Giving Thanks

[Bumped. HFMR FTMFW.--OPS]

Earlier in the season, I mentioned a bet that I had with my Cyclone-fan cousin.  Well, on Thanksgiving it was time to pay the fiddler.  He had to wear the shirt of my choosing at our family get-together last week. 

I sort of threw it together at the last minute because that's how I do everything, but in the end I feel like it served it's purpose.  Here's what it looked like:

And the back:

I generally don't like lists on t-shirts because the person wearing the shirt has to stand there like a gimp while people take the time to read it, but it ended up working out because

a) i couldn't decide on just one phrase 

b) it's Thanksgiving in Iowa so all we had was time.

c) I wanted him to have to stand there like a gimp

If you can't read the shitty iron-on in the photo, here's what the back said:

Ten reasons why I love the Hawkeyes and hate the Cyclones:

1) Barack Obama and the Iowa Hawkeyes are what makes America great (he votes republican for some reason)

2) As long as there has been football, Iowa State has been sucking at it.

3) Herky might be my biological father (I wasn't allowed to use the original phrase - "Herky fucked my mom")

4) ISU fans are proud to be "the best 3-9 team in the country" every year

5) "Cyclone" is French for "softcock"

6) Mitch King scares the shit out of me

7) Kirk Ferentz could beat Gene Chizik like a red-headed stepchild

8) ISU's quarterback was sick of being on a shitty team, so he quit.

9) Once the Cyclones lose their Super Bowl against Iowa, they have nothing left to play for.

10) Cy is Herky's ambiguously gay cousin

Needless to say, he looked fantastic in it:

Clearly this is what Thanksgiving is all about.  Cyclone bashing and Beast Light.

While I'm at it, here's your ISU LOL true fact of the day:

The attendance record at Jack Trice Stadium was set in 1990.  At a fucking Paul McCartney concert.