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To Catch a Predator, Part One

Tcaptitle_medium

Stone_phillips_medium Good evening.  I'm Stone Phillips, and this is Dateline NBC.
Stone_phillips_medium Once again, the crew from Perverted Justice are pursuing online predators.
Stone_phillips_medium With the results of their latest sting, here's Chris Hansen.
Chris_hansen_medium You've seen our investigations of child predators before, but never quite like this.
Chris_hansen_medium Never before have we caught so many creepy predators.
Chris_hansen_medium Never before have the predators we caught been so famous.
Chris_hansen_medium After our last operation, our friends at Perverted Justice decided we needed a slightly different scenario to avoid potential predators discovering our operation.  
Chris_hansen_medium So here is what they did: They created a fifteen year-old football recruit named "Brian Allen."  Brian is supposed to be a 6'1" 250 pound offensive lineman.  He's actually being played by one of our Perverted Justice decoys.  To make him as tempting as possible to predators, we gave him a scholarship offer from Iowa.  Our decoy made a couple of posts on Rivals message boards to see who would respond.
Chris_hansen_medium Our first predator goes by the screen name "ReamerClub" and responded to the Rivals post almost immediately.
Chris_hansen_medium He first asked our decoy "have u evr played b4?"  Our decoy replied "no but i want 2" and ReamerClub replied "so ur a fb virgin lol" before saying "Id let u play 4 me"
Chris_hansen_medium He asked our decoy "what iz ur favorit position?" When the decoy said "I dunno" ReamerClub said "I imagine u can play a lot of positionz".
Chris_hansen_medium He also talked a lot about trains.
Chris_hansen_medium After two days of back-and-forth, ReamerClub said he'd come over for an in-home visit.  Our crew and NCAA compliance officers set up at our decoy house and waited.

Star-divide

Hope_icon_medium /drives up to house
Brian_allen_icon_medium Hey! Come on inside!
Brian_allen_icon_medium Mom is making meatloaf for later!
Hope_icon_medium That sounds great!  It's been a long trip.
Brian_allen_icon_medium Go ahead and make yourself a drink.  I'm just going to go move some laundry to the dryer.
Hope_icon_medium /pours club soda, sips
Chris_hansen_medium How's that drink?
Hope_icon_medium It's good.  Very good.  Not boilermaker good, but not much is heh heh
Hope_icon_medium Are you Brian's dad?
Chris_hansen_medium Oh, we'll get to who I am later.  Let's talk.  What's your name?
Hope_icon_medium Danny.
Chris_hansen_medium Danny, have a seat there.

