Bobert Zook Arrives at Big Ten Media Day: A Photo Essay
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how do you think he gets those recruits
He promises them they can “motor boat” his breasts
All my good friends at BHGP helpled pick this most awesome name!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! - Jim Zabel
by Bloodpunch's Barbasol on Jul 28, 2011 10:07 AM CDT up reply actions
Those are a reminder of his long ago participation in a UF medical experiment
meant to determine the viability of human male lactation for the nutritional advancement of orphaned Koala bears. He was paid $5000, which he used, almost in the entirety, to fund his not inconsiderable snake venom habit. Twice weekly injections has effects 100 times more powerful than viagra and ten times more powerful than ecstasy. He basically became an overly affectionate humping machine for days at a time.
"To bottomless perdition, there to dwell, in adamantine chains and penal fire" -Milton
by Lycurgus on Jul 28, 2011 10:12 AM CDT up reply actions 5 recs
Just like his brother Ron.
Sorry if I took a simple quip that was meant as a rebuke for a single-minded poster and turned it into a completely uninteresting and inconsequential tangent.
-McCann't
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Jul 28, 2011 11:36 AM CDT up reply actions
His favorite types of snake venom are:
Black-headed Bushmaster and Yellow-jawed Tommygoff
"To bottomless perdition, there to dwell, in adamantine chains and penal fire" -Milton
I just assumed
that, if you are born into the Zook family, you were born an overly-affectionate humping machine?
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 11:37 AM CDT up reply actions
He won the 1996 Panama City Beach Wet T-shirt Contest on MTV Summer Break.
Sorry if I took a simple quip that was meant as a rebuke for a single-minded poster and turned it into a completely uninteresting and inconsequential tangent.
-McCann't
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Jul 28, 2011 11:35 AM CDT up reply actions
He used more bronzer than all the other contestants combined.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 11:38 AM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
In only two bodily locations
like a poor man’s henna tatoo.
Sorry if I took a simple quip that was meant as a rebuke for a single-minded poster and turned it into a completely uninteresting and inconsequential tangent.
-McCann't
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Jul 28, 2011 3:08 PM CDT up reply actions
I see what you did there.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 10:16 PM CDT up reply actions
a set of the finest man boobs in the entire conference
"Black is a color of power and strength, and to see all those players, with the captains linking their arms in front-it's a powerful picture."
...Hayden Fry
by chuck longs mom on Jul 28, 2011 11:51 AM CDT up reply actions
That picture of Delany totally says:
“I’m pooping right now”
or
“Yes, I do have time to play with myself” in a Duke Nukem voice.
I'll just put COMING SOON down here.
I think I see the parallels here.
Apple ran the “1984” ad, and then spent the next 10 or 15 years losing (sometimes slowly, sometimes more rapidly) to Microsoft and IBM compatible brands. But then, they focused on other areas (music, phones, tablets) and have now probably re-taken the lead in the industry, despite still facing competition from experienced opposition (Dell) and new challengers (Droid).
So, Illinois (Apple) has spent much of the last 15 years losing to Ohio State (IBM/Microsoft). But now, the Illini have focused on home stadium upgrades and hiring good coordinators, and as OSU is beginning to falter, Illinois will now try to take the lead in the Big Ten Leaders, despite still facing competition from experienced opposition (Wisconsin) and a new challenger (Nebraska in a title game?)
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
Sure.
That’s exactly what it’s supposed to be.
Before you respond, let me remind you: Brian Cook called me smug, which makes me the Obama of smugness. I'm basically Smugbama.
by Patrick Vint on Jul 28, 2011 11:10 AM CDT up reply actions
That might work
If it weren’t for the fact that Illinois coached by Ron Zook while Wisconsin is coached by a decent coach and Penn State is coached by some guy you might have heard of while he was winning his 400th game.
"Choosing Penn State over Stanford, my god!!" - rumple
by ReadingRambler on Jul 28, 2011 11:41 AM CDT up reply actions
That's a pretty strange theory, Droz.
Sorry if I took a simple quip that was meant as a rebuke for a single-minded poster and turned it into a completely uninteresting and inconsequential tangent.
-McCann't
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Jul 28, 2011 3:10 PM CDT up reply actions
holy shit thats prophetic
and i thought BHGP was lll T&A
but my daughter, home from that other town in Iowa
tells me John Wayne Gaycey was from Waterloo
and i used to love that tonw
Long Live the Pellican Whore - like FOREVER
Gacy lived in Waterloo for roughly a decade, while in his 20s.
He was born in Illinois, and that’s where he went back to after he did time in prison in Iowa.
