There's A Game On Friday? Iowa State And the CLONE ZONE

This never gets old.
For the fourth time this season, Iowa is playing a game on Friday night, which everyone knows is reserved for high school games ("Hawkeyes or City West? Sorry Iowa, gotta root for my Trojans"). But unlike the first three contests, this one may as well be against a high school opponent: the Iowa State Cyclones.
Iowa State sucks so bad. This we know. We've known it for forever. This year is no exception; ISU is 6-2, yes, but against one of the worst schedules in the nation (RPI rating: #315. No, seriously). Beating Iowa State will probably drop Iowa's RPI, as a matter of fact. Stop the rivalry!
Iowa State's best weapon is Craig Brackins, a 6'10" beast who averages 17 points a game. Does Iowa have anyone who can adequately D up on Brackins one on one? Uh... well... Andrew Brommer's probably getting his five fouls.

Brackins encounters minimal resistance from the Invisible All-Stars.
But Brackins is only one man, and decent denial defense will probably keep him somewhat in check. And if he gets 25, fine, I guess, because there isn't another reliable scorer on the squad.
The ISU roster is full of names that are familiar to Iowa fans. Okay, not "full of," per se, but there's three of them. Former Iowa commit turned Canadian non-qualifier (fuckin' Canadians, man) Jamie Vanderbeken is still not very good, but he leads the team in blocks and is a competent 3-point shooter. Watching Cyrus Tate try to guard him 20 feet from the basket might be an adventure, and god help us if Iowa keeps switching on every screen and we see a matchup like, let's say, Vanderbeken on Peterson.
There's also Sean Haluska, who is not nearly as good as his brother, and Iowa transfer Alex Thompson, who still goddamn sucks. They are of no use to Iowa State and thus, we encourage them both to be on the court as much as possible.
For the good guys, Anthony Tucker remains on suspension for doing his best Jack Torrance impression.
That's fine, though, as Tucker's 44.3% rate of success on 3s is only 4th best on the team; sure, David Palmer making it on there at 2 of 3 is kind of (very) cheating, but Jeff Peterson has hit 46.2%, and Matt Gatens has been unconscious from behind the arc to the tune of 20 for 33 on the year, a 60.6% clip. And no, that can't continue all year long. But the freshman record for 3-pointers, set last season by Jake Kelly, is 43.4%. In order for Gatens to drop below that, he'd have to A) miss his next 14 threes, or B) maintaining his shooting frequency through the rest of the year, hit just 27 of his next 76 threes. That works out to 35.5%: yes, it's plausible, but considering Gatens' uncommon, dare we say Tebow-esque propensity to avoid mistakes, it's also improbable.

