Jewel Hampton Needs Knee Surgery, Out For Year; Brinson Also Out For UNI Game

by Oops Pow Surprise on Sep 1, 2009 1:45 PM CDT in Football Comment 27 comments

Good night, funny man.

No, it's not good at all. But at least it's official: Jewel Hampton is out for 2009 and will almost certainly redshirt.

Such news was confirmed at Kirk Ferentz's press conference this afternoon, and we're working on getting a good link on a transcript (either full or sensibly trimmed) for you folks. In the meantime, there's Hawkeye Nation's liveblog (the presser itself starts at 12:38) for your perusal.

Hampton evidently injured the knee on July 4, when the rumors started floating, but he was making his way back and even practicing before it became evident that he would need surgery to actually fix the problem. For whatever reason, Ferentz isn't specifying what's injured, just that surgery is necessary. Not really sure what Ferentz is trying to protect by staying vague, unless he doesn't know the exact injury (which, to be perfectly honest, shouldn't matter to him as much as the fact that he's out). Hampton should be out of commission for next spring's practice as well, but right now he's expected to return at full speed for 2010.

As for Jeff Brinson stepping in? Yes, well, about that... no. He's still recovering from some Fujiya & Miyagi style ankle injuries, and he's out for the week. That means PAKI BOMB IS A GO. Batten down the hatches.

As far as other "highlights":

Adam Robinson has quietly improved and looked nice in all areas, meaning he's #2 on the depth chart. We're a little skeptical about this, but he didn't look terrible at the open practice.
As expected, the Irish Car Bomb is done after back surgery. Godspeed.
Ferentz wants the Bryan Bulaga-to-the-NFL talk to wait until after the season. In other words, barring injuries, he's as likely to come back as Norm Parker's two toes.
Despite the team's best efforts, they couldn't hide the fact that true freshmen will actually play next week; Brandon Wegher, Keenan Davis, and Micah Hyde are expected to see significant time. No real surprises there.
Colin Sandeman may or may not play this week.
DJK has been dinged up and has missed three complete days of practice, which might be part of the reason why he's not starting per the 2-deeps.
Oh, and Paki O'Meara is also returning kicks as of today even with his starting role confirmed. Interesting.

Well, today had to come sooner or later, we guess. No more questions about Hampton until next season; now it's Brinson's ankle and whether he can work his way ahead of O'Meara and Robinson. If he can't, um, that's probably not a good sign, right?

Also... what does this do to your expectations for this Saturday?

Poll

Where are you setting the line for the UNI game?

Iowa by at least 42

34 votes

Iowa by 28-41

136 votes

Iowa by 14-27

269 votes

Iowa by 1-13

63 votes

UNI wins

45 votes

547 votes | Poll has closed

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Comments

Do we still have the 2004 playbook lying around?

We can totally have another magically flukey season like that again, right? Paki will be like a better version of Brownlee!

Alternatively, is it too late to bring back Shonn? Maybe he was kidding about the NFL thing.

by NorseHawk on Sep 1, 2009 1:55 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Potent Potables

Since starting a walkon probably makes you want to drink, I give you the PakiBomb:

Ingredients:
1 750ml bottle Belvidere Vodka
1 750ml bottle Smirnoff Vodka
1 plastic bottle of Mr. Boston vodka that someone left at your house after a party a couple of years ago.

How to make:
1. Prepare to start with the Belvidere vodka by unscrewing the cap.
2. Have a small taste of the Belvidere then screw the cap back on.
3. Aw crap, the cap broke and now it won’t close properly. Well, it still should be OK in a few weeks, right?
4. Prepare to drink the Smirnoff, it’s should be fine for the purposes, it should be no worse than average.
5. Dammit, you can’t get the cap off of the Smirnoff, something’s wrong with it..
6. Come to the realization you might actually have to drink that Mr. Boston, but figure that Belvidere is probably still fine to drink.
7. Go back to the Belvidere.
8. Drop the Belvidere bottle on the floor, shattering it into hundreds of pieces and losing the entire contents of the bottle.
9. Try with all your might to get the cap off of that Smirnoff bottle but again, fail in the attempt.
10. Realize the Smirnoff still isn’t available and reach for the bottle of Mr. Boston.
11. Commence chugging.

by Yinka Double Dare on Sep 1, 2009 2:03 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs

Brocktoon Vodka?

I should want to write a fan letter to Mr. Belvedere.
I should not write it on the back of a death certificate.
And also I should not want to bash Jewel Hampton’s knee in with a broken bottle of Brocktoon Vodka.

by HawkeyePapyrus on Sep 1, 2009 2:30 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I like Beacon of Bliss vodka.

I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks

by Oops Pow Surprise on Sep 1, 2009 2:35 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Sorry, I’m not familiar with whatever the horrible cheapo vodka is in Iowa, so I went with the best combo of bad plastic-bottle vodka with goofy name that I knew of. Mr. Boston was victorious over Wolfschmidt.

I would have used Jewel of Russia Vodka instead of Belvidere but figured it was too much of an obscure premium vodka brand and people would have thought I was making it up.

by Yinka Double Dare on Sep 1, 2009 2:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I'm pretty sure

Hawkeye Vodka is the cheapest vodka swill you can get in the IC area. Conveniently, it can also double as paint thinner if you’re in a pinch.

by RossWB on Sep 1, 2009 3:29 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs

Do people who are not in high school actually drink Hawkeye?

Because, no, don’t do that.

by NorseHawk on Sep 1, 2009 5:08 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I knew a few desperate souls in undergrad who drank it.

And somehow they even lived to see the next morning.

by RossWB on Sep 1, 2009 6:06 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Sure, they lived

but they weren’t happy about it

It never gets to be easy

by chitownhawkeye on Sep 1, 2009 6:28 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

we drank Hawkey Vodka

Tailgating b4 the purdont game last year, right b4 the cops decided we could not have a wood fire @ Finkbine to cook breakfast.

this place smells like feet. i’ll bring a can of lysol next week.

by pfac51 on Sep 1, 2009 6:51 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions 0 recs

Shaker's Vodka is the bomb.

by storminspank on Sep 2, 2009 10:07 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

And reasonably priced.

But the best “cheap” vodka on the market has to be Tito’s Homemade. An $18 bottle that doesn’t take like gasoline, fantastic.

Hit him with your groin!

by The Mexican't on Sep 2, 2009 10:15 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I believe it's time to see

the team rally around the PakiBomb…er, Swinging Dick I mean.

"When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you don't know." Bill Parcells

by StoopsMyAss on Sep 1, 2009 2:08 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

At least

Merkle’s has all you can eat/drink on Saturday for the football game. I’ll get my $30 worth of booze watching DAS-PAKIBOMB playing.

They took the bar, the whole damn bar!

by recoveringfratguy on Sep 1, 2009 3:23 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Ditto.

by Bucketochicken on Sep 1, 2009 9:01 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

PAKI FOR HEISMAN

PAKI O’MEARA GONNA MAKE ALL YALL FORGET ABOUT SHONN. 200 YARDS A GAME WITHOUT BREAKIN A SWEAT. SHORTY GOT LOW LOW LOW BUT MAYBE TOO LOW PAKI DONE HURDLED THE BOY. WHAT’S THAT NOISE A DAMN FREIGHT TRAIN OHNO IT’S PAKI GODDAMN OMEARA RUNNIN THE BALL RUNNIN UP THE SCORE RUNNIN YO ASS UP THE FLAGPOLE RUNNIN ALL THE WAY TO A NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP. PAKI.

by Nefarious on Sep 1, 2009 4:12 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs