(clapping hands) Alright guys, let's bring it in. Let's bring it in. Now today's an important day, we need to bring our A-games. We need to be smart, we need to be mistake free and we need to execute.
Dad, it's just Thanksgiving dinner. We don't need the pep talk.
The Ferentz family sits around the family table
Kirk, do you want to say the prayer?
Yeah, sure... Dear God, we are thankful for all that you have given us - the stretch zone, the 4-3 defense, Wrigley's Spear-o-Mint gum, Marcus Coker, punting...
Dad, can we concentrate more on the family?
Okay. Thank you for blessing us with good health, James has been free of injuries all year and he has played well, in fact his...
Wow, thanks Dad. That means...
...comeback victory against Pittsburgh was one of the highlights of the season. God, do you remember him throwing that last touchdown to Kevonte? Boy what a strike.
... a lot.
Marcus has also been healthy throughout the year and so has Marvin. Lord, you have blessed us so much, but you have also tested us this year. Mika'il and the whole Factbook thing, what was that? Granting Steele Jantz superpowers for one game? Continuing to confound me with special teams? But you know what, I'm just going to chalk that up to a failure in execution and I know you'll be better next week.
Amen. Let's eat.
Now, what to have first?
We want the ball first.
Dad. Thanksgiving. Not football.
Sorry, let's have some of that delicious turkey.
Ten minutes pass
(clapping hands): Now that was a great turkey, good job Mom. Keep it up. Offers hand.
(shaking hand) Ummm thanks honey.
James! Quit hogging all the rolls, other people at the table might want some.
I'm just trying to find the biggest one, you'll get them, don't worry.
Hey, what going on down there?
James has been holding the rolls for like 10 minutes
Holding?! That's a terrible call. You keep quiet all dinner and then you call that holding? Come here.
What is it?
I need an explanation. Tell me what you saw.
Ummmm James has been holding onto the basket of rolls for about five minutes, digging through and looking for the biggest one. Hell, he's still holding it now.
Okay, okay. Good call. Good call.
Oops, spilled some gravy on my shirt.
*snort* Writes in notebook
The meal is finished and a stuffed family sits at the table
Grandma, Mom that was delicious.
Yeah, thanks. Nothing beats a home cooked meal.
Alright, who is ready for pie?
Well, we had a good dinner today. There were a few mistakes along the way, but overall it was a good meal for this team and one we truly needed. I'm not about to rub this win in Thanksgiving's face, we may not be the sexiest outfit around, but we got the job done today and that's what matters. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to answer the media's questions in the living room.
I guess that's a no.
Overheard in the living room
Kirk, you are looking extra handsome today. Tell me about that win out there today and be succinct as possible.
It was a good win. We ate well in all three phases today - turkey, stuffing and potatoes - and now we put that behind us and get ready for Christmas.
(quietly) Is somebody going to confront him about the headset? He's been wearing it all day and now its covered in food and starting to smell.
We've got to stop playing on Fridays.