Ohio State Blogs Are Funny...
by Hawkeye State on Nov 11, 2009 1:20 PM CST
234 comments
Prologue here. Congrats, Jizz: You just made my list of things to do today.
Double Prologue: I don't know why that posted in draft form. Full text now posted.
Ohio State blogs who have yet to write a word about this week's game are just now getting around to attacking BHGP for writing more about statistics than uniforms, in the thoroughly unfunny manner we have come to expect.
For a moment, let's feel sorry for Ohio State fans. Just three years ago they were undefeated and playing for a national title. In one game, their nightmares became reality. And then they started having recurring nightmares that happened over and over and over again. They spent an entire summer begging a glorified wideout to come play quarterback for their team and were like OMG GO AHEAD AND BORROW THE REDNECK ROCKER'S BITCHING VETTE FOR UR PROM and he was like OK GR8 I'M COMING TO YOUR SCHOOL FOR THE FOOTBALL AND THE LEARNING. It wasn't until after they got him that they found out he has an arm like Johnny Damon and their coach has the creativity of Orrin Hatch. And now they're staring down the best team they've played since the last time they shit the bed against USC. Which shouldn't be confused with the other time they shit the bed against USC.
So let's take a moment to pity them OMG that is over mock mock mock.
Unread Ohio State blog BBC (which stands for Booster's Bitchin' Corvette, but actually gets most of its traffic from aOSU fans who go to libraries, search for "big black cock," and have sex with themselves) just took a dump on their keyboard and clicked the publish button. Needless to say, they're reeeeeeeealy stretching it, like Mo Clarett's butthole in the prison shower:
Sooooo....our offense is "anemic". Yours was worse when you had a healthy QB. You don't have the QB anymore, but let's ignore that and make it look like Iowa will win? So now we know what we're working with in terms of ignorance.
OK, let's take a look at those offensive numbers. Then when you're finishing thinking that Ohio Statewon 8 games thanks solely to their offense, let us know. Then we'll introduce you to our defense.
Sooooo...we don't have a quarterback. You don't have a quarterback. We have a basic understanding of proper usage of periods and question marks. You still don't have a quarterback. So when you're done typing the letter "o" 17 times, let us know. Then we'll also introduce you to our defense, which -- just like Ohio State's -- has been the backbone of our success.
So let's talk defense, Semen (oh, by the way, the guy who writes this crap is named Semen. I'm not even kidding.) Since you didn't bother to actually, you know, read the post or look at the numbers, I'll provide them for you. Iowa and Ohio State have had three common opponents this year: Penn State,Wisconsin, and Indiana. Both have played two of those on the road. The defensive statistics against those opponents:
|
|
OSU |
Iowa |
|
Wisconsin |
||
|
Rush Def |
118 |
87 |
|
Pass Def |
250 |
143 |
|
Total Def |
368 |
230 |
|
Points |
13 |
10 |
|
Indiana |
||
|
Rush Def |
18 |
79 |
|
Pass Def |
210 |
227 |
|
Total Def |
228 |
306 |
|
Points |
14 |
24 |
|
Penn State |
||
|
Rush Def |
76 |
109 |
|
Pass Def |
125 |
198 |
|
Total Def |
201 |
307 |
|
Points |
7 |
10 |
|
TOTALS |
||
|
Rush Def |
212 |
275 |
|
Pass Def |
585 |
568 |
|
Total Def |
797 |
843 |
|
Points |
34 |
44 |
Boy, Semen, you really got us there. Those 15 yards and 3 points per game that separate our defenses are surely the difference. In fact, your defensive advantage is so significant that we're not even going to bother writing about this game. We obviously have no chance against your incredible defense and admittedly pathetic offense. We'll just genuflect to the statue of Katzenmoyer, Hawk, Laurinaitis, or whatever other overrated burnout OSU pilejumper du jour you have on your nightstand and start writing about basketball.
What Semen fails to mention, of course, is that -- despite that steel curtain of a defense -- they managed to lose to Purdue (PURDUE!) because their quarterback can't throw and their offensive line is a mess. Iowa needed its quarterback to get injured for its offense to become a staggering pile of FAIL; Ohio State needed under-the-table booster payments just to elevate its offense to that level.
Ohio State QB Pryor had a mere 125 yards passing last week against Penn State. And if Ohio State thinks he's going to have anywhere near those numbers against Iowa, they are going to be sadly, sadly disappointed. Vandenberg's admittedly awful performance in three quarters against Northwestern still went for more yardage than Pryor did against mighty Illinois, whose defense is worse than Northwestern's in every relevant statistic (total defense, passing defense, pass efficiency), so you can probably forget the lofty goal of being as good as Scott Tolzien.
Richard Terrelle Pryor is more likely to have the day Austen Arnaud had completing passes...to Tyler Sash. And to Tyler Sash again. And to Zombie Brett Greenwood. And then to Zombie Brett Greenwood again. And then to Tyler Motherfucking Sash one more time just so Brett Greenwood has to buy him dinner.
It's on, fuckers.
0 recs |
234 comments
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Yes...we are either a trap game...
or a scrimmage for them. In any case, if we win this game their BCS credibility is shot. Spent. Done. They will have squandered in less than a decade, the greatest reserves of media goodwill in my lifetime. They were Florida, before Florida and if they lose this game I think they will be destroyed by the media—Pryor in particular (unless he has a heroic effort but some other aspect of their play kills them.)
I want to watch just to see thier performance in the 4th quarter if it is close at that time. It might be better than the Penn State game, even if we lose.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 1:49 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Wait,
so using public computers to search for “big black cocks” is a bad thing? I may need to log off in that case.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 11, 2009 1:50 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Pryor would be the #1 pick in any NFL draft
If he were a WR. But because of ego, pride and the sunken cost in obsurd publicity and hype surrounding his recruitment at a position he plays with reckless abandon, he’s staring down the career path of Pat White.
