When A 'New Cyclone Logo' Post Starts Like This...
by Adam Jacobi on Oct 21, 2010 9:30 AM CDT
in Iowa Hawkeyes Football
Email
Print
Concept 1: "Contemplative Tornado-Burping Skeletor"
...you know it's going to be a good day.
Our bros at Barking Carnival--specifically one Fake Ken Tremendous, which, I mean, "Ken Tremendous" is already a pen name to begin with--put themselves in the mind of Jamie Pollard as the ISU AD envisions an ambitious rebranding of their timeless classic iconic participation-ribbon-earning logo and mascot. What ensues is the finest discussion and envisionation of what it means to be a Cyclone that ISU has seen in forever years. Seriously, both the writing and the Beyond Photoshopping are some of the funniest things we've seen all season long.
And no, Pollard doesn't get inconsolable. BC doesn't wear Black Heart Ripoff Pants; they just caught him on a "up" day, is all. Also, the example shown above is the least ridiculous of their logo options. WHy are you still reading this? Click the link already! DO ITTTTT.
47 comments
|
0 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
Before I read the link, lemme share a germane picture:
This is what I saw in the golf course tailgate area just south of Michigan Stadium on Saturday:
This child of a man was playing bags with a friend in the same shirt. They probably had no clue who the Cyclones were playing that day.
/Was thinking about a medical-intervention commercial-style fanpost: “Talk to your doctor if you have any of these symptoms of Little Brother Syndrome (LBS).” But I thought I should share this right away.
P.S. . . .
I blatantly took three pictures of him. He looked up at the end and said “what the fuck are you doing”. My drunken self (normally a conflict-avoiding kind of guy), gave him the disdaining look I could muster and walked away.
by The Final Gun on Oct 21, 2010 10:00 AM CDT up reply actions
I don't believe that's a real ISU fan.
They sunglasses, the carefully mussed hair, the jaunty angle he’s holding that beer can at… that is a dirty fucking hipster. He might be anti-Iowa, but he knows that blatantly pimping Michigan is too mainstream, but wearing ISU gear at a Michigan tailgate is the alt thing to do. I mean, that shirt looks brand new and the jeans are way too clean. If that was a real ISU fan, there’d be, like, fertilizer stains on them, right?
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
by RossWB on Oct 21, 2010 10:24 AM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
If he were a real ISU fan
He would have the decency to not wear an ISU shirt near a game where ISU was not competing*. Because only assholes do stuff like that.
- You could argue that that includes Jack Trice, but you get my meaning.
"If you need a rah-rah speech at halftime, you’re playing the wrong sport." - Pat Angerer
Crap. Work filter blocks it.
It will have to wait until tonight.
Guess what?! I got a fever, and the only prescription...is more cowbell!!
by The Bird Cult on Oct 21, 2010 3:52 PM CDT up reply actions
Also...
It appears as though his lady-friend might be drinking more than he is.
Dude is an absolute amateur.
I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.
-- Judge Smails
by WaterlooChazz on Oct 21, 2010 4:22 PM CDT up reply actions
six-armed cardinal tornado bodybuilder with fire-breathing medusa snakes for hair running over count chocula in a sherman tank with “how’s my driving” bumper sticker while carrying bags of money is the best college logo ever.
Brunettes not fighter jets
Tasmanian Devil
Why don’t they just go with the Tasmanian Devil and be done with it. It is the perfect synergy between an anthropomorphic animal and a tornado. It is also probably the most recognizable pop culture usage of a tornado.
Because Warner Bros. would sue the pants off them.
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
Ah, but Jamie Pollard has pants.
Sad pants, but pants nonetheless.
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
Those pants were filled during conference expansionalooza.
by HawkeyeRecon on Oct 21, 2010 12:41 PM CDT up reply actions
He ran out of that.
He had to resort to number one by the time it was all over.
"Yeah, and that’s bullshit, cause Boise plays Kirkwood every other weekend".
Smokin' Herb Grigsby's Mom (+1, I say)
Warner Bros wouldn't want his pants
they’re just too damn inconsolable.
They’d just crucify him instead.
I'll take "The Penis Mightier" for $500, Trebek.
Flamingo Gargamel is both timeless and tragic.
If that doesn’t sum up Iowa State athletics I don’t know what does.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
I don't know...
“Fraternity Pledge Tornadoctopus Leering Up an Anime Schoolgirl’s Skirt" is a pretty all-encompassing description of Iowa State and its fans.
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
Eustachy is gone.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 21, 2010 10:25 AM CDT up reply actions
Not in my heart.
