/Nelson(?)/Stross in there, as well), and Myers at tight end.  Not one of those players (save for the injury-plagued Stross) had any serious experience.  It certainly didn't help Christensen.  There were repeated subtle hints that the receivers had no idea what they were doing and could not run precise routes.  If true, it makes sense.
• Position flux and youth in the offensive line - The following players played on the offensive line during 2007: Richardson, Calloway, Kuempel, Doering, Eubanks, Bruggeman, Aeschliman, Meade, Vandervelde, Olsen, Blum, Koeppel, Bulaga.  That's 13 different offensive linemen who saw action.  That's amazing in and of itself, but it doesn't even factor in position changes (I'm pretty sure Olsen played in three different positions over the course of last season).  Two of those players had ever started before.  None of them graduated (though Richardson's career is apparently over due to injury).  That lack of experience led to confusion in the running game (zone blocking is unconventional and requires some smarts, and experience is absolutely essential) and routine breakdowns in pass protection.  Christensen was sacked 46 times last season.  That number is completely unacceptable, and is probably 75% due to offensive line play.
• Playcalling - FIRE KOK.  All right, I won't start just yet, but the playcalling was atrocious.  Part of it was certainly due to O'Keefe's dedication to the Lloyd Carr offensive system, but MUAK made a valid point not that long ago: KOK probably looked at his offense - particularly his passing offense - with a young quarterback, young line, and young receivers, and cut the playbook down considerably.  With a handful of experienced receivers at his disposal, possibly including one of the best tight ends in the country and a couple of bona fide deep threats on the outside, maybe things will open up.  Then again, it's KOK, so don't hold your breath.

Those things are all important, but they still don't entirely explain away a season in which a quarterback with renowned accuracy completed 53.5% of his passes and averaged only 6.13 yards per attempt.  JC might have thrown for 2200 yards, but he was over 200 yards only 4 times in 12 games.  He might have only thrown 6 picks, but an incredible number of passes were so far off-target that nobody from either team had a chance to catch them.  He might have been sacked 46 times, but a significant portion of those were a result of Christensen holding the ball too long.  The point is this:  Even if everything listed above is true, and even if all those things had their greatest possible effect, Christensen should still have been better than he was.

Barring another parade of arrests and injuries, there's no excuse this season.  The receiver rotation is fairly concrete, and all receivers have significant experience.  Moeaki is back.  The offensive line should be more solidified and also picked up much-needed experience.  KOK is still there, but might open up the offense more, especially given the fact he doesn't have a returning running back.  It's time for this offense in general, where 9 (effectively 10, given last season's criminal non-use of Tom Busch) starters are back, to make a big move forward.  That's going to depend on Christensen.

Ferentz has repeatedly compared Christensen to Matt Rodgers, who went 5-6 as a sophomore starter in 1989 before taking Iowa to the Rose Bown in 1990.  The comparison is somewhat suspect.  The 1989 Hawkeyes had no running game whatsoever; the passing offense was actually pretty good.  Rodgers was #2 in the Big Ten in passing in his first season as a starter and was named honorable mention all-conference.  He went 29-41 against Michigan that season, threw for nearly 300 yards against Illinois (who had the best pass defense in the country), and was almost perfect against Northwestern.  Aside from the Syracuse game (23-32, 278 yards, 4 TD's), has Christensen ever played anything resembling those games?  There were signs of life, to be sure (the second half of the Northwestern game comes to mind), but we have yet to see it for four consecutive quarters.  If Christensen has a sophomore-to-junior-season jump akin to Rodgers, he's probably playing like Brian Hoyer at MSU.  That's not great, but it's probably enough to get 8 wins.

The Backup, For Now

Rick(y) Stanzi (6'4", 225, Soph.) - Hayden Fry once said the best player in the Big Ten, year in and year out, was the backup quarterback at Iowa.  If you had any doubts, just ask an Iowa fan, who would bench the starter yesterday.

Rick(y) Stanzi is the heir to the backup quarterback throne and, if you ask many Iowa fans, should be the starter.  He wasn't highly regarded or heavily recruited out of high school, but received offers from Purdue, Miami (OH), and Toledo before choosing the Hawks.  At 6'4", he has ideal size.  He's not quite as fast as Christensen, but by all accounts has some mobility.  He was buried behind classmate Arvell Nelson last season.  The inside word was that, despite Christensen's problems, the staff had no faith in either of its backups (Stanzi was raw, and Nelson was apparently stoned).  Christensen was the quarterback, no matter what happened.

