LIVENOGAMEOPENTHREAD: IDLE HANDS
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 10:51 AM CDT
in Iowa Hawkeyes Football
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Herky, spending the bye week with his bitches
No game today, but OPS and I will be here anyway. Join us for infrequent updates and inappropriate humor.
UPDATE:
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News of the morning
P.J. Hill questionable for Wisky. Pardon me while I get down on Illinois -2.5
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
To be fair
All week last week, John Clay scared me running the ball. As an opponent, I’d rather see the Northlands Yugo running the ball than John Clay. He’s going to be a beast.
I do have more rhymes than Jamaica got mangos.
by LuebkeSwims! on Oct 25, 2008 11:05 AM CDT up reply actions
I agree
P.J. looks like he’s run the ball 1000 times. Which, to be fair, he has.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 11:08 AM CDT up reply actions
And that
He’s been at Wisconsin for approximately 100 years. I swear to God, it seems like he’s been there since my freshmen year, of high school, in 1992. Why won’t he just graduate?
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
He's on the Jess Settles Scholarship Program
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 11:46 AM CDT up reply actions
I think
Tim Biakabatuka (sp? like I’m going to check that) was on the same progam.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
Hell, half the Michigan backs of my lifetime were on that plan
And nice work on proper spelling of Tsiminga Biakabatuka.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 11:54 AM CDT up reply actions
LeBron James just complimented Georgia Tech's receivers
GT has one receiver with more than 100 yards receiving.
Stick to the hoops, buddy.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Isn't that kind of like complimenting
Chuck Long’s passing ability in High School?
I do have more rhymes than Jamaica got mangos.
by LuebkeSwims! on Oct 25, 2008 11:03 AM CDT up reply actions
Wisky running right through Illinois
…so, of course, they try to pass and Sherer gets sacked.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Sherer fumbles
WIlson comes untouched off the corner. Let’s be sure we don’t let that happen next week.
Illinois gets it first and 10 at the Wisconsin…and WIlliams throws a horrible, HORRIBLE interception. This game is going to be fugly.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Wisconsin pulls the guard on third and inches
but Kemp is too fucking slow to get there. Casey McMillan would kick his fat ass.
Field goal for Wisconsin, 3-0 with 8:36 to go in the first.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
*CORRECTION*
Casey McMillan would devour his fat ass (literally and figuratively) as a light snack.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
Minnesota scores, 7-0
and the shootout is on in Lawrence. 7-7 already.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
GREAT CATCH
TIght end with long name makes a one-handed catch on another Juice Williams overthrow.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Time for the obligatory BRAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNNNNSSSSS
Post after the BTN commercial
by Internet Legend on Oct 25, 2008 11:44 AM CDT reply actions
I'm channel flipping now
I stopped briefly on Indiana-Northwestern, just in time to watch this sequence:
Indiana punt, botched and somehow taken for a first down
Indiana touchdown on some of the worst pass coverage ever
Northwestern fumbles the kick
The entire Indiana line called for a false start (seriously, that was the call by the ref)
Indiana sack for loss of 14 on 4th and 6, giving Northwestern the ball 20 yards better than they would have had it had they held the kick
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Someone finally has to punt!
KU stopped by Tech. That should do it for this one…
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Minnesota Implodes
First and goal at the 7.
Third and goal at the 25.
Dropped pass in the end zone on third down.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Touchdown Wisconsin
Sherer scrambles in from 20. Nice play.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Giada's wearing some sort of baggy shirt thing
Very disappointing.
Also, Benn just took the ensuing kick back to the Wisconsin 35.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Long field goal for Illinois ties it at 10
and I just learned how to make nougat.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 12:19 PM CDT up reply actions
Brit Miller almost goes pick 6
J Leman would have caught that
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Ron Zook's clock management skills on display again
Illinois waits 10 seconds to call time out while Zooker finishes a Sudoku puzzle on the sideline.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
I'm sorry, my head exploded
After inexplicably waiting to call timeout, Illinois doesn’t send anyone deep to field the kick and Wisconsin downs it at the 1 yard line.
Except they don’t, because the punt team (which is coached by Bielema) has FIVE PLAYERS ON THE LINE and gets flagged.
