FanPost

Minnesota Introduces Their Curious New Head Coach

This afternoon, the University of Minnesota and Athletic Director Joel Maturi introduced their new head football coach...

2oqj_medium After a thorough search, myself and the trustees and board members decided unanimously on a new football coach for the University of Minnesota this weekend. The qualities we were searching for are self-evident when you meet our new coach; staunch morals, an aversion to those who seek to suppress him, sometimes-diabolic creativity and a natural ability to bring electricity to the football field with his squad. Without further ado, I would like to introduce the new head coach for the Minnesota Golden Gopher football team... Coach Fester Addams.

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"No mercy, trustees! Aim for the artery! The jugular!"

Unless otherwise expressly indicated by BHGP editors, this FanPost is strictly the viewpoint of the author and is not endorsed by BHGP in any way.

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