Who said that we can't have compelling Marchifornication first round matchups?
STANZI BRACKET
No. 2 Seed: GARY "BLOODPUNCH" BARTA"
What he did to get here: Lost to James Vandenberg in the second round of last year's tournament; got pranked by Jamie Pollard; went wine tasting with Fran McCaffery; played Roger Sterling; popped the bubble Dr. Strangelove style; talked with Fran about his coaching antics, then gave him a raise; put up some billboards of his own; prank called Jamie Pollard; tried to fix Iowa's offense; reiterated that the 10-year, $41M dollar contract he gave Kirk Ferentz was totally awesome; helped hire a new coach; prank called Jamie Pollard again.
No. 7 Seed: BOB BOWLSBY
What he did to get here: Former Iowa athletic director; named Big 12 commissioner; got put on a billboard by Jamie Pollard for some reason in one of the all-time greatest failures in trolling; was accused of being a vampire; met Jamie Pollard.