Holy Lord, the Press-Citizen is Awful

by Adam Jacobi on Sep 23, 2008 4:00 PM CDT in Iowa Hawkeyes Football

The P-C just published an absolute farce of an article about Kirk Ferentz's press conference. A typical cross-section:

So what was going through Kirk Ferentz's mind when he named Ricky Stanzi the starting quarterback for Saturday's homecoming game against Northwestern?

He's not telling.

Of course not; he never does. Coaches never do. Not news. The more important a decision is, the less a coach will talk about it. Well, not until it's proven successful, then he'll be sure to go into all the detail your brain can handle before it dissolves in a smoking mess out of sheer boredom.

Then the article, published without a byline, only "The Press-Citizen," drops a stunner on the millions, if not trillions of Hawkeye fans worldwide [emphasis ours]:

On Stanzi, Ferentz simply said "I think he gives us our best shot this week."

The Hawkeyes will need a good shot against Northwestern, which has beaten Iowa three straight times.

No. they. fucking. haven't. This isn't a typo or an uncaught misstroke of a key, this is a factual error that anyone with even a cursory understanding of very recent Iowa football would be able to catch. Why not say Iowa's coach is Glen Mason, or that the Hawkeyes will be playing the Denver Broncos next week and that the game will be two-hand-touch football? How do you fuck up that badly? Oh yeah...

Just a hunch.

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Comments

Whoa, whoa, wait - we're playing the BRONCOS?????

Jesus H. Cracker-Crumbling Christ!!! Thank god Walter Payton is our QB!! We’d never be able to handle their full-court press otherwise.

by Bucketochicken on Sep 23, 2008 4:16 PM CDT reply actions

I think we stand a decent chance

since we’re playing two hand touch

by chitownhawkeye on Sep 23, 2008 5:58 PM CDT up reply actions

I dunno, it's gonna be tough

Larry Walker can hit the ball a fucking country mile.

by Bucketochicken on Sep 23, 2008 7:46 PM CDT up reply actions

In their defense...

…NW did beat Iowa in 2005 and 2006. If you stopped watching last years game at 14-0 in the first quarter, when Iowa was lining up to punt deep in their own territory, it was a safe assumption that Northwestern would beat Iowa three straight times.

In other words, if you entered a cave at that precise moment, just came out, and had to write an article without the time to look it up, then yeah, that mistake is understandable.

If you are paid to write about sports and cover Iowa sports for a living, then not so much.

by DonnyDonovan on Sep 23, 2008 4:49 PM CDT reply actions