I have some gross but interesting information for all of you. The Thursday before the Michigan game, I took a shit and the turds floating there were in the shape of a V for victory. I thought, was this a sign that this toilet was predicting a Victory for the Hawks? Surely it was random? I was going to take a picture of it and send it to my friend but thought it was too far fetched.

Fast forward to today. I went and shit again only to find… another V! It can’t be random. This toilet somehow has a way of predicting the outcome of the games. The porcelain god has picked another victory for the hawks.

Now let’s go shit all over MSU.

“…will literally shit on your cheerleaders.”