Yeah, you might whip our ass this weekend and you’ll more than likely get a chance to yet again to fucking embarass your program and our conference in a BCS game. Just remember that all this “Big Ten is overrated” bullshit is because you, our conference power, can do jack fucking shit against any other conference power. Thank you.
(oh, and it was only a couple weeks ago your asshole newspaper writers were second-guessing the decision Tressel made in not recruiting Stanzi. If you think Stanzi sucks, you might want to tell your local beat writers to stop playing the “What if?” game.)
by Twin Cities Hawk on Nov 11, 2009 1:51 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Please
While I wholeheartedly agree that we’ve got more to do with the Big Ten being considered overrated than every other team, it isn’t like the rest of you guys are helping matters:
You lost to Western Michigan in 2007.
Penn State got rocked by USC in the Rose Bowl.
Michigan State lost to Central earlier this year.
Michigan lost to Toledo and Appalachian State.
Northwestern lost to Syracuse.
Minnesota lost to North Dakota State, on top of being Minnesota.
Purdue lost to Northern Illinois (and yes, we lost to them anyway, and I freely admit it was pathetic)
Wisconsin got taken to the wire by Cal Poly.
Illinois has regressed from a 9-3 season and is retaining Ron Zook in the wake of this absolute disaster
Indiana is Indiana.
The conference as a whole just sucks donkey nuts. Ohio State is not responsible for this. The Big Ten was overrated long before Ohio State’s series of OOC asskickings; it did not magically become so because we sucked against Florida, LSU and USC.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 4:14 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
No, it's pretty much all your fault.
Your epic post-season bed-shittings magnify all the other teams’ losses to be bigger, more lopsided and LOLBigTenLOL-ish than they otherwise would be.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 4:37 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Yea
Cuz the Hawks beat South Carolina, biotch!
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 4:41 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
YAY! Our first troll of the week!
Your comments are witty.
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 4:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Which is more than Ohio State could say in back to back years under John Cooper and Tressel
I’m not sure what your point is. Other than to gradulate Iowa, of course.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 6:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
It's true
Nobody gives a shit if Minnesota loses to ND State.
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 4:41 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
You don't really think that, do you?
You don’t think preseason top-5 Michigan losing at home to a 1-AA school was as damaging to the conference’s image as us getting rolled by Florida? Let’s at least attempt to be objective here.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 4:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Don't forget
The B10 numero uno team losing to Dan Persia and the vaunted Wildcat offense. At home! With the NW backup qb! At home! Dan Persia!
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 4:49 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
See, there ya go little guy.
Please accept my extensive apologies for not being witty enough about my comments and my analysis if Iowa football and the B10. I seem to have made the mistake of thinking the members of a blog ‘o’ site that prides itself on levity would enjoy a good spirited round of “talking of the shit” if you will. So that being said, we’re gonna cornhole you barefoot, hay suckin’, Chuck Long lovin’, middle a nowhere, Orville Redenbacher’s!
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 4:59 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Don't forget
that this is Big Ten football and each week has no bearing on the next. The less you think of us, the better chance we have.
by rinseandrepeat on Nov 11, 2009 4:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Actually, it doesn't matter what we think of you
It matters what the team thinks of you. My guess is they won’t overlook any 9-win team that only lost because its leader was injured.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:49 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Yes they will
your team is one big serial self-aggrandizer. That is why the entire football world loves beating the peppercorns out of you. The only team that is more rewarding to beat is USC…a feat, we have come to accept, as you have ZERO chance of accomplishing in all of our lifetimes.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 5:55 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Curious: what's with the hate in particular for USC?
I mean, at least you only got stomped by them once. Imagine how we must feel. And I still don’t hate the Trojans.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 6:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Palmer STOLE Brad Banks' Heisman
(by being better. Also, Larry Johnson should have won anyway. BUT RAAAAGE MOTHERFUCKER)
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:57 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
Naw, Banks was more deserving
Altho, of course, PSU fans don’t give a shit about that anymore because Larry Johnson is now one of the biggest douchebags known to man.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I disagree on the first part but not the second.
BSD
by Kevin HD on Nov 11, 2009 7:05 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Maybe Banks was more deserving
but you have to remember that Carson Palmer was also USC"s QB in 2001, and they lost in the Las Vegas bowl. He also delivered a nationally televised beatdown against Notre Dame the week after Iowa’s season had ended. That game won him the Heisman.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 7:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I meant Banks was more deserving than Johnson
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:24 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Rec'd for pointless righteous indignation
The best kind
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 7:25 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't really hate USC.
I tend to want them to lose, but that’s just more of a rooting-for-the-underdog thing than any sort of loathing for Carrol or whatever. They’re (usually) a lot of fun to watch, I’ll give ‘em that. And PC seems like he’d be a blast to play for, it’s a good school, yadda yadda…
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:12 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
You've never lived in SoCal then
they are imminently hateable as a school.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 7:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Very true, and very believable -
I never really hated Illinois or Notre Dame until I moved to Chicago, either.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I've lived in Illinois my whole life
and I fucking HATE the Illini. Their fans are the most awful bandwagon jumpers in all of college athletics. For YEARS all I heard was, “I don’t care if Iowa is good at football, they suck at basketball” then a few years later it was “YEAH, the football team is awesome and I’m going to watch all of their games now” Now they suck again and it’s back to basketball. But in reality Iowa has just as many national championships in basketball as Illinois does, so I don’t know what they are so fucking smug about.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I live right in fucking yuppie-ass Lakeview, about a block from this Illini bar
called The Schoolyard. Decent bar and all (except for most of the clientelle), but anyway for about the first half of the FB season this year they had a promo banner hanging out front advertising some lame drink special or whatever during Illini FB games, and the tag on the banner was “We’re going to be good again!”