"I want to be a cowboy. I don't want to be a panda. Pandas are boring, stupid and boring. Bad panda!"
Eustachy is like the coyote ugly girl we all woke up with in college
You just will never get those images out of your head.
Guess what?! I got a fever, and the only prescription...is more cowbell!!
by The Bird Cult on Oct 21, 2010 12:12 PM CDT up reply actions
ISU fans ...
Totally into anime porn. Totally.
Excuse me for my bellicosity. And spelling. Bellicosity and spelling.
by Blackheartnopants on Oct 21, 2010 11:17 AM CDT up reply actions
Please.
Japornamation.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 21, 2010 12:38 PM CDT up reply actions
Actually...
…I believe its called Hentai. And yes I did just google that on my work computer, risking horrible images to surface on my temp internet files, to make sure I was spelling it right.
Am I missing something?
What did Count Chocula do to deserve this? I can see that prick Boo-Berry, but not the Count.
Who's leg do I have to hump to get a drink around here?-Brian
Except part of what made Boo Berry such a prick
is that you could never find him. Chocula and Frankenberry were always hangin’ out in your cereal aisle, but Boo Berry was always the mythical box of cereal that the ads had told you existed but you were yet to actually see.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 21, 2010 10:27 AM CDT up reply actions
Iowa State's new, perfect logo:
"Let's get your chili hot!"
Beat Minnesota
by ReadingRambler on Oct 21, 2010 11:24 AM CDT reply actions
“There’s an Iowa State?”
"Let's get your chili hot!"
Beat Minnesota
by ReadingRambler on Oct 21, 2010 11:27 AM CDT up reply actions
I see what you did there.
"If you're easily offended, we thank you for stopping by but ask that you turn your browser elsewhere." -- BHGP Disclaimer
by SaturdayMorningKegStanzis on Oct 21, 2010 11:32 AM CDT up reply actions
Maybe Hawking-like Iowa State can create a new Iowa State out of nothing
Guess what?! I got a fever, and the only prescription...is more cowbell!!
by The Bird Cult on Oct 21, 2010 12:11 PM CDT up reply actions
Uhhh, no. It is not.
the same kind of kick-ass tank that Uncle Sam used to tear Saddam Hussein a new spider hole.
I guess they don’t have a history department at Iowa State.
"If you need a rah-rah speech at halftime, you’re playing the wrong sport." - Pat Angerer
Or Texas?
"Let's get your chili hot!"
Beat Minnesota
by ReadingRambler on Oct 21, 2010 11:48 AM CDT up reply actions
Anyone who wasn't already on board
must now certainly admit that Purdue is OMHR. Seriously…they would never have the creative cajones to pull something like this off. I mean let’s be honest…the (almost) World’s Largest Drum…really?
You just don't fuck with Skeletor
Although Frank Langella might kick Pollard’s ass if they start using Skeletor. I mean, that’s dissing one of Frank’s best movie roles ever.
Guess what?! I got a fever, and the only prescription...is more cowbell!!
Who in god's name would wanna run over Count Chocula?!
Him and Booberry were are best friends with my childhood.
Templeton Rye'd the Lightning.
by Smokin Herb Grigsby on Oct 21, 2010 5:59 PM CDT reply actions
How about the Monopoly guy riding a cow that happens to be playing a gigantic sousaphone that's shooting out a tornado with Spot, Q-Bert and The Noid
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Oct 21, 2010 9:11 PM CDT reply actions 6 recs
Winner. The combo of The Noid, Spot, and Q-Bert did me in...
I laughed so hard, I shit my pants a little.
I'll take "The Penis Mightier" for $500, Trebek.
I think Jamie Pollard actually was the Noid.
He even sounds like him.
Here is Pollard’s plan for a domed roof over Trice Stadium:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZD5gMsy-nuc&feature=related
I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.
-- Judge Smails
by WaterlooChazz on Oct 21, 2010 10:25 PM CDT up reply actions
Goddamnit.
It was already hilarious until I saw Q-Bert.
Templeton Rye'd the Lightning.
by Smokin Herb Grigsby on Oct 22, 2010 12:46 AM CDT up reply actions
I am so happy right now.
If I were to be sent this pic on Christmas morning I wouldn’t require any other gifts. Seriously, I’m giggling uncontrollably.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 23, 2010 2:29 AM CDT up reply actions
Perhaps, the Noid should avoid Pollard. His career is already in the drain, this would just seal his cheesy, cardboard coffin. Plus, I’m pretty sure Adam West killed the Noid…
by Amidgitinatruck on Oct 23, 2010 8:34 AM CDT reply actions
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
Related FanPosts on Black Heart Gold Pants
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