Tcap_hope_medium

Chris_hansen_medium What are you doing here, Danny?
Hope_icon_medium Recuiting Brian, I guess.
Chris_hansen_medium Recruiting Brian? Is that what we're calling it now?  And how did you meet Brian?
Hope_icon_medium We chatted online.
Chris_hansen_medium What did you chat about?
Hope_icon_medium Football and stuff.
Chris_hansen_medium Did Brian tell you how old he was?
Hope_icon_medium I believe he told me he was...mumbleteen.
Chris_hansen_medium Fifteen.
Hope_icon_medium Fifteen?
Chris_hansen_medium FIFTEEN, DANNY.  You were chatting with a fifteen year old.
Hope_icon_medium I don't remember him saying he was fifteen.
Chris_hansen_medium I have the transcript here.  It says fifteen.
Chris_hansen_medium So what are you doing chatting on the internet with a fifteen year old?
Hope_icon_medium I don't know.  I just have this insatiable need to talk to teenagers about football.
Chris_hansen_medium How old are you, Danny?
Hope_icon_medium I'm 52.
Chris_hansen_medium You're fifty two! Do you think that's appropriate?
Hope_icon_medium It's just part of my job, sir.
Chris_hansen_medium What do you do?
Hope_icon_medium I'm a football coach.
Chris_hansen_medium So you work with young people like Brian, and yet you also engage in behavior like this.
Chris_hansen_medium Where did you drive from?
Hope_icon_medium West Lafayette, Indiana.
Chris_hansen_medium How far was your trip?
Hope_icon_medium About three hours.
Chris_hansen_medium You drove three hours to meet this boy?
Hope_icon_medium Yeah, I did.
Chris_hansen_medium Have you done this before?
Hope_icon_medium Many times.  I do this all summer.
Chris_hansen_medium So what did you plan on doing when you got here?
Hope_icon_medium I don't know, just talk about football.
Chris_hansen_medium Talk about football?  You drove three hours to talk to a fifteen year old about football?
Hope_icon_medium Yeah.  I just wanted to hang out.  Maybe see if Brian wanted to play for me.
Chris_hansen_medium Well, the transcript shows you certainly wanted Brian to "play for you".  You offered him scholarships, a free room, his choice of starting position.  This is raunchy stuff, Danny.
Hope_icon_medium That's pretty par for the course for me.
Chris_hansen_medium Did you really think you'd get a fifteen year old to "play for you" Danny?  Look at yourself.  You're wearing a tank top.  You have that creepy mustache.  You're from a town that doesn't actually exist.  You coach for a Mid-American Conference school...
Hope_icon_medium Actually, Purdue is in the Big Ten.
Chris_hansen_medium Yeah, sure they are.
Chris_hansen_medium Well, Danny, my name is Chris Hansen, and I'm doing a piece for Dateline NBC on online predators like you.  So unless you have something else to say to our cameras, you're free to go.

Hope_icon_medium I guess all I have to say is, Boiler Up!

Chris_hansen_medium I think you should go now.
Chris_hansen_medium [voiceover] Little does Danny know that our NCAA compliance officers are in position outside.

Swat_team_medium

Hope_icon_medium /gets up, walks outside
Swat_team_icon_medium FREEZE
Hope_icon_medium /puts hands up
Swat_team_icon_medium /fires taser, misses, hits coach from small college instead
Chris_hansen_medium When we return, a thirtysomething bachelor shows up looking for a tackle, if you know what I mean.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Comment 30 comments  |  18 recs  | 

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More from Black Heart Gold Pants

To Catch A Predator, Part Two

May 2011 by Adam Jacobi - 46 comments

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Comments

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I figured it was only a matter of time

Considering all of the #tcap that gets talked about around here. Recd

by mikjones24 on May 12, 2011 11:06 AM CDT reply actions  

Haha, Reamer Club rides again!

Thanks for this.

Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.

by Kyle McCann't on May 12, 2011 11:19 AM CDT reply actions  

So much funny!

Ab workout for the day is complete.

Going, going, going, going, going, going, going, going.... Alright, I'll stop for now.

by EnergizerHawk on May 12, 2011 11:20 AM CDT reply actions  

Nice

"Live a lie, and you will live to regret it"
James William Buffett Jr. 1988 (That's What Living is to Me)

by letsgopsu on May 12, 2011 11:33 AM CDT reply actions  

Funny story:

I’ve seen Danny Hope wear that EXACT outfit on campus before.

by BoilerHawk on May 12, 2011 11:39 AM CDT reply actions  

"I don't know, just talk about football"

Many of our fans have a sneaking suspicion that statement is Hope’s coaching philosophy.

Also, it’s 100% certain that the tazer prongs struck the small college coach in the ACL.

by Mattdsm on May 12, 2011 11:40 AM CDT up reply actions  

Poor, poor Pete Lembo.

"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"

by RossWB on May 12, 2011 11:45 AM CDT up reply actions  

The LAPD SWAT team wears purple?

No wonder they couldn’t find Notorious B.I.G.’s killer.