I’m giving Illinois the blame, on that one.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 10:17 PM CDT up reply actions
So far, this is what I've learned from media day:
- Bielema hates OSU and cheaters.
- Luke Fickell is very willing to stone-wall the media with non-answers all year long. But, he also wants the OSU fans to know that it will be business as usual in Columbus, and he wants all other fans (and the NCAA) to know he hasn’t talked at all with Tressel.
- Kevin Wilson hasn’t watched any game tape of his own players, but can wax poetic about his days at OU and the importance of the Rose Bowl?
- Joe Paterno is very capable for a man the age of 142.
-
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
142?
Have you seen Osborne? Who’s he then, one of them old dudes from the Book of Genesis?
"Choosing Penn State over Stanford, my god!!" - rumple
by ReadingRambler on Jul 28, 2011 11:42 AM CDT up reply actions
Yes.
Osbourne is actually Adam (from Genesis), and Lawrence Phillips is Cain. That means Tommie Frazier=Abel.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 11:52 AM CDT up reply actions
Kerry Collins is Moses.
Slow, but extremely effective.
"Choosing Penn State over Stanford, my god!!" - rumple
by ReadingRambler on Jul 28, 2011 11:57 AM CDT up reply actions
Yep.
And he certainly parted the Red Sea in 1994. If I’m reading the score correctly, they beat a 9-win OSU by about 50 points.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 12:03 PM CDT up reply actions
40 days and 40 nights of ball-control offense.
"They're not people, James Ingram. They're Jimmy Buffett fans."
by SomeJerkPoster on Jul 28, 2011 3:31 PM CDT up reply actions
God, or Abraham.
But he might be a little too old to play a convincing Abraham.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 10:18 PM CDT up reply actions
Here let me fix that for you
But he might be a little too old to play a convincingAbrahamGod
there it is fixed for you.
All my good friends at BHGP helpled pick this most awesome name!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! - Jim Zabel
by Bloodpunch's Barbasol on Jul 29, 2011 8:31 AM CDT up reply actions
Thank you.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 29, 2011 8:35 AM CDT up reply actions
Your Welcome!
Anything I can do to help, it is my pleasure.
Have a great day.
All my good friends at BHGP helpled pick this most awesome name!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! - Jim Zabel
by Bloodpunch's Barbasol on Jul 29, 2011 8:59 AM CDT up reply actions
I also wish you a great day, and a great weekend.
Hell, why not a great upcoming month of August and everything after, as well.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 29, 2011 9:35 AM CDT up reply actions
Chazz you are so nice
Why do people pick on you all the time?
I don’t see it. You are always polite and cordial.
All my good friends at BHGP helpled pick this most awesome name!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! - Jim Zabel
by Bloodpunch's Barbasol on Jul 29, 2011 1:16 PM CDT up reply actions
I like to think that I can get along with most people around here,
as long as I’m given slight common courtesy, as well.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 29, 2011 11:00 PM CDT up reply actions
Finally realized who JimDa looks like


BOOM 4-3 cover 2! Deal with that!
by 99playsNAblitzaint1 on Jul 28, 2011 4:04 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
Hey Dilbert, consider them rolled.
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 28, 2011 10:19 PM CDT up reply actions
I've been watching the BTN Media Day stuff a little more early on Friday morning.
I’m not sure if we covered this a couple months ago somewhere here at BHGP or not, but Illinois’s schedule this year is a fucking joke.
They have 8 true home games, including the first 5 games of the year at home. Their Big Ten home slate includes jNW, OSU, Michigan, and Wisky. Their road slate is at Indy, at Purdue, at PSU, and at Minnesota.
They don’t play Iowa, MSU, Nebby. Their most difficult stretch of games is probably October 15th thru November 19th, when they host OSU, then play at Purdue and at PSU, then come back to Champaign for Michigan and Wisky.
Their non-conference opponents are: Arky State, S Dakota St, Ariz St, and W Michigan (none of these teams has made a bowl game since 2008, although SDSU made the FCS playoffs in 2009). The Illini don’t even play Mizzou in St. Louis this year.
What a god-damned joke!
http://espn.go.com/college-football/team/schedule/_/id/356/illinois-fighting-illini
We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.
If the Zook
doesn’t have a winning season with that schedule, do you think he is out at Illinois?
I think this season could be his downfall. If he gets Illinois to a bowl game, I beleive he survives for another 2 years. If he has a losing season, he is out after this year.
All my good friends at BHGP helpled pick this most awesome name!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! - Jim Zabel
by Bloodpunch's Barbasol on Jul 29, 2011 8:34 AM CDT up reply actions

























