REMARCHIFORNICATION BRACKET MADNESS ROUND ONE: KEN O'KEEFE VS. THE METRODOME STALL

#1 SEED: KEN O'KEEFE

Gamekok_medium

Tournament bid: Automatic

Pros

Cons

  • Called four straight dropback passes on 1st and goal against jNW with the Hawkeyes down by 5, handing jNW the biggest upset in BXI play this year
  • Got Christensen's arm bitten off by a bear

Statement

Gamekok_thumb_medium Hey guys! It's great to be a part of March Madness on BLACKHEARTS.NET.BLUG or whatever you guys call this place. I could never "pass" on giving my favorite website some love, and I hope I get to "run" all the way to a title! My favorite "offensive line" is, "I don't give a dang!" Sorry for the coarse language. Vote for me and I'll never call another bubble screen again! [He is fucking lying.--ed]

#8 SEED: THE METRODOME STALL WHERE THE TWO IOWA FANS SEXED EACH OTHER UP

 

Toilet_medium

Tournament bid: Sponsor's exemption

Pros

Cons

  • Also facilitated the wholly loathsome behavior of internet-stalking the two participants to the point that their lives were wrecked. No, we're not posting their names or pictures, and Christ no, there's no video. Go jack off somewhere else, you fucking savages.

Statement

Larry_craig_stall_on_left_medium (taps foot) Tap tap tap tap tap. Hey. Y'ever heard of a "glory hole"?

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior users will need to choose a permanent username, along with a new password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

I already have a Vox Media account!

Verify Vox Media account

Please login to your Vox Media account. This account will be linked to your previously existing Eater account.

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior MT authors will need to choose a new username and password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Black Heart Gold Pants

You must be a member of Black Heart Gold Pants to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Black Heart Gold Pants. You should read them.

Join Black Heart Gold Pants

You must be a member of Black Heart Gold Pants to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Black Heart Gold Pants. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9347_tracker