Yes, I compared him to Tebow. Deal with it.
Past that, you know the usual suspects; Cyrus Tate is a big man in a small-man system, and though he's still converting at an absurd clip (64.4%), he's only scoring 7.4 points a game. That's mainly because the ball rarely gets to him. Iowa struggles mightily with pressure (so thanks for the passive defense, UNI!), and Peterson and Kelly are usually trying to dribble out of trouble instead of finding Tate in the post.
So it comes down to this: if ISU presses Peterson and the other guards and is athletic to overplay the passing lanes, they'll have a shot at this game. But they're not West Virginia or even Kansas State, and they're just not long and explosive enough on the wings to cause too much trouble for Iowa in the backcourt. Barring unreasonable production from the ISU shooters (or unreasonable coldness from Iowa's), this should be a win for Iowa in the neighborhood of 6-10 points.
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So if Gatens is Tebow-like...
Does that mean Lee Corso is going to ball wash Gatens’ family on National TV as well?
by Twin Cities Hawk on Dec 12, 2008 7:53 AM CST reply actions
Me too..
Nosebleeds…South Endzone…err end? Seats shitty enough to rival my football season tickets. Kind of wondering how crazy it is to drive 7 hours on a Friday night for a quick basketball game, but hey…its the Clone Wars so why not? It’s worth it to see the disappointed people in red.
Go Hawks!
I'll be in the nosebleeds, too
Just not sure where. I’m excited — my compatriot is a Cyclone fan, and I can’t wait to drive home and rub it in his face.
by imadirtyoldman on Dec 12, 2008 11:14 AM CST up reply actions
Ah, Sean Haluska
As I think I’ve mentioned here before back when we were both in high school, I spent an entire game heckling The Lesser Haluska about being worse than his brother. Eventually during a timeout he turned around, screamed at me, and got in trouble with his coach, which was high comedy. He also went like 3-20, and we won the game. Obviously, I was team MVP.
In retrospect, I’m an asshole, but it was still good times.
I did that same shit to Charles Oliver
Then I met him at a party, and we almost got into a fight. Simply because of my hometown. Good times.
by imadirtyoldman on Dec 12, 2008 8:57 AM CST up reply actions
Marshalltown
I am from Marshalltown. It is good see another Marshalltownoian on here.
gotta love those maid-rites!
TOUCHDOWN IOWA! TOUCHDOWN IOWA! - Gary Dolphin
Marshalltown: Happy Home of Maid-Rites and Meth!
by jebushchrist on Dec 12, 2008 12:49 PM CST up reply actions
I would say something bad about Marshalltown
But I’m from Newton and it’s even worse, and we’re not even in the CIML anymore…
I know tell everyone that Iowa City is my hometown.
And Home of Illegal Immigrants!
W00T W00T!
by storminspank on Dec 12, 2008 2:54 PM CST up reply actions
haluska
Haluska 2 is about as streaky as my underwear(he can go from ice-cold to morbidly cold in an instant). i have seen more talent at 7th grade C games(fucking coach wouldnt move me up to B, dickweed). anyhew, i got the honor of watching that douchebag play at indian hills, and needless to say, he does not have Iowa Energy potential
by 2mannings1cup on Dec 12, 2008 1:20 PM CST up reply actions
I was the star of my 7th grade C-Team
My fucking coach wouldn’t bump me up to the B-Team, either. And I had Rec-Specs! I mean, WTF??
Never played hoops again.
Suck it, Coach Christensen!
by Bucketochicken on Dec 12, 2008 1:43 PM CST up reply actions
I used to where shoes from KMart
You know, the “non-marking” black marking “athletic” shoes. Made out of 100% plastic and sure to last 3 weeks of the season.
by storminspank on Dec 12, 2008 2:56 PM CST up reply actions
I wore the Wal-Mart brand ones in high school BBall - Voit.
Me and the smelly kid (not the QB) were the only ones not wearing Reeboks or Jordans. To this day, when somebody take s a cheap shot, or something is just plain old cheap, my friends and I call it “Voit.”
by YouCanPutYourEddsInIt on Dec 12, 2008 4:36 PM CST up reply actions
Yeah, my shoes were Avia. Shockingly, no one else had those...
I think they may have been women’s shoes.
Fuck.
by Bucketochicken on Dec 12, 2008 4:47 PM CST up reply actions
Oh hell
I had Avia shoes too. I’m pretty sure they were the reason I never could make it past the B team. Nothing to do with my complete lack of talent.
by chitownhawkeye on Dec 12, 2008 5:45 PM CST up reply actions
THAT'S IT
Fucking VOIT.
Goddammit. We had recess once.
Kids who had NIke and Reeboks vs. everyone else.
My team sucked.
by storminspank on Dec 12, 2008 6:14 PM CST up reply actions
We had recess a bunch of times.
Your school must’ve been really strict.
by Bucketochicken on Dec 13, 2008 12:30 PM CST up reply actions
Great Trades in History
The Adam Haluska for Alex Thompson deal is one of the greatest trades in sports’ history.
I like Lick's approach.
It works for the type of players we will be able to get…a kind of bigger, better version of Drake last year. We can D up, get some threes and the occasional athletic big man will come here and next thing you know…NIT.
"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."
- George Rogers, one-time South Carolina RB
I wish I could come back with something....but....
….meh…. I like Lickliter more than our coach, and I think you guys will win by 12-15.
So….THERE! TAKE THAT!!
Barnes a Thompson clone?...not necessarily literally
Any chance Barnes is the next big time prospect to come outta L’Ames and flame out(remember Alex thompson was a 4-star recruit) like the last big idiot?
Also, over/unders:
Jake Kelley- 20 points
Matt Gatens- T-bags at least 4 cyclown guards
Brommer- 4 fouls
Peterson- 8 assists
Glen Worley- still sucks
Alex Thompson- same amount of points tonight as me (can’t be under, so over/tie)
JR Angle- 130 pounds and completely bald within next week/week and a half
Where ya from Norse?
I am from Carroll and went to CHS, but graduated before both Adam and the younger Haluska. As I mentioned in the other thread, I did go to HS with Lois Feldman though. That’s pretty awesome right there.

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