IOWA LOSES TO INDIANA, REMAINS UNDEFEATED
IOWA LOSES TO INDIANA, REMAINS UNDEFEATED
9-0 HAWKEYES SUFFER DEVASTATING WIN AT HANDS OF HOOSIERS
Untimely mistakes finally brought the Hawkeyes down to earth as they fell short to Indiana, outscoring the visitors by only eighteen points. Adding to the Hawks' collective misery was the poor career-yardage day of erratic quarterback Ricky Stanzi, whose five interceptions led to Indiana points in bunches. All told, the Hoosiers wrested 24 of them from the previously-adequate Hawk defense, most by any visiting team this year whose colors are crimson and cream.
Iowa could only muster 42 of their own, some of which were delivered lightning-bolt style from Zeus into the steady though lucky arms of safety Tyler Sash, who rumbled with the God-delivered pigskin 88 yards for one of the most thrilling if not deus-ex-machina-like touchdowns in recent Kinnick or anyplace-else memory. Such is the luck of the Hawks when the sun shines upon them. Would this be the breakout victory the pollsters have been waiting for?
Alas, the valiant boys in black and yellow would disappoint again, as they had in their close losses to UNI, Arkansas State and Michigan State.
Despite the questionable abilities and calls of the officials, whose salaries one almost expects to find on the Iowa State Payroll list published annually by the Iowa City Press Citizen, for so great was their pro-Iowa bias, the Hawks did not outplay the Hoosiers convincingly enough to silence their doubters. Time and again, they were caught short. A slick 92 yard pass from Stanzi to receiver Marvin McNutt was simply a matter of "Too little too late," while a garbage-time TD run by Dakota Dunes frosh sensation Brandon Wegher seemed more in the vein of "Well, what have you done for me lately?" Derrell Johnson-Koulianos got into the act with a fifty-plus yard pass reception for a touchdown, yet one could only ask one's self as DJK danced program-like into the end zone, "Is that all this team is going to show us today?" In a word, the Hawk players could not overcome an innate "Midwesterness" that was all-too-obvious to the educated observer, a certain inherent lack of talent and speed afoot, and deliver the goods.
Despite falling to 9-0, some feel the Hawks remain deserving of a Top 25 ranking, possibly a spot in the Top 15 if a convincingly not-lucky victory at The Shoe is in the cards in two weeks. Bowl talk is also starting to flow. Few teams travel like the Hawks, and fluorescently-jacketed scouts from Detroit to Orlando are salivating to get this team's fans into their seats. If Dame Fortune continues to favor the Hawks, a BCS bowl remains a remote possiblity, though admittedly few nationwide are clamoring for the inevitable fifty-point beatdown an undeserving Iowa would certainly suffer at the hands of a speedier and more talented SEC, PAC 10, or Big XII squad.
Prediction for next week: Iowa loses a close one to the Cats as the Hawks manage only 31 points to the Wildcats 14. Detroit, here we come!
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14 comments
Comments
Wait... falls to 9-0?
Oh I get it. Sarcasm, right? Very sneaky my friend.
by shada's revenge on Nov 2, 2009 9:57 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
I agree..
with my Northern California friend. We are fucked. Righteously fucked. Completely and totally fucked. Might as well get the Hawks sweatshirt dry cleaned and back into storage fucked. After its over with Just Northwestern University we are going to be Just Fucked, or J-Fucked for short. Yeah, that’s it, we’re jFucked. Damn, and I was so enjoying this crazy ride.
by Zulu on Nov 3, 2009 9:12 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If we lose anyother close one...
it will be bedtime for bonzo (permanently)… We’re proper fucked.
KOK, you might be a genius...
by hawkeye_heartattack on Nov 3, 2009 6:55 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
I see what you did there.
"I'm not doing any good back here."
by Hawkaloogie on Nov 3, 2009 10:04 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
Sweet Onion!
I guess it would be better with lots of profanity and all, but not by much.
Fitting, that BHGP is now the most literary of football blogs. Would that John Irving were still a grad student, and we’d have a winter of wrestling prose to anticipate.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
by Bellanca on Nov 4, 2009 7:52 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
Bravo!
Great post!
…give me the courage and the ability to so conduct myself in every situation that my country, my family, and my friends will be proud of me.
-Nile Kinnick
by Hawkeyewith49Jackrabbits on Nov 4, 2009 6:44 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
I finally just caught the headline
Well done. Well done indeed.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 4, 2009 7:43 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Thanks! I'm wondering....
….if maybe I made the headline too subtle for some—and they may not know that there’s a little Onion-esque article awaiting them if they click on it.
Well, better luck next time, huh?
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
by The Director on Nov 5, 2009 10:49 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
No no, it was pitch-perfect.
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 5, 2009 11:44 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If that headline is too subtle,
those for whom it is too subtle need to spend time elsewhere. We are a literary state, and at worst, a literate state.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
by Bellanca on Nov 5, 2009 4:01 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
marvelous.
freakin sweet haha.
BALLS OF STEEL RICKY! BALLS OF STEEL!!!!!!
by HAWKEYESBABY on Nov 5, 2009 5:30 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

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