I kept meaning to take a pic and post it here, but I’m pretty lazy about that kind of shit, and we don’t even play them. Anyway, I got a good chuckle every time I walked past. It was so… earnest.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:25 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I live in Rock Island, Davenport East,
So we have lots of Iowa fans on the Illinois side, but the Illini douches are plentiful.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:31 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Hell yeah
50 cent drafts on Thursday nights
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:36 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Lol
I love it. I grew up in Rock Island, went to Iowa and then moved to Lakeview in Chicago so i’ve been to both bars. The beer in the QC is much cheaper.
And you can take that to the bank.
by Hawkeye X on Nov 11, 2009 7:50 PM CST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
I wanted to go to Iowa but the out of state was waaay too much for me
so I went to Western Illinois, got my tuition paid for from a teaching scholarship, and I still went to more Iowa football games than I did Western games.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I may be one of those Illini douches
but having been born and raised in the QC, I feel it necessary to remind you how much better the food is in the Quad Cities compared to every where else. I mean come on Harris Pizza and Jims Ribs
by Joe Kutsunis on Nov 11, 2009 11:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I can't say I hate all Illini fans -
I mean, that would include all my inlaws, after all. It’s largely just, you know, sportshate.
btw, I enjoy HttO. Extra banana stickers for you, Toki.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 12, 2009 1:21 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Considering it was your teams epic
pants-shitting against Florida the year prior that got that ball rolling, yeah a strong argument could be made for that to be the case. In case you’re forgetting how Ohio State and Michigan finished out that year, Michigan ended up beating Florida, while TOUS ended up getting….wait for it….their asses handed to them in the NC game again.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 5:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And remember how Michigan closed that year out?
By losing to USC in the Rose Bowl, another hallowed Big Ten tradition that Ohio State has yet to participate in this decade?
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Wrong again, dipshit
Michigan beat Florida in Cap1 bowl the year they lost to Appy St, which is the year you referenced in the post that I replied to. TOUS got their asses handed to them by LSU.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 5:35 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
"That year" being 2006.
My mistake. What’s with the name-calling?
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:38 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm well aware that Michigan
got smoked against USC is 2006. I’m also aware that they weren’t the heavy favorite like OSU was going into their game against Florida. Your boys went into the game the same way Miami went into the NC game against OSU in 2002. Michigan was supposed to get beat, while the Buckeyes were supposed to roll over Chris Leak and the Gators.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 5:42 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
It's a stretch to say Michigan was "supposed" to get beat
Considering USC had lost to miserable UCLA while Michigan had just barely lost to the seemingly-invincible Buckeyes by three. I seem to recall Michigan was actually favored slightly.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:46 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
To clarify
I was referring to the ’06 Rose Bowl, in which Michigan got destroyed by USC 32-18, as part of the problem, which predated the Florida beatdown.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:41 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Agreed...
…because no one in the national media pays attention to anyone but OSU and Michigan anyway (even when one of the 9 remaining teams is undefeated).
by Eyeheartfreedumb on Nov 12, 2009 12:02 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And an addendum
This is just personal opinion, but I don’t blame the rest of the country for hating on the Big Ten after our big game faceplants.
Is it really all that controversial to suggest that the Big Ten champion – whether it be Penn State or Ohio State – would have gotten demolished by either Florida or Oklahoma in 2008? Is it really all that controversial to say the same about whoever wins the conference this year, only replacing Florida/Okie with Florida, Bammer or Texas?
Perhaps this year, the offenses of those teams aren’t quite as elite as those of the title game participants last year, but I think the point still basically stands: I wouldn’t put faith in any Big Ten team to score more than 10 points against any of those defenses.
Perhaps I’m more down on the conference than others; I realize this is all opinion and conjecture, but I think you’re being a tad too rosy about the overall state of the conference.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 4:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Sam seriously.
You just spent the last 10 minutes of your life trying to talk sense into fucking corn farmers! Here’s to beating Iowa with a glorified wideout at QB! Good luck bitches!
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 4:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Idiot.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 4:31 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
How dare you sir
I will have you know that we also have extensive experience farming beans.
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 4:38 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
And meth producing!
Don’t forget the meth! Andre Agassi sure hasn’t
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 11, 2009 4:44 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Well, yes, but one does not farm meth
It’s chemistry. Really, we should be lauded for our contributions to science.
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:35 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Meth or Norman Borlaug
It’s a toss-up, really.
by Brock Sampson on Nov 11, 2009 6:45 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't see how
Can’t get high on wheat.
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
We also have lots of hogs
So we are probably a bunch of pig fuckers too.
It's not that I'm lazy, Bob, it's just that I don't care
by Colteyes on Nov 11, 2009 7:05 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Nothin' like trippin' balls
while eatin’ your sandwich made from “organic whole wheat”
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm eating organic whole wheat pretzels right now.
Filled w/organic peanut butter. Pretty good.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Goddam hippe.
Black and Gold Blood: Cubbie Blue Heart
by MissouriHawk on Nov 12, 2009 11:03 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Can't get high on wheat YET
I’m sure some enterprising meth-head is working on this problem as we speak.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 12, 2009 10:23 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Yes, you have to rotate the crops
The beans add nitrogen to the soil.
Brunettes not fighter jets
by rockyh on Nov 12, 2009 7:00 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Nobody farms in Ohio?
