You're All A Bunch Of Goddamn Plagiarists

You might recall earlier this weekend when we broke the news of Ron Zook's bizarre late-night text Tweeting. Oh, weird, our bold tag must be on the fritz. That was supposed to just be a regular, unformatted sentence, and then we broke the news was in bold. Crazy, it just happened again. Let's see if we can add another word in there--I think I'll pick my favorite word of them all--and then see what happens: we broke the fucking news.

WEIRD!

Anyway, we're moving on. Adam Rittenberg over at ESPN just released some news about said Twitterage:

Zook sent out two tweets that read, "Please. Come Here" and "Is that all U got," around 3:45 a.m. Central time Saturday. The tweets have since been removed from his page.

Asked about the Twitter situation Tuesday at Big Ten meetings, Zook explained he was trying to send test messages to two of his assistants during the day Friday as they continue to learn the Twitter software. In the process of checking to see if the networking tool was working, the messages went out on his general Twitter page.

Oddly enough, the link in Rittenberg points to EDSBS even though we broke the fucking news. Loyal BHGPists know that our motto is "It's not plagiarism if you link to it," and since Rittenberg didn't do so, we can confidently proclaim:

ESPN PLAGIARIZES EVERYTHING.

Even the comments, most along the line of "Zook was trying to hook something up," "Zook is weird," etc. etc. are straight out of our storylines. Again, nobody gives us credit, which means one thing:

EVERYONE WHO READS ESPN PLAGIARIZES EVERYTHING.

It's true. Don't deny it, you cocks. Buncha goddamn liars, the lot of you.

Anyhoo, one person who actually might not be lying, amazingly enough, is the Zooker:

How they ended up being posted at 3:45 a.m. remains a mystery, but Zook said he was fast asleep at the time and had sent those messages as texts to his assistants during the work day.

Having used the text feature on Twitter many times, I have seen unexplained delays for upwards of hours on numerous occasions, so routinely that I'm a little pissed that it didn't occur to me when we broke the fucking news (there it goes again!).

But come on. The Zook messing up at text messages? If there's one thing the Zooker knows, it's texting. Ron Zook not knowing how to use text messages is like Mark Mangino not knowing how to use cheese. Bulllllshit, Silver Fox. But if you're saying those totally obvious booty call messages went out during normal hours for an adult to be awake... well, we can grant you that.

But for real, we broke the fucking news. Plagiarists.