VIDEO: What was that Iowa State nickname, Fox News?
by Adam Jacobi on Sep 7, 2011 8:01 AM CDT
in Iowa Hawkeyes Football
Email
PrintPSD found this video last month, but it's relevant now, so here we have it--a Fox news commentator introducing Ames and Iowa State University in a manner that is not at all embarrassing no sir:
I, like 95% of Americans, never watch political television at all, so I'm just going to guess that the guy speaking is Chris Wallace since that's the only name that comes up in the intro graphics. I'm sure he's either just the best or just the worst depending on what political views you hold and we really have no desire to have that discussion take place in the comments so please spare us all, because you're 100% missing the point and it will get you banned and nobody will feel bad for you whatsoever.
The point instead is that deliberately, exquisitely enunciated "Cyclowns" from Wallace's mouth, which is delightful mainly because what the hell? It'd be like if some other national news television personality introduced Iowa as the "Squawkeyes" or whatever the slur du jour might be, but with a totally straight face and an inflection like that's the actual name and he or she is just saying it as a momentarily helpful piece of background information but nothing to do with the main topic at hand. It's like meeting your boss at his house for dinner for the first time and he warmly introduces you to his entire family before ending with "...and this is our loving dog, Syphilitic Titweasel. Good girl. Now if you don't mind I'll show you the basement first, because there's a great home theater system I just had built..." Come to think of it, "Iowa State Syphilitic Titweasels" flows magnificently off the tongue. And nobody would call ISU the "Cyclowns" on cable political tv ever again. Give it a thought, Jamie Pollard. That one's on me, no charge.
So ISU... what up with that? Bad recon by the producer before the show? Wallace suffering the world's fastest stroke mid-word, then recovering immediately? Rogue agent on the teleprompter? There is a history of that, after all. We want answers just as much as the rest of you Syphilitic Titweasels--I mean Cyclowns--I... oh forget it.
32 comments
|
0 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
Can we please just change their name
to the Syphilitic Titweasels? I think that has quite a ring to it….
I had your mom: Beer, beer.
by Murray'sBiggestFan on Sep 7, 2011 8:31 AM CDT reply actions
Maybe they can get away from the fantasy-land cardinal-head-tornado-body thing
and have something that actually exists. I wasn’t sure if MSPainting human tits on a weasel is SFW… but a real weasel surely has to be, right?
BOOM 4-3 cover 2! Deal with that!
by 99playsNAblitzaint1 on Sep 7, 2011 8:54 AM CDT up reply actions
Sorry, this is the male version of the mascot, the Syphilitic Ballzweasel
The Titweasel is for the women teams.
BOOM 4-3 cover 2! Deal with that!
by 99playsNAblitzaint1 on Sep 7, 2011 8:55 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
NO PORN!
Sorry if I took a simple quip that was meant as a rebuke for a single-minded poster and turned it into a completely uninteresting and inconsequential tangent.
-McCann't
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Sep 7, 2011 9:47 AM CDT up reply actions
I would ask in the future that when posting that photo use both a subject line (thank you) and a black eye bar over those buttons. I hate that thing. It's not right.
Perhaps my best years are gone... but I wouldn't want them back. Not with the fire in me now. No, I wouldn't want them back.
Teleprompter misspelling
or deliberate mispronunciation for comedic effect?
Or perhaps it was this (You all know the clip. Language NSFW)
"'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'If it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic." - Lewis Caroll, Alice Through the Looking Glass
I'm guessing it was sabotage.
But instead of the cute Christina Applegate hijacking the prompter it was a covert Hawkeye operative. There is enough of a pause at the beginning that its possible.
Whoever was typing up the teleprompter script thought it would be funny. They were right. Fox is borderline “anything goes” anyway. Example – they were doing a story on some pretty serious forced entry home invasion robberies down in Florida and the video in the background was all hotties in bikinis strolling around the beach. The average producer probably isn’t going to go with that footage.
"If you need a rah-rah speech at halftime, you’re playing the wrong sport." - Pat Angerer
I think it's just Wallace's messed up accent
Which seems to be a combination of Chicago (where he grew up) and Boston (went to Harvard, worked for the Globe after school). Still pretty awesome either way.
by Luke Recker No-Look Pass on Sep 7, 2011 1:44 PM CDT up reply actions
It's funny because they really are clowns and this reinforces the notion that they really are clowns.
"Oh, glorious cheeseburger, we bow to thee. The secrets of the Universe are between the buns."
by Bucketochicken on Sep 7, 2011 8:49 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Almost as good as the ESPN SportsCenter announcer several years ago..
Commenting on a home run that juuust pulled foul. ‘He Yelked it.’
I wish i could find that clip..
"Cyclowns" is really really really really really really really really unfunny
Unless it is being said with complete seriousness on a nationally televised news program. Then, it turns out, it’s hilarious. Who knew?
Cyclowns is just about as funny as squawkeyes
Suckeyes, or hoks. Hoks? WTF does that one even mean? At least Cyclowns has an explanation: they have Ronald McDonald colors and they’re generally hilarious on the football field.
Those are all also dumb, but that does not mean we should sink to their level
Just Say No to Insulting Nicknames from Rivals.com Message Boards
You know who else is a Tavern Hawk?
Click here to find out.
Warning: You may get stupider as you go down the page.
Do cyclowns look like this?
Sad clowns.
I swear the "robbed a place" was actually not ment as a smart ass remark. I just forgot that he actually robbed a place for a second. ~ justsomehawkeyefan
This is what college kids do
when college kids are obese and embarrassed to take off their shirts to paint letters
"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull." - W.C. Fields
by rockyh on Sep 7, 2011 10:24 AM CDT up reply actions 10 recs
Those guys are the Cyclowns' offensive line.
Coker should have a field day Saturday.
by Herky's Middle Feather on Sep 7, 2011 1:02 PM CDT up reply actions
I can only hope
that the reasoning behind this is that someone messed with the wikipedia entry as they were doing the info checking. That is what would make me the happiest.
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
Related FanPosts on Black Heart Gold Pants
Related FanShots on Black Heart Gold Pants
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
