Kyle Calloway Arrested for OWI...On a Moped

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A screencap of the police arrest video

When I was in middle school, we took a field trip to the county courthouse for a civics class.  My class watched a civil lawsuit where two extremely large women were suing another driver for allegedly making them crash their moped.  The lawyer for the other driver quickly pointed out that the two women were more than 100 pounds over the 250 lb. listed weight limit for the moped.  The women got nothing.

Well, fat people on mopeds are about to get another day in court.  From the Chicago Tribune:

Police say Iowa offensive lineman Kyle Calloway was arrested early Saturday morning and charged with operating a vehicle while intoxicated.

Calloway was arrested after officers stopped him while driving a moped into a barricaded area.

Police say Calloway was given a field sobriety and a breathalyzer test, which registered 0.106. The legal limit in Iowa is 0.08.

Iowa City Police Sgt. Mike Lord says Calloway cooperated with police and acknowledged he drank seven or eight beers.

Generally, OWI is no laughing matter.  But when you're a 300 lb. offensive lineman who picks one up (and ends your string of 25 consecutive starts) by knocking back a six-pack, barely cracking .10, and taking your moped off-roading through a construction zone (EDIT: past police cars responding to an accident, which might be even dumber), it's probably an exception to the rule.  So we're going to laugh and hope Marcus Zusevics is ready to start against UNI and the Clones.

We can only imagine what Calloway's night was like.  He was probably hanging with the diminutive Daniel Murray, just waiting for pizza:

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