FanPost

Pulp Brewster

[Well, we're definitely bumping this.--OPS]

Scene: A shabby office on the campus of the University of Minnesota. Head Football Coach Tim Brewster  is cornered on a chair, having a "discussion".

Iconcornshoes_medium I'm sorry, did I break your concentration? I didn't mean to do that. Please, continue, you were saying something about the Kansas job. What's the matter? Oh, you were finished! Well, allow me to retort. What does Joel Maturi look like?

Brewsterpowericon_medium What?

Iconcornshoes_medium What country are you from?

Brewsterpowericon_medium What?

Iconcornshoes_medium What ain't no country I've ever heard of. Do they speak English in What?

Brewsterpowericon_medium What?

Iconcornshoes_medium English mother fucker! Do you speak it?

Brewsterpowericon_medium GO FIGHT TRY WIN BEST

Iconcornshoes_medium Describe what Joel Maturi looks like. And say 'what' again. I dare you. I double dare you mother fucker! Say 'what' one more Goddamn time!

Brewsterpowericon_medium He's old.

Iconcornshoes_medium Go on.

Brewsterpowericon_medium He's white.

Iconcornshoes_medium Does he look like a bitch?

Brewsterpowericon_medium What?

Iconcannon_medium BOOM

(Brewster's lower left leg goes flying off at the knee)

Brewsterpowericon_medium GO FIGHT TRY PAIN

Iconcornshoes_medium DOES HE LOOK LIKE A BITCH?

Brewsterpowericon_medium NO!

Iconcornshoes_medium Then why are you trying to fuck him like a bitch, Tim?

Brewsterpowericon_medium I didn't!

Iconcornshoes_medium Yes you did! Yes you did, Tim. And Joel Maturi don't like to be fucked by nobody but Mrs. Maturi.

Brewsterpowericon_medium GO FIGHT TRY STAY AT MINNESOTA 

Iconcornshoes_medium That's what I thought.

Unless otherwise expressly indicated by BHGP editors, this FanPost is strictly the viewpoint of the author and is not endorsed by BHGP in any way.

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