BHGP New Year's Resolutions

Welcome to 2008, readers. From an athletic standpoint, 2007 sucked so hard that it took the last three months of '06 with it. There was scant good news, a metric shitload of bad news, and a horror show of a basketball season that's only getting worse.

Non-binding resolutions: they're not just for the Senate!

So in the spirit of the holiday, we'll be considering what we're looking forward to in 2008, and hearing from some old familiar faces as well.

Hawkeye State

1. Start eating better

2. Buy a new car

3. Take more road trips to Hawkeye away games

4. Renovate the main bathroom

5. Join Rockapella, search for Carmen Sandiego

Oops Pow Surprise

1. Stay in close touch with my family

2. Get a promotion at work

3. Visit Europe again, spend more than one day in Brussels

4. Find Jesus Christ*

JHC

1. Shower every day

2. Write every day

3. Do a triathlon

4. Get a book published

5. Learn to juggle bowling balls

Kirk Ferentz

1. Recruit kids who will not create their own gang

2. Cut down on the gum

3. Talk like a person and not a computerized help line

Jake Christensen

1. Knock a tenth of a second off my 40 time

2. Throw with my eyes open

3. Make Coach O'Keefe cut it out with the Good Games while I am in the shower

4. Learn receivers' names

Todd Lickliter

1. Stop referring to Seth Gorney as "The Mongoloid" to assistant coaches and my family

2. Review pros and cons of spending rest of season in drunken stupor

3. Get Barta to take Drake off next five schedules

4. Emotionally separate self from Butler job, no matter how far up the Top 25 the Dawgs get

5. Goddammit I miss them

Dominique Douglas

1. steal a million dollars

2. steal a hunnerd cars

3. steal tha empire state building

Dan Bohall

1. Win seven games in the Big Ten

2. Get starting position back

3. Shoot 50% from field

4. Finish "Bacardi Silver vs. Smirnoff Ice" thesis

5. Save up $$$ to get lower back tattoo

Ron Zook

1. BUY STIOCK IN RED BULL

2. LEARN HOW TO SPELL ARELIEAS

3. WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

4. KEEP ROLLLIN

Rey Maualuga

1. Maim

2. Kill

3. Kill again

*...on a household object, sell said object on eBay