The Shocking Truth of Why Ross Pierschbacher Broke Bad and Flipped to Alabama

Like most of our best ideas, it hit us on the toilet.

NOTE: There are a few spoilers for the first 5 1/2 seasons of "Breaking Bad" in here. If you'd prefer to remain blissfully spoiler-free, just go listen to the BHGPod again.

FACT: 4* OL recruit Ross Pierschbacher announced his decision to flip his verbal commitment from Iowa to Alabama on Sunday.

FACT: The final half-season of "Breaking Bad" began airing on Sunday.

Is there a connection between these two events? "Of course not, it's just a stupid coincidence," you say. OR IS IT?

Friend of the Pants @storminspank got the wheels turning for me on this wildly speculative grasping at straws hard-hitting investigative journalism.

And once that theory was out there, the rest of the evidence fell into place.

FACT: "Nick" has four letters... just like "Walt."

FACT: "Saban" has five letters... just like "White."

FACT: Walt is devoted to the production of his unique strain of crystal meth.

FACT: Saban is devoted to the pursuit of crystal footballs.

FACT: Walt is in the empire business.

FACT: So is Saban.

FACT: Walt once procured a heavy machine gun for mysterious (but no doubt nefarious) purposes.

FACT: No one can prove that Saban hasn't procured a heavy machine gun to keep "persuade" recruits to come to Alabama.

FACT: Walt got sweet, sweet revenge on a hated arch-nemesis in graphic, explosive fashion.

FACT: Saban got sweet, sweet revenge on a hated arch-rival in graphic, career-crushing fashion.

There you have it. Crazy, half-assed speculation Incontrovertible evidence that Nick Saban and the nefarious Heisenberg are one and the same and that Ross Pierschbacher fell victim to the sweet siren song of this criminal mastermind and his latest nefarious plot.

Heisensaban_gif_medium

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

Join Black Heart Gold Pants

You must be a member of Black Heart Gold Pants to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Black Heart Gold Pants. You should read them.

Join Black Heart Gold Pants

You must be a member of Black Heart Gold Pants to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Black Heart Gold Pants. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9347_tracker