I guess not, most people don’t even have jobs!
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 4:39 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I WORKED CONSTRUCTION IN TOLEDO FOR A SUMMER. THEY DO A LOT OF BOWLING.
by Zulu on Nov 11, 2009 5:35 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I've driven all the way across Ohio, many times...
…..and there IS no Ohio—there’s only Western Pennsylvania which is green and foresty and hilly, and there’s Eastern Indiana which is, well, IOWA.
Please, Buckeye fans, do not try to tell me that Iowa City is in the middle of nowhere. Columbus is in the middle of nowhere. Ohio is in the middle of nowhere, when it’s not rubbing shoulders with a handful of dirty lakes. You’re not going to win any geographical arguments.
Hawaii it ain’t. Next issue.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
by The Director on Nov 11, 2009 5:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Don't forget southern Ohio
or as I like to call it…Mississippi. They still have “us” and “them” washrooms down there.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 5:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I've met people from southern Ohio
and they’re southern accents are thicker than my finace’s family from Georgia. Of course the future in-laws all have high school diplomas too…
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 6:12 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Southern Ohio
was a David Duke stronghold when he had his cup of coffee in national politics.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 6:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Also where the famous Brandenburg v. Ohio Supreme Court case originated. Guess what that was about… wait for it…… cross burning!
I check cheddar like a food inspector
by SpanishJohnny on Nov 11, 2009 6:41 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Which, ironically, he took black.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He didn't want to send the wrong message with the "mixing" of the cream.
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 8:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He should’ve just skipped the coffee altogether and drank a cup of straight C.R.E.A.M. That’s what I do.
I check cheddar like a food inspector
by SpanishJohnny on Nov 11, 2009 10:31 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I have to sheepishly admit...
that even though I hate USC I hate OSU even more and when USC throttled them it felt good to me. I agree that the reason the MSM is so down on the Big Ten is because, OSU (I REFUSE to include the “t”) the Big Dog in the Big Ten ALWAYS takes a Big Dump on the Big Stage.
by Zulu on Nov 11, 2009 2:01 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
OSU fans
are exactly where we want them. We can only hope that their football team thinks as lowly of our team as that wonderfully gifted blogger… I mean, assuming that they’ve evolved enough to actually think.
by rinseandrepeat on Nov 11, 2009 2:07 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
I hate them so much
I want to see the entire stadium crying like this on Saturday:
by HawkeyeRecon on Nov 11, 2009 2:25 PM CST reply actions 2 recs
I'm sorry but buckeye seeds look like fucking anal beads
And/or pieces of shit.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 4:25 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
God that is fucking HILARIOUS!
This is the funniest fucking blog on the web. Period.
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 4:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
hilarious post.
Period
NaptownHawk
by NaptownHawk on Nov 12, 2009 11:11 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
"Black Heart Brown Underpants"
lol pwnt.
"Do not cheat your team or your teammates. Know your plays. Block. Protect. Add to what we are trying to do."
The Only Colors
by LVS on Nov 11, 2009 2:44 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Black Heart Soiled Pants!
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 3:40 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Holy cow is that guy a douchesickle.
I mean, when your team is a 16-point favorite, how hard is it to write a “you suck, we’re gonna win, ha ha” piece? Just as Stoops wrote a reasonably thought-out, “we’re probably going to lose but here’s some reason for hope” post, an intelligent football writer (read – not Jeff) would probably pen a “we’re probably going to win but here’s some things to be concerned about” type analysis.
And what is the obsession with what day of the week the preview comes down? That guy is a first class assclown.
by DonnyDonovan on Nov 11, 2009 2:51 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
The football stuff = fine, whatever
but the “humor” is all just changing people’s names. Vandenberg = Vanderbeek HUR HURR HURRR FUNNY! I’m sure it’s a big hit with his fellow third-graders, but c’mon…
by Brock Sampson on Nov 11, 2009 5:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm doing my clinicals in a 3rd grade classroom this semester.
They would not find that funny. Even if they knew what a “Vanderbeek” was.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 5:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Of course,
one of them did ask me to spell “cup” backwards and thought that was hilarious, but still…
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 5:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
spell it FORWARDS, I mean.
Fuck.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 5:22 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Take the 5th, pal. You're not helping your cause.
Sometimes, I’m glad there’s no edit function on this site! You get everything, warts and all.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
by The Director on Nov 11, 2009 5:57 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Can we go one week without some dorkhole posting Klingon talk?
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 8:27 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
"Klingon" is not the prefered nomanclature, dude.
Bony headed freaks, please.
Black and Gold Blood: Cubbie Blue Heart
by MissouriHawk on Nov 12, 2009 11:07 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
They are ripe for the taking
Kind of like we were last year after we beat them. Didn’t look like anything was going to stand in our way from winning out. Then Iowa smacked us in the head with a 2×4.
Do the same thing to them you did to us last year.
Mike
Black Shoe Diaries
by BSD on Nov 11, 2009 3:51 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Get over yourself
I seem to recall just about every Buckeye blog listing Pryor in the top five for the Heisman race before the season started. How’s that working out?
And who did you pick to win the Purdue game? Just curious.
Mike
Black Shoe Diaries
by BSD on Nov 11, 2009 8:35 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
Eh, Pryor..
I think we had him in our top 7 or 10 in the preseason race. Obviously way off base, but we weren’t exactly out there alone in thinking that. Things have not worked out, for sure, but he wasn’t voted Big Ten preseason offensive PoY for lacking potential.
As for Purdue, I’m pretty sure astute fans and writers covering top 15 schools would have been calling for the 1-5 team to pull the upset. We’ll work on that.
by eleventy on Nov 11, 2009 9:32 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
bizzurn
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 11:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Better question (sorry, Mike):
Who did you pick to win the OSU-USC game?