/justNorthwestern’d

by SWRT on May 12, 2011 12:41 PM CDT reply actions  

I. HATE. PURDUE.

"GO HAWKS!" - only cure for Hawkeye Envy

by BentNotBroken on May 12, 2011 12:52 PM CDT reply actions   2 recs

I hope Chris corners Pat Fitzgerald

and his “magic potato” in a future episode.

Excuse me for my bellicosity. And spelling. Bellicosity and spelling.

by Blackheartnopants on May 12, 2011 12:59 PM CDT reply actions  

/fires taser, misses, hits coach from small college instead

/laughs, cries because it’s true/

Maize n Brew
Because Football is Better with Beer

by Maize n Brew Dave on May 12, 2011 3:36 PM CDT reply actions  

I can't wait for the TCAP episode...

where they catch Tressel and his conquests going out to get tats and hang with drug dealers.

You know Tressel will be the guy who breaks down, cries his eyes out, and says “I’m so disappointed in myself. If you’d just let me take a 5-game suspension, I promise I’ll never do it again.”

We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.

by WaterlooChazz on May 12, 2011 4:43 PM CDT reply actions  

...and then they confiscate his vest and find that he has

hundreds of roofie-laced suckers strapped on the inside.

Der Hoelle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen

by Lycurgus on May 12, 2011 8:52 PM CDT up reply actions  

Every sucker looks like this:

We will become more intensity!!! --What Reading Rambler thinks Tom Brands should do.

by WaterlooChazz on May 12, 2011 9:52 PM CDT up reply actions  

"He also talked a lot about trains."

This is so good. So very good.

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.
- Woody Hayes

by Culp's Freaking Hill on May 13, 2011 12:10 PM CDT reply actions  

So I looked up Culp's Hill, and all I can say is

if you aren’t actually Rambler, then you and Rambler should talk. You might not want to invite Lycurgus though (he’s good people, but you might not like his Civil War views).

by Eyeheartfreedumb on May 15, 2011 9:06 AM CDT up reply actions  

I am not Rambler.

I’m a high school history teacher who mostly cares about Revolutionary America to Reconstruction. I’ll have to talk to them. I’m open to hear anyone’s thoughts or favorites on the subject as long as they are supported by fact and alcohol.

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.
- Woody Hayes

by Culp's Freaking Hill on May 15, 2011 3:29 PM CDT up reply actions  

Do you read James McPherson?

Der Hoelle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen

by Lycurgus on May 15, 2011 5:51 PM CDT up reply actions  

I have not yet read anything by him.

I’m a first year high school teacher, so I have zero time on my hands. I have a list of books I’ll be reading this summer…a suggestion or two?

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.
- Woody Hayes

by Culp's Freaking Hill on May 17, 2011 10:11 AM CDT up reply actions  

He'll have a dozen or two suggestions.

Lycurgus is well read. I’ve taken a couple suggestions so far and they’ve been damn good.

I spent half my life's earnings on wine, women & song. The other half I wasted.

by therealCatnuts on May 17, 2011 10:19 AM CDT up reply actions  

I haven't read much of his stuff, but he is really good

Try “This Mighty Scourge”, which is a collection of essays he has written on different aspects of the civil war.

“Tried by War” is another one that I have been meaning to read.

Der Hoelle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen

by Lycurgus on May 17, 2011 11:05 AM CDT up reply actions  

I don't think I have controversial Civil War views.

I am ardently pro-Union and would just like to point out that Pennsylvania never fielded a senior citizens brigade.

Der Hoelle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen

by Lycurgus on May 15, 2011 5:53 PM CDT up reply actions  

Sure they did

It’s called the Philadelphia Eagles.

Before you respond, let me remind you: Brian Cook called me smug, which makes me the Obama of smugness. I'm basically Smugbama.

by Patrick Vint on May 16, 2011 8:48 AM CDT up reply actions  

Oh, how could I forget

Their jobs are even roughly the same, guarding prisoners of war.

Der Hoelle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen

by Lycurgus on May 16, 2011 10:35 AM CDT up reply actions  

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