After watching the Iowa-Arizona game last night, I feel like I need to make a few things clear, and I think I can say these things on behalf of many other football fans. So here we go.
When I sit down and turn on the TV to watch the game, I want to watch the fucking GAME.
I do NOT want to watch an endless series of features about the players and their families. I do NOT want to watch the idiot announcers standing in front of a blue screen chatting. I do NOT want scenic panoramas of the stadium. I do NOT want to watch the end of the fucking Notre Dame game 40 fucking times while you refer to it as a fucking "update."
I want to watch the fucking GAME.
I want to watch every fucking play, from the beginning to the end. I do NOT want to join the play in progress because some idiot producer thought it was more important to show a feature on our historical ineptitude when traveling west. I do NOT want to join the play in progress because that same idiot producer wanted to show Mike Stoops acting like, well, Mike Stoops, for the fiftieth fucking time in the last fifteen minutes.
When you do finally get around to showing a little of the game, I do NOT want to watch the play from behind the fucking goal posts. I do NOT want to watch it from a camera swooping in on sort of jib. And I do NOT want to watch the game as a series of closeups.
You are NOT filming a movie. You are broadcasting a fucking football game.
Tell your camera people to find the fucking "pan out" control and pan the fuck out. A closeup of a ball in midair is NOT the same thing as showing the fucking game. Neither is a closeup of a receiver running with the ball. I do NOT want to have to wonder where the defender came from when he shows up from the edge of the fucking screen for a tackle. I want you to pan the fuck out so I can see the fucking field and watch the fucking game.
The game is not a fucking sideshow. Your fucking sideshow of video features and statistics is not the fucking game. Get that straight. Just because you lack the seniority to avoid getting shipped out to the desert for a game in the middle of the fucking night doesn’t mean that it’s time to compete for some sort of fucking Emmy award for fucking Cinematography.
Show the fucking game. Even when the game sucks.