Zook, not to be not outdone, still refuses to send someone deep, and Wisconsin downs it at the 7.
My head exploded.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
ESPN2 should title Wisky/Illinois
“Clash of the Coaching Titans”
I do have more rhymes than Jamaica got mangos.
by LuebkeSwims! on Oct 25, 2008 1:05 PM CDT up reply actions
Zooker is totally rocking the Zook Face
You know, the one where he watches his team give up a big play with his jaw fully slacked, then takes off the headset and starts yelling about something.
I feel better about next weekend with every minute.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:08 PM CDT up reply actions
PLAGIARISM
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:09 PM CDT up reply actions
Juice throas the second of two horrendous picks
That one might be on his receiver, but the guy wasn’t open regardless.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
They are so stupid,
they will run that dipshit wing-t option shit next week, because Zook thinks that because his quarterback looks like Superman in his jockstrap, that no one will stop it. Zook is an underwear coach. Look good in your shorts? You get to play.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
OPS just sent a message that I simply refuse to believe
“I hope you’re watching Indiana-Northwestern”
Indiana is up 21-12. I’m giddy with anticipation of the ensuing LTP open thread chaos.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
I mean,
You have a Terrell Owens-type guy like Benn and you get outscored by Wes-consin. Please. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb football in Illinois.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
I'm sorry, but it's Zook
Have we met?
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:19 PM CDT up reply actions
However,
Illinois’ field goal kicker is fucking impressive. That one was good from 60 — against the wind.
Mr. Boh Knows ...
Indiana is trying to lose
to get a better pick in the 2009 draft.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:24 PM CDT up reply actions
I don't know who #97 is for Illinois, but he should be cut immediately
He’d have blocked that for 2 (or 6) if he didn’t flail at the ball like a girl
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:23 PM CDT up reply actions
They just compared one of IU's receivers to James Hardy
That’s impossible, as Adam Shada’s ass is not hanging from Beltcher’s dick.
AKA Shadow
Yeah
That’s what I get for putting faith in Thom Brennanman
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:30 PM CDT up reply actions
Another pick by Illinois
That one is on the receiver. Tipped, caught by the defensive back. Williams is 11-21, 160, 2 TD, 3 INT.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
It's worth mentioning
That Juice just threw a pick and Wisconsin is driving in deep Illinois territory.
Also, LOL.
AKA Shadow
Of course
P.J. Hill is now moving slower than my grandmother. And she’s been dead for 12 years.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:31 PM CDT up reply actions
That was my other grandma
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:32 PM CDT up reply actions
She thought you were Herbert Hoover
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:35 PM CDT up reply actions
Are you sure?
I think you’re too quick to dismiss the possibility of OPS’s necrophilia.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
FootbLOL alert
Purdue drives on Minnesota, biffs a 41-yarder, Minnesota still leads 10-6.
AKA Shadow
I have a feeling
Bret Bielema watched the game tape of Illinois at Iowa last year, because Juice is positively impotent—motherfucker he just threw a first down on third and long.
AKA Shadow
AKA Shadow
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:45 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm the one vote for her
And I did it before the picture!
LOLsiers
Austin Starr tries a 51-yard field goal, despite the fact that he’s never hit from farther than 46. It ended how you would expect it would. Now NU has 6 minutes to get into field goal range, aka about 35 yards.
AKA Shadow
I was going to go with "A Shot at Love" contestant, but yeah
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:48 PM CDT up reply actions
Not to be outdone...
CJ Bacher pulls a hammy during a hand off. And follows with an INT. Beautiful
¿Quieres chiclets?
by The Mexican't on Oct 25, 2008 1:49 PM CDT up reply actions
You know, I was kidding when I said KU's first punt was the end of the game
56-14 Kansas, and Rock Chalk hasn’t crossed midfield since that punt
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
The sideline reporter is KILLING Northwestern
Lethargy, the bane of all trailing football teams.
AKA Shadow
Bacher is holding his hamstring
Trey Stross just called and said that’s not going to end well
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
And, on cue, pick by Indiana
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:49 PM CDT up reply actions
4:03 from now
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:50 PM CDT up reply actions
They're using CoverItLive today
That means comments are moderated. Fuckers.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:52 PM CDT up reply actions
They're letting in my comments, though
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 1:53 PM CDT up reply actions
Purdue intercepts Minnesota late in the game
Probably too late to do anything, but 1st and 10 Boilers at their own 39, still down 17-6.
