Cyrus Tate Sprained His Ankle Then...

by studbucket on Jan 9, 2009 11:00 AM CST Comment 19 comments

He shrieked.

He shrieked like I never thought a 6'8" monster could. He was lying on the floor 10-15 feet from me underneath our basket, slowly rolling around in pain, keeping his right leg slightly bent and stationary.

10 seconds later Matt Gatens is standing over him trying to heal him with his mind bullets (that's telekinesis Kyle) and the trainors are touching his legs while he whispers about his pain to them.

Then it happened. A trainer reached down, touched his ankle, and while the gym was completely quiet, Cyrus let out a shriek/scream hybrid. It was like a 1-second long falsetto orgasmic noise.

This is the kind of thing I think everyone needs to know.

[Well, we can't not bump this.--OPS]

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It was horribly audible on the teevee too.

Gottlieb or whichever jackball glibly noted that “that’s not good.”

by Bucketochicken on Jan 9, 2009 11:29 AM CST reply actions 0 recs

I don't know if anyone saw

But the trainer was copping a feel on Tate as he got up. I’m no doctor, but I don’t think slipping two in is gonna help a sprain.

And when the machine breaks down, we break down.

by victorypolka on Jan 9, 2009 11:32 AM CST reply actions 0 recs

I definitely saw...

From behind, it looked like he was trying to give him the shocker.

by studbucket on Jan 9, 2009 11:34 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs

Were any yacks harmed

while Mr. Gatens was trying to heal him?

by psuphiman80 on Jan 9, 2009 11:58 AM CST reply actions 1 recs

The CHA Sherpas moved all yaks to the top/concourse area prior to tipoff.

So they’re all ok.

by Bucketochicken on Jan 9, 2009 12:01 PM CST reply actions 1 recs

Bucketofchicken is right...

it was very audbile on the TV. It was quickly followed by this gem from Gottlieb:

“That isn’t good”

Thanks, Doug.

by TarHeelHawk on Jan 9, 2009 12:49 PM CST reply actions 1 recs

Was It as Surprising on TV?

I seriously was taken aback, and I think a lot of people chuckled to themselves, but not loudly. Cyrus was making it seem like he broke his coccyx or something.

by studbucket on Jan 9, 2009 1:06 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

Not surprising, really, but I definitely winced...

…And then likely made some sort of asshole-ish comment in the gamethread.

by Bucketochicken on Jan 9, 2009 1:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

The ESPN cameras never bothered to get back to Tate until

after Minnesota’s possesion was over. He was able to put weight on it when he walked off the floor, so maybe thats a good thing. Cole better get his shit together.

by TarHeelHawk on Jan 9, 2009 2:07 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

Cyrus Tate...

only power forward in Iowa history to make use of the Wilhelm Scream.

by Angle's Dangle on Jan 9, 2009 1:45 PM CST reply actions 2 recs

Well at least the team didn't totally fall apart without him or something

by NorseHawk on Jan 9, 2009 2:01 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

Andrew Brommer

Is almost as sexy as Seth Gorney. I miss the Gornstar. He’s probably bangin all sorts of ladies wherever he is. Where is he? Maybe I am him. Or maybe not.

by Life as a G on Jan 9, 2009 2:41 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

Just wondering

I’m no bball expert, but when Lickliter gets this turned around (and I think he will) and his team has risen to the top 3rd of the big xi, are they still going to be painful to watch? It’s brutal, fugly basketball and if this is what I’m in for I’d just like to know so I can medicate myself whenever they’re on.

by txhawkeye on Jan 9, 2009 2:54 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

No. I think it will be beautiful.

Like our OL’s zone blocking scheme – when it’s not working, it’s pug-fugly, but when they’re on, it’s a thing of incredible beauty and precision. Think Butler (discipline, fundamentals, team effort, veins filled with ice water), but with the budget and resources of a B10 program. I think the future is extemely bright.
It’s gonna take awhile though – Lick has a much bigger rebuilding project on his hands than KF did. We’re just gonna have to be patient in the meantime. But the payoff will come. And when it does, it will be spectacular (just like it was with KF).

by Bucketochicken on Jan 9, 2009 2:59 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs

In My Opinion...

No.

Right now our 10 man rotation consists of 4 freshman, 3 sophomores, 2 juniors, and 1 senior. Matt Gatens is our best all-around player in my opinion, but he still makes boneheaded passes and doesn’t always show up every game.

I think once we get a more mature team, we will see better shots taken, causing more points to be scored, which inherently seems to make the game play at a faster pace.

by studbucket on Jan 9, 2009 3:01 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

I hope your right

Oh do I hope your right after that atrocious 2nd half last night, my gf actually got up and went into a different room because she could tell i was about to throw something.

Fucking gophers.

Its a funny story actually.

by Wad on Jan 9, 2009 3:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

I turned over to football for what must have been 20 minutes, and when I flipped back I think 2 points had been scored in 7 minutes of game time. And Tubby Smith looks like he’s aged 20 years in the past 2. Univ of Minnesota must do that to coaches.

by txhawkeye on Jan 9, 2009 3:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

Imagine how old Lick's gonna look...

Todd Lickliter, c. 2011

by Bucketochicken on Jan 9, 2009 3:36 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs

Yeah, it's hard to watch.

The stretch between roughly 16 minutes left in the 2nd half and 5 minutes was the most putrid 11 minutes of offensive basketball I have ever watched (I am using offensive in both senses of the word). I want to believe this thing will turn around, and I am far from abandoning ship 1 1/2 years into a new regime, but that was just brutal, brutal stuff.

by DonnyDonovan on Jan 9, 2009 10:29 PM CST reply actions 0 recs