Great Moments in Minnesota Football History: Losing As Art

by Adam Jacobi on Nov 20, 2008 12:00 PM CST in Iowa Hawkeyes Football

Throughout HATE WEEK, we'll be looking back at some of the memorable moments in Gopher football history. Because all teams have moments of ineptitude, but few have so many widely available on Youtube.

December 29, 2006:

In the history of the NCAA, there have been 832* bowl games played. The odds, then, of achieving any sort of superlative like "most first downs in bowl history" or "highest score in bowl history" are remarkably small.

In the 2006 Insight Bowl, Minnesota looked to be en route to setting a few of those marks of their own, running roughshod over the Texas Tech Red Raiders. The Gophers led 35-7, then tacked on a field goal halfway through the third quarter to push their lead to 31. Certainly everything will go according to plan, yes?

Yes:

Oh ho ho! Certainly you didn't expect the "plan" to be "cruise to an easy win." This is Minnesota and Glen Mason, and if there's one thing they knew how to do better than anyone else ever, it was collapse. Whether it be for a year or just one game, nobody goes halfway and collapses like the Gophers. Congrats, gentlemen. You get an E for effort embarrassment.

*I totally made that number up but it sounds about right.

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As I watched that hilarity unfold,

All I could think was, “please at the end after the goopherbed has been shat, please, please show Goopher fans in the stands looking shocked and crying.”

I got my wish.

Awesome.

by Bucketochicken on Nov 20, 2008 12:08 PM CST reply actions

Kind of like

when Colorado wiped the floor with Nebraska’s (and Eric Crouch’s) asshole back in 2001. They showed little Nebraska kids balling like, well, kids on TV. It was soothing.

by Duez I say on Nov 20, 2008 1:14 PM CST up reply actions

Probably not the best method of wiping a floor, but still...

by Bucketochicken on Nov 20, 2008 1:20 PM CST up reply actions

Beautiful.

This second half was the most schaudenfreudiest time I’ve ever seen. I realize it’s horribly wrong to cheer against your team, but I was watching that game with a twinkle in my eye. You need to remember that this “bowl team” needed a last-second FG block by the biggest, dumbest animal ever to don the maroon and gold, Matt Spaeth, to beat NDSU (in a game they were horribly outplayed in) to become bowl eligible.

This epic collapses was the end of the Glen Mason era, and we all knew it while watching it unfurl before us. Some of us were shocked, others were oddly gleeful.

by WhiteSpeedReceiver on Nov 20, 2008 12:51 PM CST reply actions

The thing about that game...

and others have said this – it just FELT like this was going to happen. Even with a 31 point lead, when Tech started moving the ball, it felt like it happened in slo-mo, and most certainly felt like victory was not guaranteed for the Gophers. I have to guess that never in my life will a 31 point lead feel so uncomfortable as it did watching that second half.

If that’s what life was like as a Gopher fan under Mason, (and from the Hate Week videos it seems like it must have been) then I actually feel a little sorry for them.

OK. I’m over feeling sorry. Fuck the buck-toothed little rodents.

by YouCanPutYourEddsInIt on Nov 20, 2008 1:06 PM CST reply actions

Definately.

I remember thinking at some point in the third quater when Minnesota was still up by three scores or so that Glen was going to get himself fired. They really needed to run the clock, yet they attempted pass after pass…

by telepathetic on Nov 20, 2008 3:56 PM CST up reply actions

Your stats are WAY off

I looked it up and there are actually 832 bowls played every year.

Kevin @ Black Shoe Diaries

by KevinHD on Nov 20, 2008 1:18 PM CST reply actions

Oh snap!

Oops Pow is dropping bombs!

by Stein on Nov 20, 2008 1:25 PM CST reply actions

I remember seeing the score on the bottom line while watching another game (before the collapse began), then seeing that Texas Tech had come back later. My first thoughts, in order:

1. How the hell do you blow a 31-point lead midway through the third?
2. If I had to pick a team capable of finding a way, Minnesota wouldn’t be far down the list.

by SpartanDan on Nov 20, 2008 1:35 PM CST reply actions

I remember laughing my head off as this was happening, then sad because Glen Mason got the heave-ho. On the unintentional comedy scale, it would have been better for Minny to eke out a win to keep Glen around another year or two. We’ll only be too lucky if the Zooker and RichRod follow this season up with more hilarity.

by txhawkeye on Nov 20, 2008 1:58 PM CST reply actions