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 11:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Thanks for Bringing That Up
We picked USC by five (and caught some heat from our readers for doing so):
http://www.elevenwarriors.com/2009/09/preview-10-ohio-state-vs-3-southern-california.html
by eleventy on Nov 12, 2009 12:03 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh well
Regardless, Pryor, like Morelli, has still not shown a capability to lead his team to victory when the defense is not dominating. Perhaps he will this weeks. Perhaps not.
Anyway, cheers.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 12, 2009 1:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Which is why..
Most of us secretly chuckled when we first heard the expression “arm punt”. He has a long way to go, but Allah-willing, he’ll get there.
by eleventy on Nov 12, 2009 2:44 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
So, to recap:
BSD Mike: Penn State will beat Ohio State.
Eleventy: Your predictions suck!
BSD Mike: You thought Terrelle Pryor was gonna contend for the Heisman.
Eleventy: Everyone was doing it!
Eleventy: Ohio State will beat Purdue.
BSD Mike: Heh heh.
by jimbo2psu on Nov 12, 2009 9:55 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Suck
His “article” reads like an angry 13 year old posting YouTube comments.
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 4:10 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
I’m sensing tOSU players don’t take this team seriously – their fans certainly think Iowa’s a fucking joke. Admittedly, Iowa hasn’t given them reason for concern in pretty much forever. Hey, did you know they grow corn in Iowa? Good one fellas.
I think Mike is right though – tOSU is ripe for the taking. Whether Iowa has enough healthy bodies left to capitalize seems unlikely. However, out of all sense of reason, I think Iowa has a chance IF the Iowa D beats the living shit out of tOSU O line, and they can somehow keep it close. Don’t see the Merit Scholar beating us with his arm.
by txhawkeye on Nov 11, 2009 4:47 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Sure, our team has changed a lot over the season, thanks to injuries… but we’ve done the unlikely all season long. And with an offensive plan made around Vandenberg’s strengths, we’ll have a better chance than Vandenberg trying to make plays made for Stanzi. OSU thinks they have it in the bag, but here’s hoping we take that fucking bag and choke them with it.
by rinseandrepeat on Nov 11, 2009 4:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I agree
The OSU player’s comments on here have been really arrogant.
by Onestatewest on Nov 12, 2009 2:49 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't blame Ohio State SPECIFICALLY for bringing down the national rep of the Big Televen
I do blame the specific douche-nozzle that destroyed Ted Ginn’s Achille’s three minutes into the game, however.
by YouCanPutYourEddsInIt on Nov 11, 2009 5:04 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
That would be Roy Hall.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:06 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Could you tighten the leash on BuckIball, please?
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 5:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Can't you just ban him?
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 5:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I've always believed that if Ginn doesn't get hurt, OSU wins that game.
Kind of like playing the old “What if Germany won WWII?” game.
What ifs, what ifs.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
by The Director on Nov 11, 2009 5:59 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Not sure Ginn could block Derrick Harvey.
www.wewillalwayshavetempe.com
by Sam @ WWAHT on Nov 11, 2009 6:02 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'd expect that from Iowa fans.
But you Pogue?
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 5:26 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, Ohho State fans are so much more sophisticated
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 6:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh I get it..
OuuO
It’s a palindrome!
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 6:15 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
DRAT THAT TARD
PALINDROME FAIL
Before you respond, let me remind you: Brian Cook called me smug, which makes me the Obama of smugness. I'm basically Smugbama.
by Hawkeye State on Nov 12, 2009 8:54 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If you want to
entertain yourself by trash talking, go to a rivals or scout board or something. It’s not the nature of the discourse around here.
by hdhawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:09 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
You can ban me if you want
At least I don’t sugarcoat my comments as to not offend fans of other teams. Your site authors can talk shit,post funny pics, and makeup clever nicknames with the best of them, but I’m supposed to apologize for calling you guys “corn farmers”? I hope BHGP writers keep talking smack, I love that shit, it’s what will be going on down on the field Saturday, so why not here too? If Iowa happens to win then I vow to log right on to BHGP as the clock strikes 0:00, to take my well deserved toungue lashing. Not dissappear for 2 weeks like some people I know(BSD) ahem.
Where’s Hawkzilla?
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 6:33 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
No, really,
disappearing will be just fine, thanks.
by hdhawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:40 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't mind if you want to come over and talk some trash
but you gotta come with something a little more timely and stronger than corn jokes. What’s next, you going to razz us about how Hoover was a bad president?
by Brock Sampson on Nov 11, 2009 6:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Them's fightin' words pal
He was just unlucky!
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 6:55 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
We still have something they never will..
JOHN MOTHERFUCKING WAYNE. Eat shit LOLhio
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 6:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That's the point
All in good fun, but some folks just can’t stand it. BTW, we’ve got 8 president’s pal. No coment on their effectiveness in office.
I’ll give you Nile Kinnick, doesn’t get any better. There.
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 7:04 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Somehow I doubt that
and I’d be willing to bet that you like “Sam” have only decided to grace us with your presence this week..
Thanks for stopping by.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 7:14 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Actually
My first post was a few weeks ago. I like your Iowa footballers. I watch them regularly. What’s the harm in hoping the Buckeyes crush and humiliate you once again, thist time earning a trip to Pasadena and rubbing roses in your face?
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 7:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Other than that it guarantees a Buckeye beatdown?