AKA Shadow
Why the fuck are they even passing there?
Tim Brewster is so terrible.
Wisconsin with one hell of a TD catch
Reviewed and upheld. Illini shitting their pants.
¿Quieres chiclets?
Kafka absolutely wrecks NU's hopes
That play was HILARIOUS. In the throes of a sack, he tries to throw it away, except it goes backwards 20 yards.
AKA Shadow
Just waiting for Indiana to blow this game like a Congressional Intern when the NW QB hammer-throws the ball thirty yards backwards to avoid a sack. It was a thing of BEAUTY.
The ‘Cats need one of their patented miracle finishes or they’ll have just lost to the worst team in the B10, assuming that Purdue secedes to the MAC , which I think is almost imminent.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
I'll be the first to say it this week
How the fuck did we lose to Northwestern?
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
If memory serves
we just kept giving them the ball. Eventually, probability allowed them to score.
by chitownhawkeye on Oct 25, 2008 7:39 PM CDT up reply actions
Wisconsin with felony assault on the receiver on 4th down.
No call, of course. Illinois about to go down.
AKA Shadow
Nope--no miracle today boys!
Still can’t believe we couldn’t BEAT DOWN these ’Cats.
You know, I think they’re my least favorite team in the league at this point.
Especially since their fans always correct my internet references to them as “NW” as offensively incorrect.
It’s as if they have somthing against compasses, the directionless a-holes.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
Dude, schadenfreude
We win that game regardless
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
by Patrick Vint on Oct 25, 2008 2:07 PM CDT up reply actions
Michigan's down
And unless it’s just Northwestern, we don’t kick when they’re down. Watching MSU choke to UM AGAIN, though, would be the highlight of my month.
AKA Shadow
Well 2/3 ain't bad so far.
When does Minny play a real team? Please tell me they have OSU on their schedule this year…..
And have they played Michigan yet?
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
NU only lost
because they had five turnovers. One of the guys on LTP said so! So, Northwestern turns the ball over five times and loses a close one to a vastly inferior team. That seems so familiar, where have I seen that before?
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
you could spend your week off coming up with Joepa dialog
if you could incorporate the cream cheese that would be great.
I don't know, Mello Yello is pretty awful. What's the worst that could happen?
I'll just say this
Minnesota has officially beaten NO ONE. And they won’t have a chance until the last game of the year. Northwestern is natch, Wisconsin is nope, Michigan is ROFL. We must stop them.
Also, the wheels come off for Northwestern. They finish 6-6, and rightfully so.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
You mean this?
This cream cheese story is good .But we can add some other story about the cream cheese.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
yes, you are correct sir
I don't know, Mello Yello is pretty awful. What's the worst that could happen?
Touchdown MSU
When your secondary can’t tackle, you don’t have much of a chance
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Have I mentioned that MSU was my pick of the day?
Quick 3-and-out for Michigan. The WLA guys are drinking heavily already.
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Did Dantoni really use "pride comes before the fall"?
Michigan State: Everyone’s little brother since 1898
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
Which is worse?
Michigan’s offense or Olive Garden’s commercials?
"Bob Zook has to be the laziest man alive"
lol that dad totally tricked his family into going for never-ending pasta
And then pretended that he didn’t even know! You could tell that he totally did though. He’s a schemer.
At least it's not on the B10 Networks'....
…..endless rotation of only four commercials, three of which are for the B10 Network.
The other is the infamous ’Ro-Tel Tomato" cheese-dip dancing peppers.
On the other hand, a can of Ro-Tel tomatoes mixed with melted Velveeta tastes real, real good.
Whereas, on a bad day, Olive Garden can taste real, real bad.
And it can be a never-ending bad, if you want.
If it's not too much trouble, search your soul--and then ask yourself if maybe I might have a point.
Woooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!
COME TO PENN STAAAAAAAAAAAAATE!!!!!
Also, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahah Illinois.
by Bucketochicken on Oct 25, 2008 10:10 PM CDT reply actions
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