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Around SBN: Jeremy Lin Continues Rampage, New York Wins On Road

3 Words: Matt Roth

Time to dial the Wayback Machine to where the Legend of Matt Roth really took off: this pitch-perfect Kenny Mayne report about the Iowa Hawkeyes, Ben Roethlisberger, and numbers of words. We would apologize for the video quality, but we didin't upload the thing. Therefore, we demand an immediate and sincere apology from Mr. "ICCSnaredrummer," if that even is his real name.

 

This video is important not for the fact that it's the last time anybody would hear from Jovon Johnson, but because Ben Roethlisberger was just handed a civil suit for sexual assault. One totally unbiased source with the not-at-all-creepy name "Backseat Cuddler" said this (bolded emphasis ours, because it's so true, people, so true):

Ben is facing a mountain of allegations including  civil counts of assault, sexual assault and battery, false imprisonment, false pretenses, fraud, and intentional infliction of emotional distress.  All of which is total BS!

I,  being a HUGE Steelers fan don’t believe it for a second. Not until I see some solid proof. Ben is not that kind of guy. He doesn’t need to assault women. He can get any woman he wants. The Steelers organization is supporting him as well. (As they should.)

 

I sort of feel bad about using BHGP to drive traffic to a trainwreck of an article like that, but he submitted it to Fark with the following headline:

BREAK NEWS Steelers QB Big Ben Roethlisberger SEXUAL Assault SCANDAL

BREAK NEWS! BREAK NEWS! BREAK NEWS!

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He didn't break news...

but he appeard to have sprained it a little.

"I'm not doing any good back here."

by Hawkaloogie on Jul 21, 2009 12:29 PM CDT reply actions  

Funny piece...

…but he had the game wrong. 29-24 was the 2002 Miami road game. The home game in 2003 was 21-3 I believe. Iowa beat Big Ben into submission that day.

by DonnyDonovan on Jul 21, 2009 12:53 PM CDT reply actions  

Yep, Donny,

I pointed that out on a different post. But, you pointed it out first.

Anybody think it is a bit funny that in one of Iowa’s best years (2002) they only won at Miami OH by 5 points? Strange. But, at least we didn’t lose that game.

by WaterlooChazz on Jul 21, 2009 4:05 PM CDT up reply actions  

Well

we also lost to Iowa fucking State in Kinnick that year. It wasn’t all peaches and cream, especially at the start of the season.

Also: the pass defense was, um, not good that year. Fortunately, the run defense was stout and the offense was unstoppable.

Also also: I disagree that that video was the beginning of the legend of Matt Roth. He was definitely a legend in Iowa City long before that.

Also also also: I still fondly remember that game against Miami (OH). That was classic “bend but don’t break” defense.

by RossWB on Jul 21, 2009 5:54 PM CDT up reply actions  

The thing I remember most about the game

Was that it was one of the first time I could remember watching a receiving corps (Miami’s) and say “The whole fucking team has alligator arms.” By the third quarter, no one for Miami wanted to catch a pass because it meant 3 broken ribs and a collapsed lung. I like to think it lead to his 4(?) picks and possibly not being in serious Heisman contention. Let’s face it, he was awesome the rest of that season.

by shada's revenge on Jul 22, 2009 6:54 PM CDT up reply actions  

Yep...

4 picks for Big Ben that day. The Gazette article simply says what you said: that Iowa now “has a defense.”

http://www.gazetteonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/artikkel?NoCache=1&Dato=99999999&Kategori=SPORTS&Lopenr=868230169&Ref=AR

by WaterlooChazz on Jul 22, 2009 9:32 PM CDT up reply actions  

Well

he played for Miami (OH), so I’d say his Heisman hopes were somewhere between “slim” and “none.” But they were definitely toast after we thrashed him. That was the year we killed a few fringe Heisman candidacies… Andrew Walter (Ariz St) got done in a few weeks later and I swear there was some one during B10 season too (though I can’t remember who that might have been now).

by RossWB on Jul 22, 2009 11:44 PM CDT up reply actions  

2003 Big Ten QBs...

would have been: Craig Krenzel, Zack Mills, Jon Navarre, Jeff Smoker, Kyle Orton, Matt LoVecchio, Bret Basanez, Jim Sorgi, Asad Abdul-Khaliq, and Jon Beutjer.

Iowa did not play Indiana or NW, so we did not face Basanez or LoVecchio.

Obviously, Beutjer won the Heisman, so we did not kill his chances.

Pause, Pause, Pause…

NNNNNNNNNNOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

by WaterlooChazz on Jul 23, 2009 12:02 AM CDT up reply actions  

Did you know that the Miami Dolphins have never beaten the Iowa Hawkeyes???

DO YOU HAVE PRIDE, DANNY?

by ReadingRambler on Jul 21, 2009 1:31 PM CDT reply actions  

2 words Iowa Hawkeye Pride...

3 words Hawkeye Pride

I'm a limousine ridin', jet flyin', kiss stealin', wheelin' dealin' son of a gun. WOOOO

by 2mannings1cup on Jul 21, 2009 1:40 PM CDT reply actions  

2002 game: not as close as the score

Remember that the game ended with a Mr. Banks kneeling at the 7 yard line after a will imposing drive. We were in control most of that game. They fought hard, but I don’t ever remember thinking (in the second half), wow — we could lose this thing.’

The ISU game? I’m not sure what you’re speaking of, sir. My therapist assures me that nothing fitting that description ever occurred. The 2002 Michigan game? I was there, and will ASSURE you the game occurred exactly as described. I go to that game when I enter “interrogation” sessions with Iranian prison guards.

by indyhawk on Jul 21, 2009 7:40 PM CDT reply actions  

Hmm. I may have to pull up a box score if I can find one.

My recollection is that Iowa trailed at one point in the 4th quarter and that game was a bit of a nailbiter in the 2nd half. I could be remembering incorrectly though.

I don’t remember Iowa playing ISU in 2002 either. So on that count we’re on the same page.

by DonnyDonovan on Jul 22, 2009 2:38 PM CDT up reply actions  

Iowa against Miami OH,

I think Indyhawk’s comment may apply to the 2003 game at Kinnick (Iowa won, 21-3). I think Donny’s comment applies to the 2002 game at Miami (Iowa won, 29-24).

http://www.jhowell.net/cf/scores/Iowa.htm

by WaterlooChazz on Jul 22, 2009 3:40 PM CDT up reply actions  

All this Big Ben Character Assassination

I think it just proves that we Miami (OHhhh yeah) boys know how to put it down

Is this the wrong time for those jokes?

The Rivalry, Esq.
Big Ten Football: 3 Yards and a Cloud of Field Turf

by Graham Filler on Jul 21, 2009 9:24 PM CDT reply actions  

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