Nothing I guess. I try to cheer for every Big 10 team during the bowl games, but I don’t shed any tears when TOUS takes their annual dump when the lights shine brightest.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 7:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I mean don't get me wrong
I like watching TOUS get their asses kicked as much as the next guy, but maybe one of these times your boys could nut up and get the job done. Just once.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 8:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
LOL Re: Black Hearts Brown Underpants
I thought all the shit jokes lat week were just 4-year-old leftovers from Paterno having the flu slash being really old — easy layups for a set of bloggers that lacks creativity like Penn State lacks an offensive line — I was wrong, I guess.
I had no idea that it’s actually a regular part of their dialog, and that context has no bearing. [/the more you know music]
BSD
by Kevin HD on Nov 11, 2009 6:08 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
I don't know what to say. I just read the whole thing.
Other than, I do hope these bucknuts represent the outlook of their OSU team. I’m gonna be in row 9, 45 yard line, and I don’t think we’re going to lay down.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
by Bellanca on Nov 11, 2009 6:49 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Could be a problem for somebody.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
by Bellanca on Nov 11, 2009 6:49 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I have a little Iowa educated fun-nugget for *most* OSu Fandom:
Hubris: (n) hyoo-briss – Overbearing pride, presumption or self-confidence. arrogance.
We shall see come game time. We shall see…
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:06 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Almost correct
If you were describing me, then it would be, “hubristic”.
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 7:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Or Douche
ZIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:09 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah I know
I don’t think you’re a douche, I was just kidding, I do enjoy the banter though
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If he was going by your previous posts he would actually be a little above you
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:14 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I see what ya did there
way to suck the fun out of it
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I just knew this post would generate a great thread.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:08 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
speaking of the redneck rocker...
has anyone been able to find his videos on youtube? I think he took them down, which makes me very sad as I was waiting to unleash those on my aOSU coworkers.
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:08 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
maybe his mountain dew endorsement deal came through
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
BuckIball…
Can you please grace us with wittier farming, meth, and dumb Iowan jokes? Please, we love those stereotypes…and also love 3 seconds it takes to refute them when we post things called national ACT scores, the job rate at Principal & Wells Fargo, and well…hey, everyone loves meth.
So will you be at Ohio Stadium for the game? Or could you not use your unemployment check to buy a ticket?
Now excuse me, I have to tend my crops.
by mikjones24 on Nov 11, 2009 7:11 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
back to your turnips, peasant!
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:12 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He's king? Well *I* didn't vote for 'im!
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
does that make this an anarcho-syndicalist commune?
We decide when you hear the snap count...
by thedrizzle on Nov 12, 2009 8:10 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Hey, did you know that Iowa has more pigs than humans?
Just thought that was interesting and quite helpful in evaluating the talent breakdown between the Hawkeyes and the Buckeyes.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:16 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Those numbers are off
In Ames it’s too hard to tell so they have to guess.
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
They just guess pig every time
It's not that I'm lazy, Bob, it's just that I don't care
by Colteyes on Nov 11, 2009 7:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
mmmmmm.....
http://baconhaikus.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/bacon-panties.jpg
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If she REALLY loved bacon
Those words would be stretched out farther.
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 7:22 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Size 400 font?
It's not that I'm lazy, Bob, it's that I just don't care
by Colteyes on Nov 11, 2009 7:23 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Better safe than sorry
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 12, 2009 10:32 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
15 million pigs to be exact
As compared to the three million people we have here.
Did you want me to blow your mind even more and compare our population to the total amount of square miles of corn we have?
Cause…that’s what we do around here. Come up with figures such as this.
by mikjones24 on Nov 11, 2009 7:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Ohio is home to the football Hall of Fame
and the Rock and Roll Hall of fame. And….The Lou Holtz Upper Ohio Valley Hall of Fame.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 7:24 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Iowa gave us John Wayne, Ronald Reagan, and Hayden Fry's 'stache
Ohio gave us Sherman, Grant, and that guy Carl Monday interviewed.
I’d guess that it’s about equal.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:27 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
kudos to you...
for not mentioning ashton kutcher. way to dig a little deeper, we appreciate that.
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:27 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I can't believe Fred Grandy hasn't come up yet
by Brock Sampson on Nov 11, 2009 7:29 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I listen to his morning show on a radio station...
out here in DC. He hasn’t once mentioned the Hawkeyes during his broadcasts this year. I guess he’s permanently changed his address…
THE LLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVEEEEEEE BOAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT!!!
KOK, you might be a genius...
by hawkeye_heartattack on Nov 11, 2009 8:16 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
We all laughed when he was elected
but he looks like Thomas freakin’ Jefferson compared to the wingnut Sioux City has now.
by Brock Sampson on Nov 11, 2009 9:28 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I think
all fans can enjoy Meth jokes. Ohio is no stranger to trailer labs. Let’s not take all the fun out of it.
by Onestatewest on Nov 12, 2009 2:54 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Ulysses Grant, LeBron James, and Jerry Freakin' Springer!
Now what?!
by BuckIball on Nov 11, 2009 7:32 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Chuck Grassley, Kirk Hinrich, and 80% of the guests on the Jerry Springer show
SERVED!
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:33 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Except the fine folks of the Springer show those are not points in our favor!
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 8:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
EXACTLY!
Wait, what? you mean Iowa ISN’T proud of Chuck Grassley or Kirk Hinrich?
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 8:23 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I guess Chuck made that commerical where he pulled two small mowers with a big mower
Cause he’s just an average working-class dude who mows the ol’ lawn. That was pretty funny. And he looks kinda like an alien and says crazy unintentionally funny shit all the time. Upon further review, I’ll give him a pass.
