There Will Be Nepotism

(Well, we're clearly bumping this. -- AJ)
Ladies and gentlemen... I've traveled over half our state to be here tonight. I couldn't get away sooner because my recruiting pipeline was coming in at New England and I had to see about it. That pipeline is now flowing at two players a year and it's getting me an income of five thousand dollars a week. I have two others out recruiting and I have sixteen in my coaching tree. So, ladies and gentlemen... if I say I'm a football man you will agree. You have a great chance here, but bear in mind, you can lose it all if you're not careful. Out of all men that beg for a chance to sell you victories, maybe one in twenty will be footballmen; the rest will be speculators-that's men trying to get between you and the footballmen-to get some of the wins that ought by rights come to you. Even if you find one that has charisma, and means to win, he'll maybe know nothing about winning and he'll have to hire out the coordinators on contract, and then you're depending on a coordinator that's trying to rush the job through so he can get another contract just as quick as he can. This is... the way that this works.
I do my own playcalling and the men that work for me, work for me and they are men I know. I make it my business to be there and see to their work. I don't lose my runningbacks in the hole and spend months fishing for them; I don't botch the offseason workout and let Rhabdo get in the urine and ruin the whole team. I'm a family man- I run a family business. This is my son and my partner, B.W. Ferentz.
We offer you the bond of family that very few footballmen can understand. I'm fixed like no other coach in this field and that's because my New England pipeline has just come in. I have a string of high school quarterbacks all ready to become defensive linemen. I can load a safety on a bus and have him playing tight end in a week. I have NFL GM connections so I can get seniors to the NFL; such things go by friendship in a rush like this. And this is why I can guarantee to start winning and put up the cash to back my word. I assure you, whatever the others promise to do, when it comes to the showdown in Indianapolis, they won't be there...
We expect no further comment at this time.
Unless otherwise expressly indicated by BHGP editors, this FanPost is strictly the viewpoint of the author and is not endorsed by BHGP in any way.
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In seriousness
I know the nepotism thing raises eyebrows, but I think this will turn out to be a good hire. The knock on Brian as a player was that he was undersized but made up for it with good technique. I know, learning and teaching are two different things. But the Pats also had beasts at TE this year. How much of that was Gronk being a monster and how much was coaching? I don’t know.
It’ll be an interesting year or two, that’s for sure.
"Hi, I'm Bob Executive. Which way to business?"
by IPeeBlackAndGold on Feb 18, 2012 5:37 PM CST reply actions
I don't watch NFL, so I'm wondering if the Pats ever used TEs as blockers (?).
Gronk played at Arizona, and I’m pretty damn sure he didn’t learn to block there.
So, my litmus test would be “How good of a blocker did Gronk become?” If he turned out to be good I would guess (I know Gronk’s a freak) that Coach BF was doing a good job of teaching to a TE what we’d want him to teach to OL at Iowa. And that sounds like a good thing.
Also, Brian was also known to be kind of a dirty player (though I’m not sure where that came from, just one of those common knowledge things maybe, don’t know) who did everything necessary to make up the talent gap (within some reason) if the other guy was playing better. I’d hate that guy/coach if I was any other team’s fan, but I’m not, and I don’t.
"Gophers are filthy digging rats"
-one of HFMR's many amazing tags
"It's Northwestern," he explained. "A smart school."
-TMart on jNW reading signals
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Feb 20, 2012 5:07 PM CST up reply actions
Well, considering some of OSU (and other schools') more talented guys
are also sometimes dirty POS’s, I’m also okay with BF playing to the edge of the rules.
Also, I may be mistaken, but I don’t think Gronk did much blocking this year. Maybe Aaron Hernandez (the other NE TE) did some, but probably not a lot, either.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 20, 2012 5:11 PM CST up reply actions
Gronk was an excellent blocker for the Pats when needed.
Hernandez was just OK. There were several well-designed plays where Gronk was a decoy in the Red Zone and stayed in blocking. He did quite well when that was his assignment, but I don’t think he did it all that much because he was such a beast as a receiver.
I spent half my life's earnings on wine, women & song. The other half I wasted.
by therealCatnuts on Feb 20, 2012 5:23 PM CST up reply actions
Huh, I hadn't heard, or had forgotten, about the dirty play bit.
I certainly wouldn’t want him teaching dirty tactics. I imagine it’s a pretty fine line between dirty play and “Bullies of the Big 10,” but would like to think we stay on the right side of the line most of the time.
"Hi, I'm Bob Executive. Which way to business?"
by IPeeBlackAndGold on Feb 21, 2012 12:20 AM CST up reply actions
dirty play is standard at OL
Just keep it away from the other guy’s face and from the refs and you’re okay.
I spent half my life's earnings on wine, women & song. The other half I wasted.
by therealCatnuts on Feb 21, 2012 12:53 AM CST up reply actions
Kirk's looking a little pale.
Looks good with a mustache, though. Or like a tinpot dictator of some Central American banana republic.
Maybe both.
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
About 90 seconds before the end of each half,
does KF shout “I’M FINISHED!!!!”
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 18, 2012 8:47 PM CST reply actions 9 recs
When did you get so funny?
Ugh, I hate you right now…
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Feb 20, 2012 8:52 PM CST up reply actions
Every once in awhile I do make many of you laugh,
even if you usually don’t want to admit it.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 21, 2012 8:53 AM CST up reply actions
I will be rec'ing the crap out of this post when I get home
Well done. Well done.
I spent half my life's earnings on wine, women & song. The other half I wasted.
by therealCatnuts on Feb 18, 2012 11:33 PM CST via mobile reply actions
This is so fucking brilliant
Before you respond, let me remind you: Brian Cook called me smug, which makes me the Obama of smugness. I'm basically Smugbama.
I drink your protein shake, I drink it up!
by Greg Hollingsworth on Feb 20, 2012 2:00 PM CST reply actions
(to the QBs and other red-jerseyed guys in practice)
No…. more…. hitting.
Now run along and play, and don’t come back.
If in two years or so if Brian Ferentz doesnt work out
And gets fired, can there be a post about kirk sitting him on a train and just leaving him there? And call it “there won’t be nepotism”?
I said I have a DRINKING PROBLEM!!
by bornofclay on Feb 20, 2012 4:05 PM CST via mobile reply actions
I vote Rob Howe.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 20, 2012 4:21 PM CST up reply actions
I don't even wish that on Harty.
He’s annoying, but not to the point that I want to see him beaten up.
Sean Keeler had his days, though. But he’s not around here now.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 20, 2012 5:13 PM CST up reply actions
Ryan Loftin.
"I’m not going to comment on anything beyond where I’ve been so far." - Gary Barta
by SomeJerkPoster on Feb 20, 2012 5:27 PM CST up reply actions
Clearly it would be Dantonio
You got no fear of the underdog; That's why you will not survive!
by YouCanPutYourEddsInIt on Feb 20, 2012 8:01 PM CST up reply actions
Ah, yes.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Feb 20, 2012 8:05 PM CST up reply actions
(gasp!)
It’s so good. No, really, it’s sooooooooo good. Sean, this is perfect.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
I've been bumped?
SO PROUD
(Oh shoot, pulling a Rhoads isn’t an automatic de-bump is it?)
"Hi, I'm Bob Executive. Which way to business?"
by IPeeBlackAndGold on Feb 21, 2012 12:10 AM CST reply actions 4 recs

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