BIG TEN MEDIA DAYS: THE RETURN OF BOB ZOOK

by Patrick Vint on Jul 27, 2009 8:00 AM CDT

Guess who's back, mothafuckas?

Ah, like the swallows returning to San Capistrano, not ever knowing the reason for their journey other than subconscious instinct, the Big Ten football coaches make their return to Chicago for Big Ten Media Days, starting today and running through Tuesday's luncheon (which won't be televised until Saturday; after Pat Fitzgerald's unfortunate toast at last year's luncheon, the censors needed some extra time to edit this year's footage).

Many blogs (including SBN stalwarts Maize n' Brew, Hail to the Orange, and Bucky's Fifth Quarter) are going to be in attendance, eagerly transcribing the never-ending string of expectation-reducing nonsense spewing forth from the conference's top dogs. We tried to get credentialed, but were denied when BXI officials learned of our idea to dress up as J Leman and ask every coach for his position statement on text message-based mind control.

That's not to say that the BHGP coverage won't be improved this year; far from it, in fact. First, we're happy to announce the return of BHGP Senior Media Days Correspondent Bob Zook, who arrived in Chicago last night after a four-day hitchhike from Uncle Bob's Self Storage in Pensacola. As always, Bob plans on spending his days asking hard-hitting questions about scent-deficit disorders and his nights regaling the congregated child-supervising MILFs at the Holiday Inn Express indoor pool with stories of his escapades in the Nicaraguan Civil War.

But that's not all. Not only will Bob be filing formal reports from the front lines, but he'll be joining the staff of BHGP on Twitter throughout the day. Follow the action in 140 character bursts from the founding fathers (@BHGP), from the mind of Coach Ferentz (@NotKirkFerentz), and live on site (the all-new @BobZookROLLIN). Festivities kick off at 10:00 CST. We've already been tailgating.

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Ron & Bob's older brother has his own show on the teevee

He gave himself a fake last name, but clearly, he’s big brother Billy. He looks like Ron & Bob, he’s bugshit crazy, and he sweats pure intensity.

by Bucketochicken on Jul 27, 2009 9:58 AM CDT reply actions

Can it be?

The media has picked Michigan State over Iowa in the preseason predictions? Nice. So, apparently a team that is starting an untested QB with 43 attempts in his career and a running back with 90 yards from last year is better than Iowa. It must the be the defense that ranked 60-something nationally which lost several starters which makes them so good, versus our 12th ranked defense that returns all but two players.

"When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you don't know." Bill Parcells

by StoopsMyAss on Jul 27, 2009 11:09 AM CDT reply actions

Can't blame 'em, really.

I mean, MSU is a team that in recent history has ALWAYS lived up to the high expectations placed on them in the preseason …

by Bucketochicken on Jul 27, 2009 11:17 AM CDT up reply actions

I hate to say it, but

the same thing can be said about Iowa. While Iowa, unlike MSU, does typically improve during the course of the season, they have struggled with raised expectations. It seems to me, the years Iowa was picked high have been very disappointing, while the Big 10 Champ. teams were both predicted also rans.

And, while I think this team has the potential to be good, the replacement of the interior lines is still a big question mark. I don’t care how great your tackles are, if the center doesn’t call the right scheme or the guard/center gap is entered more than a two-dollar whore, an offensive is screwed. Similarly, the D-tackles ability to at least occupy the O’s interior lines is one of the keys to Norm’s defensive scheme being successful. If the final DT rotation can’t get that done, the defensive will drop off significantly from last year.

With the question marks and the history of overachievement, I would be perfectly comfortable being projected anywhere from 5 to 8.

Iowa Basketball: We don't rebuild, we implode.

by three and out the kok story on Jul 27, 2009 12:10 PM CDT up reply actions

True enough.

Center definitely concerns me.

by Bucketochicken on Jul 27, 2009 1:26 PM CDT up reply actions

JLS is gone

So are the late-season choke jobs.

That said, I think it’s pretty much a tossup with Iowa for third place. Let’s not forget one huge advantage that MSU has: the schedule (no OSU, most of the upper-middle teams at home).

by SpartanDan on Jul 27, 2009 3:55 PM CDT up reply actions