Kirk Hinrich, however, went to Kansas, which is shameful.
by NorseHawk on Nov 11, 2009 8:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Agreed about Hinrich
But I guess I’m a Bulls fan, and Chuck’s best crazy shit was when he said all of the wall street guys who took bonuses should kill themselves hara-kiri style, and he didn’t even blink or smile in the least when he said. Hilarious.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 8:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I sat next to him on a flight from Washington to Chicago a few weeks ago.
The guy flies coach. That’s a true ’Mercan.
"Do not cheat your team or your teammates. Know your plays. Block. Protect. Add to what we are trying to do."
The Only Colors
by LVS on Nov 11, 2009 8:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He's a fake
if you talked to him, you know that.
"I think it's safe to say our concerns are many." -- Kirk Ferentz
by StoopsMyAss on Nov 11, 2009 8:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Sounds like most politicians...
KOK, you might be a genius...
by hawkeye_heartattack on Nov 12, 2009 10:05 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Uhh....
Yeah, thanks for Charles Manson and Dahmer.
Ohio: You da Best!
by mikjones24 on Nov 11, 2009 7:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Grant was overrated. So was Sherman, but not as bad.
Big deal.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:35 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Altho I don't have a horse in this race, I wanted to point that out
Thank you.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:36 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
John Reynolds. Winfield Scott Hancock.
Pennsylvania pwns you all.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:36 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Hancock, no
Sherman was better. Reynolds may have been the best of them all, but we’ll never know as he didn’t get to fulfill his promise.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 12, 2009 10:37 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Outside of McPherson, Hancock was the best tactician in the Union Army after Reynolds died
I will fight you.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 12, 2009 11:46 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
CIVIL WAR NERD FIGHT!!!!!!
I really think Rosencrans gets overlooked too often.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 12, 2009 12:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Eh, he was decent
But something happened to him after he pushed the confederates out of Tennessee. He was a walking disaster at Chickamauga.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 12, 2009 1:36 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Tullahoma was typical of Rosecrans
His movement of forces was excellent, but he was just hesitant enough to allow Bragg to escape.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 12, 2009 1:38 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Kind of like
Hooker at Chancellorsville. Excellent up to the exact moment when the forces made contact.
And I was kidding about Rosencrans, guess I should have been more obvious with my example, like Burnside or Butler.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Nov 12, 2009 3:07 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I guess Rosecrans was better than, say, Oliver Howard
You’re on the flank. And you’re not digging in. Makes sense.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 12, 2009 4:05 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Peanut butter, James Van Allen, my uncle Dan, the oldest college west of the Mississippi,
equal marriage rights, the nation’s largest teaching hospital, that one movie with Donald Sutherland with the aliens or brain slugs or whatever, the Five Sullivan brothers, and my dog Ed.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 7:37 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Sullivan brothers
Good call.
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 11, 2009 7:42 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
let's just leave it at
Fuck you! We’re Iowa!
Keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either, Dude.
by AcrimoniousAngerererer on Nov 11, 2009 7:44 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
My dad is from Cedar Falls
So I’ve known about the Sullivan Brothers’ since I was in grade school and we first learned about WWII. Amazing story.
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 7:59 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Wait...
You knew about that even before Caroline’s Spine made a song about it?
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 9:32 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Wow
+1 for obscure one-hit-wonder memory
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 9:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Johnny Carson, Buffalo Bill Cody, Cloris Leachman, the Glen Miller Band, and Grant Wood
rasberry
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 8:03 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
raspberry bold fail.
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 8:03 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
We also have Dan Gable
and you don’t.
I have occupational turrettes... My job makes me swear uncontrolably at everyone.
by Ioweegin on Nov 11, 2009 8:05 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Oooo, good ones.
Cloris Leachman = awesome.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 8:09 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
TRHS alumna
And dynamite in the sack.
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 8:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
come on! Buffalo Bill Cody, Ann Landers and her sister, Donna Reed, Meredith Wilson, Grant Wood, Tommy Bolin, Gary Cooper, the homoerotic Hobbit, Michelle Monaghan, WP Kinsella. This is too fucking easy.
by txhawkeye on Nov 11, 2009 9:23 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Johnny Carson and Dear Abby
suck it, bitches
by YouCanPutYourEddsInIt on Nov 11, 2009 9:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Lets not forget..
that Captain James T. Kirk will be born in Iowa sometime in the future (Riverside, I believe?)
Any “trekkies” out there wanna verify that?
KOK, you might be a genius...
by hawkeye_heartattack on Nov 11, 2009 8:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm not a trekkie
but that’s correct. I will also be the first to admit that it’s all ready in queue for Netflix to send it to my house.
by TarHeelHawk on Nov 11, 2009 9:04 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
If you've never been to Trek Fest at Riverside, you really need to go.
The best part is that it has nothing to do with Star Trek, but there’s definitely bull-riding and Pabst Blue Ribbon and shit…….
No self-respecting man from Iowa goes anywhere without beer
by Hayden Fry's Moustache Ride on Nov 11, 2009 9:37 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I know he got mentioned earlier, but...
Norman Borlaug, people. He’s like the LeBron of doing something useful.
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 8:29 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Donna Reed, the original blue Power Ranger....
…and fucking Bernie from Weekend at Bernie’s. Look it up.
by Ed Podolak of Good Judgement on Nov 11, 2009 9:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Or the guy who plays him, anyway
You know, Ron…. Somethingorother.
Livingston. Ron Livingston.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 9:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
POWER LANCE
I got more rhymes than Wade Lookingbill's got dunks
by Oops Pow Surprise on Nov 11, 2009 11:32 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Bernie
OVER, this fight has been called, sir.
by Onestatewest on Nov 12, 2009 2:57 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
hmmm
i seem to recall a great film about your kind. Alas, i’ve found it : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35Hg8bIFu-A Can’t wait to bitch slap you bitchass tricks. On Iowa!
i don't wife em...i one night em
by smokinthereiff on Nov 12, 2009 6:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Dude thats cold...
