FanPost

Patriot Games: Part II

  ... continued from Patriot Games: Part I ...

On a dimly lit dock outside of Gary, Indiana...

Stanziicon_medium Ok... this seems like the kinda place Commander Belichick was describing for where Codename "P.P." would be found...

Iconclayborn_medium I dunno, Rick... This place seems pretty damn quiet. We should probably move on. Besides, Jeff said he was gonna be meeting us ov...

Iconace_medium ARF ARF ARF/ *urinates on nearby trash pile*

Stanziicon_medium Come on, AC... Ace. We've barely been here for 5 minutes. Let's just stake it out a little longer and see what happens... I brought you guys along to provide some support... not complain all the time!!!

Iconclayborn_medium Alright, Rick... Alright. This just doesn't seem like the kind of place a terrorist would smug...

... a short distance away on the pier, a figure emerges from the darkness barking commands...

1c8r_medium HURRY UP, YOU THUGS!!! THE SERBIANS SAID THEIR CORRESPONDENT WOULD BE MEETING US SHORTLY. BOILER UP.

1ead_medium Sir, yes sir!!

... back at the hiding spot of our heroes...

Stanziicon_medium Holy Hancock's Signature, AC!!! There he is!! And they're meeting a Serbian to get the weapon materials!!

Iconclayborn_medium This doesn't look good, Ricky. We're outnumbered even if Jeff shows up...

Iconace_medium ARFARF

Stanziicon_medium Just calm down, guys. Jeff will get here in time. We have to lay out a plan while we wait though. Let's lie low, wait for this Serbian to show up, and sneak up to snatch Codename "P.P." when when they're occupied while making the transaction... Look, I think that's the guy!!

1c8r_medium AH, SO YOU FINALLY DECIDED TO SHOW UP. YOU SERBIANS AND YOUR TARDINESS ARE BOILING ME UP.

1eaw_medium Ve are not Serbians, Purdue Petr. Ve have been over thees before. Ve are Moldovans. Ve like to get saxy.

1c8r_medium WHATEVER, A COMMUNIST IS A COMMUNIST. I DON'T LIKE THE SAXOPHONE ANYWAY. WHERE IS THE PLUTONIUM?!?!

1eaw_medium *pelvic thrusts in the direction of small boat* Zee secret plutonium filled dingy ees over there, Purdue Petr!!!

1c8r_medium AH, I SEE IT. BOILERBOYS!!! GET TO THAT DINGY!!!

Stanziicon_medium AC, Ace... this could be our chance, let's get ready to bag Codename "P.P." while his cronies and Epic Sax Guy are busy.

Iconclayborn_medium Alright, let's do this. I'm not gonna let these terrorist bastards smuggle anything into our country, right Ace?!

Iconace_medium ARF

Stanziicon_medium That's the American spirit guys... Ok,Ready?... ooooone...

1ead_medium ...Sir, which dingy do you speak of, sir?! There are several!!!...

Stanziicon_medium ...Twoooooo...

1c8r_medium THE MOLDOVAN SAID THE COVERED ONE HAS THE PLUTONIUM!!! NO, THE COVERED ONE, YOU IMBECILES!!!

Stanziicon_medium ...Thr...

1c8r_medium THE ONE WITH THE TARP.

1ebd_medium Did someone say TARP!?!?!

Ackbarcollar2_medium IT'S A TARP

Stanziicon_medium IT'S A TARP

Iconclayborn_medium IT'S A TARP

Iconace_medium ARFARF TARP

1eaw_medium DOO. DOO-DUH-DUH DOO DOOOO DOO.

1ebd_medium *Swooshes through pier like a missile, tying up the cronies in one fell swoop* Sorry I was late RIcky, AC, Ace!! Now let's bag that Commie bastard, Purdue Pete!!

Stanziicon_medium Now you've got no one to back you up, Purdue Pete!! Your plutonium boiling days are over!!

1c8r_medium *while being tied up* DAGNABBIT. I KNEW I COUDN'T RELY ON THOSE BAND KIDS OR THE MOLDOVAN. YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, HAWKEYES!!! YOU'LL SEE!!!! YOUR MOST HATED RIVAL WILL GET YOU FOR THIS!!! *dragged away by our hero's compatriots*

... meanwhile...

31uxyzg4zvl WHOOSHWHOOSHWHOOSHWHOOSH

Stanziicon_medium That must be Commander Belichick!!!

 

1wkq_medium *jumping off chopper* Stanzi... You and your boys have done a fantastic job. Purdue Pete and his maniacal world domination ideas have no chance against America. When will these commies ever learn.

Stanziicon_medium We sure taught those Boilers a message, didn't we Commander Belichick!?

1wkq_medium Sure did, Stanzi. Sure did. Now, since you've performed admirably under the conditions given and impressed all the way to the top... about that reward we were talking about...

... some time later, in late April of 2011...

1ecf_medium ... The New England Patriots select... Ricky Stanzi... Quarterback, Iowa.

1wkq_medium Welcome aboard, Stanzi. Now you are a tried and true Patriot.

Stanziicon_medium Love it or leave, Commander Belichick!! Love it or leave it!!

Unless otherwise expressly indicated by BHGP editors, this FanPost is strictly the viewpoint of the author and is not endorsed by BHGP in any way.