Not anymore.  After two series of the spring game in which Christensen threw an interception and a Tacopants overthrow, Stanzi took the reins and looked pretty good (the staff said JC was injured, but he wasn't hit and actually played significant time later; we're gullible, but not that gullible).  He threw a bomb to Stross and exhibited the feel for touch passes not often seen from JC last year.  Of couse, he also threw a pick and a number of incompletions.  Nevertheless, he was arguably better than Christensen and certainly better than McNutt.  He was the co-first team starter after spring, and may well have won the starting job had he not sustained a shoulder injury.  Word is he will be back in mid-August, but the damage is probably done.  Stanzi will enter the fall at #2.  How long he stays there is up to Christensen.

The Wild Card

Marvin McNutt (6'4", 210, Fr. (RS)) - Last year, we heard a lot about McNutt.  We heard he had a Howitzer for an arm.  We heard he could scramble for yardage like Brad Banks.  We heard he helps old women cross the street and, in his spare time, solves crimes.  If you sat in the stands of Kinnick or the parking lots of Melrose Avenue last fall, you could have walked away thinking McNutt was the second coming. 

McNutt, a St. Louis native, received offers from just about every program in the region (Iowa, Indiana, Kansas, Missouri, Nebraska, Wisconsin, Minnesota) by the end of his junior year.  He was redshirted last season, but nevertheless dominated conversations on potential replacements at quarterback.  We heard he was getting a lot of snaps in the week of post-season practice Iowa conducted as the bowl situation worked itself out.

Spring?  Eh...it wasn't pretty.  Marvin's footwork wasn't good and his accuracy was lacking.  Maybe it was just a bad day, and maybe it was a function of working with the second-team offense, but he did not look ready for prime time.  His position on the post-spring depth chart, firmly behind Christensen and Stanzi, only reinforced that view.  That said, with Stanzi's shoulder injury, McNutt might have a chance to move up the depth chart this fall and get himself into position to take over.  Nevertheless, expect to see him in garbage time, especially in the first 2-3 weeks of the season.

Could See the Field

James Vandenberg (6'3", 195, Fr.) - If Stanzi comes back in mid-August at full health, I would expect all three of Iowa's incoming freshman quarterbacks to redshirt.  However, it's not out of the question that one sees some playing time due to injury.  If it happens, my money's on Vandenberg, a Keokuk native who threw for 3700 yards and 49(!) touchdowns as a senior in leading Keokuk to the 3A state championship.  He's quick enough to avoid pressure and has been running a wide-open offense for two seasons.  Obviously, you don't plan on using a true freshman at quarterback, but you could do worse.

John Wienke (6'5", 225, Fr.) - Wienke was initially a Michigan commit who changed his mind at the 11th hour, probably because he's not exactly the prototypical spread option quarterback.  That being said, he's giant and has a great throwing arm.

This piece was meant to have been an all-inclusive, one-stop-pop roundtable discussion on the upcoming Hawkeye football season.  All four authors that contribute to BHGP were to answer 12 incredibly written questions and give their expertly expert expertise.  Seeing that I collaberate with a bunch of overzealous, pompous wannabees (I can only assume they were the same guys who, as kids, ran to the front of the class to be first to hand in their math assignments), this story is much larger than I anticipated.  Henceforth (yeah, big word, I know), this will be a double dipper.  Six questions now, six questions later.  Wow.  Fun.

LEGEND (for those of you scoring at home):

	Oops Pow Surprise
	Hawkeye State
	Jebus H Christ
	storminspank

EXPLANATION OF THE LEGEND:  If you were wondering about the basis of the icons for each contributor to the roundtable.  Here’s your answer.  I suppose I could have used everyone’s current avatar, but that would just confuse everyone severely.  The only logical thing to do was to go to Google.  It basically runs everything in the world, top to bottom.  The Google image results were studied and the most applicable images were used.  Sure, JHC gets a flaming unicorn and I get Pearl Jam rocking out on stage, but that’s randomization at its best.  If you disagree, go screw.

Now, without further ado, the questions…

Well, there’s a little more ado.  The questions are after the jump… so… make the jump… now.

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