I know people from Xenia.
KOK, you might be a genius...
by hawkeye_heartattack on Nov 12, 2009 9:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
its just a reflection of
the type of people in that shithole state. On Iowa!
i don't wife em...i one night em
by smokinthereiff on Nov 13, 2009 1:29 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
This thread is hilarious
I was feeling kind of bad for instituting a 7 day wait for new users to comment last Saturday. Now, now so much.
Mike
Black Shoe Diaries
by BSD on Nov 11, 2009 8:40 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Since we're on the topic
Of Iowa being a better “place” than Ohio, I thought I would just point out a few fun little facts
Unemployment rate of Iowa – 6.7%
Unemployment rate of Ohio – 10.8%
Median household income of Iowa – $50,465
Median household income of Ohio – $48,960
Average ACT score, Iowa – 22.4
Average ACT score, Ohio – 21.7
So, as a whole, we’re more likely to be employed, we make more money, and appear to be generally smarter. But, ya know, all we actually know how to DO is grow corn (and beans), fuck pigs, and make meth. And ALL of this has precisely what to do with the game on Saturday?
Would this be an appropriate place for the “Fuck you, We’re Iowa” statement?
by benvious on Nov 11, 2009 9:46 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
Because if we win we get to fuck all their pigs, sell all their corn (and beans)
and sell snort smoke take all their meth.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 9:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
What is the correct verb to use to describe using meth, anyway?
Aside from “retarding,” that is.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 11, 2009 10:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That would probably go something like this
“Not everybody’s the perfect person in the world. I mean everyone does meth, murders people on meth, steals from you to buy meth, steals from me and my meth, whatever. I think that people need a second chance, and I’ve always looked up to Mike Vick, and I always will.”
"If Ron Zook were an ice cream flavor, it would be praline and retard"
-Garth Algar
by Tree Meister on Nov 11, 2009 10:09 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Meth out?
Meth up?
Get methed?
Fitzgerald it?
by HawkeyeRecon on Nov 11, 2009 10:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Calling using meth retarding
Is an insult to retards. As someone who was taught to understand that anhydrous ammonia (a commonly used chemical in the meth making process) is quite possibly the most horrific substance known to man, it never ceases to amaze me that these morons inject/smoke/snort something that requires THAT stuff in order to make.
I’m not a big fan of the illegal drug scene, but there are “special” drugs that just take the cake in their level of idiocy. Meth tops that list, by pretty much any measure.
by benvious on Nov 11, 2009 11:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Can't argue with that.
Methmouth photos are enough for me.
by Bucketochicken on Nov 12, 2009 1:22 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Even if you don't have time to kill...
http://www.drugfree.org/Portal/DrugIssue/MethResources/faces/index.html
That’ll do it. Fairly confident Ohio and Iowa are equally represented here.
by Onestatewest on Nov 12, 2009 3:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Jerry The Mother Fucking Beaver Mathers
Bix Beiderbecke , Tommy Bolin, Slipknot, and our friends from Cedar falls the House of Large Sizes.
Plus Ozzy bit the head off the bat in Des Moines.
oh, but don’t worry, Ohio will always have
In 100 years, we'll all be dead.
by Flakbait on Nov 11, 2009 10:08 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Plus Led Zepplin played their first ever American concert at U of I
by Zulu on Nov 12, 2009 12:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Not according to Wiki
(sorry, that was really interesting to me and I was hoping it was true, because that would be awesome) but according to Wiki the first was in Denver, however they did play the Field House during their first American tour
Hey Dolph, you look like I need a beer.
by Give Eddie a Beer on Nov 12, 2009 1:03 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Let me get on that.
I was in ‘Nam at the time but I’ve got several friends were at the gig.
by Zulu on Nov 12, 2009 8:15 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Thanks for your service!
Sam Lickliter. Never forgive. Never forget. Beat IU.
by ReadingRambler on Nov 13, 2009 11:28 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Eddie,
I checked with friends that were there and they agree that Led Zepplin had done a couple of gigs on the west coast (and Denver) before playing at Iowa, they remember the Iowa date as January 15 1969. Led Zepplin played in the Iowa student union and since weather held up the band’s gear they had to borrow gear/instruments from a popular IC band, “Mother Blues”. This was before the LZ’s very first album was out and no one had any idea how big they would become.
by Zulu on Nov 13, 2009 8:57 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Eddie
I feel like I’m violating some sort of BHGP code but, go here…
by Zulu on Nov 13, 2009 10:46 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Thanks, cool piece of Led Zep/UI history
Apparently UI was the first college campus they played, I’ll take that. And the concert flier is cool too. Figures that it would’ve been an ice storm that could have prevented the Zep from playing here.
Hey Dolph, you look like I need a beer.
by Give Eddie a Beer on Nov 13, 2009 11:21 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Sorry
I enjoy good trash talking as much as anyone else, but that’s pretty classless.
by eleventy on Nov 12, 2009 3:55 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
It was only because
Marshall is just barely across the border in WV.
by Ed Podolak of Good Judgement on Nov 12, 2009 6:04 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Didn't the Ozzy deal happen at Hilton in Ames?
Maybe I’m misremembering my facts.
It's not that I'm lazy, Bob, it's that I just don't care
by Colteyes on Nov 12, 2009 6:33 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Has T-Boz from TLC been mentioned?
I check cheddar like a food inspector
by SpanishJohnny on Nov 11, 2009 10:37 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
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