Also He Runs As Fast As A Pneumatic Press
by Oops Pow Surprise on Jul 1, 2009 5:36 PM CDT
in Football
35 comments
Searching for info on Iowa recruiting prospects, we found one player, one Isaiah Lewis, who does things rather unconventionally, apparently:
This, of course, is precisely where our readership is tasked with coming up with a similar metaphor. We must warn you, though; the more you think about "sneaks up on you like a freight train," the more you realize what a daunting task is in front of you. Best of luck. Winner gets an autographed picture of HFMR's balls.
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Isaiah
makes his points subtlety like a sledgehammer.
by Bama Hawkeye on Jul 1, 2009 5:41 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Lewis' stock is flying high like Air France Flight 447
by Twin Cities Hawk on Jul 1, 2009 6:20 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
This dude wins
Like, by a lot. I’m not even going to try.
by NorseHawk on Jul 1, 2009 9:53 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Pube check >> Autographed 'sack photo.
--
Order your copy of "We Are Penn State", like, now. One team, 128 pages.
by Run Up The Score on Jul 1, 2009 6:52 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
IndianaVarsityScout.com:
- Where the metaphors are more finely crated than I have some magnets on my refigerator and tomorrow after work I think I might get a haircut which reminds me, we’re almost out of catfood.
by Bucketochicken on Jul 1, 2009 7:00 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Isaiah Lewis...
scores points like the Gophers, comes through in the clutch like Penn State, and lives up to the billing like South Carolina.
"I'm not doing any good back here."
by Hawkaloogie on Jul 1, 2009 7:26 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
South Carolina was billed as anything more than “Crap”?
DO YOU HAVE PRIDE, DANNY?
by ReadingRambler on Jul 1, 2009 8:14 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
He's calm like a bomb
Had to go the RATM route.
by shada's revenge on Jul 1, 2009 7:52 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Isaiah Lewis quietly approaches like a Billy Mays infomercial.
DO YOU HAVE PRIDE, DANNY?
by ReadingRambler on Jul 1, 2009 8:10 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He has great field vision, like a sewing machine.
He’s nimble, like paint.
His football knowledge is unaparalleled – he’s like a young Imelda Marcos.
He hits so hard his teammates call him “the haberdasher.”
A great nose for the ball – he’s like that Steve Martin movie. You know, All of Me.
He has quick hips like Stephen Hawking.
by Bucketochicken on Jul 1, 2009 8:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I like this amount of effort
Would you prefer the photo of the sack just dangling au naturale or something a little more artsy……like laying it on a bed of daffodils?
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Jul 1, 2009 11:04 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Is "getting run over by a car instead" also an option?
Nothing against daffodils, mind you…
by Bucketochicken on Jul 2, 2009 8:28 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I mean ME getting run over by a car instead, not necessarily your nuts.
Although that would also be a funny picture.
by Bucketochicken on Jul 2, 2009 8:29 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
He’s refined like Marge Gunderson.
DO YOU HAVE PRIDE, DANNY?
by ReadingRambler on Jul 1, 2009 8:36 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
As cool and steely as Lee Corso
Champion of the sun, master of karate and friendship for everyone.
by psu on Jul 1, 2009 9:03 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He has the rock-solid emotional strength of Dick Vermiel.
He can focus his tackles like Billy Joel driving at high speeds.
He plans to be in the program for a long time, just like Nick Saban.
He can play stifling man coverage like that guy who let Crabtree into the end zone (Curtis Brown of Texas?)
He brings the hard-hitting intensity you usually only find in a Richard Simmons workout video.
by WaterlooChazz on Jul 2, 2009 1:38 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He’s loyal like Cael Sanderson and Gene Chizik
by HeartOfHawkness on Jul 2, 2009 6:35 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
This is compelling like the Special Olympics or a Minnesota football game
by HeartOfHawkness on Jul 2, 2009 6:42 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He’s faster than the digital tv transition.
His coverage is tighter than Paris Hilton’s cha-cha.
by storminspank on Jul 2, 2009 8:28 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He’s as humble as Ric Flair.
DO YOU HAVE PRIDE, DANNY?
by ReadingRambler on Jul 2, 2009 9:28 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
WOOOOO
storminspank: "Or we could join you can take our pants off."
by Hawkeye State on Jul 2, 2009 11:33 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Clean as an XXX theater floor
Iowa Basketball: We don't rebuild, we implode.
by three and out the kok story on Jul 2, 2009 12:40 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
innocent as cardinal law
Iowa Basketball: We don't rebuild, we implode.
by three and out the kok story on Jul 2, 2009 12:42 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
And a pall was cast over the Catholic readership of BHGP
Now we’re never getting invited to the Vatican. :-(
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Jul 2, 2009 12:43 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
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